Building— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Câu trả lời cần rõ ràng hơn, dùng thì và cấu trúc ngữ pháp chính xác, tránh lỗi số nhiều/số ít và thì thời gian mâu thuẫn. Nên mở đầu bằng câu chủ đề ngắn gọn, sau đó cung cấp chi tiết cụ thể và liên kết bằng từ nối. Ví dụ: sửa các lỗi như "department" -> "department store/complex", "office tower" (số nhiều), và dùng thì phù hợp (completed -> was completed; next year -> last year hoặc next year với ngữ cảnh tương lai rõ ràng).

例: Yes, there are several tall buildings near my home. Most of them are modern office towers and shopping complexes. For instance, a new 50-storey tower was completed last year and has become a local landmark, attracting many businesses and visitors.

提案: Câu trả lời tự nhiên nhưng cần chú ý trôi chảy, tránh lặp từ và ngữ pháp sai. Sử dụng liên từ để nối câu (e.g., "because", "so") và sửa lỗi như "be by by I". Thêm chi tiết cụ thể (khi nào, loại kiến trúc bạn thích) để tăng điểm nội dung và từ vựng.

例: Yes, I do. If a building looks particularly striking or imposing, I usually take a photo to remember its design and scale because I enjoy architectural details. I often post the best shots on my social media so my friends and followers can see and comment.

提案: Cần sửa ngữ pháp và làm rõ ý: dùng số ít/đa số đúng (a very tall building), tránh từ lắp (umm) trong bài thi, và diễn đạt mục đích rõ ràng. Nên mở bằng câu chủ đề và nối các ý bằng liên từ. Thêm chi tiết cụ thể như vị trí, vì sao muốn đến, và hoạt động dự định khi thăm.

例: Yes. I would like to visit a very tall building in Ho Chi Minh City called Landmark 81. I have heard a lot about its observation deck and I want to go up to see panoramic views of the city. I am also curious about its modern architecture and interior design.

提案: Câu trả lời cần mạch lạc hơn và tránh lỗi ngôn ngữ gây khó hiểu. Bắt đầu với câu chủ đề rõ ràng (Yes/No and why), sử dụng lý do cụ thể liên kết bằng từ nối và loại bỏ phần không rõ nghĩa. Nên nêu rõ sở thích thay thế (ví dụ: nhà có vườn) và giải thích vì sao.

例: No, I wouldn't want to live in a very tall building. They often feel crowded and lack private outdoor space. I would prefer a house with a large garden where I can relax and my children can play.

× There are many modern department complexes and office tower.

✓ There are many modern department complexes and office towers.

The noun 'tower' should be plural to match 'There are' and the list of multiple items. Use 'towers' for agreement between subject and noun phrase.

× For example, a new story block were completed next year and has become a global landmark that provides soft and office for many young people and business.

✓ For example, a new-story block will be completed next year and will become a global landmark that provides shops and offices for many young people and businesses.

The original mixes past tense 'were completed' with 'next year' which requires future tense. Use 'will be completed' and 'will become'. Also 'soft' seems incorrect; 'shops' fits context and 'office' should be plural 'offices'. 'Business' should be plural 'businesses' when speaking generally.

× When I see a building is particularly striking or imposing, I take a picture to remember its design and scale.

✓ When I see a building that is particularly striking or imposing, I take a picture to remember its design and scale.

Missing relative pronoun 'that' (or 'which') to connect the clauses. This is a sentence structure issue requiring the present participle form to be connected properly with a relative clause.

× I also post these pictures on my social media so my fans and followers can see and be by by I.

✓ I also post these pictures on my social media so my fans and followers can see them and enjoy my posts.

Original sentence has unclear phrase 'be by by I' which is ungrammatical. Replace with 'see them and enjoy my posts' to express intended meaning clearly and correct pronoun use 'them' for pictures.

× There's a very tall buildings in Ho Chi Minh City called Lamar, at least one I have heard many time for my fans and I would like to have a chain to see the city from the high building view Umm.

✓ There are very tall buildings in Ho Chi Minh City called Lamar; I have heard about them many times, and I would like to have a chance to see the city from the high viewpoint.

Use 'There are' with plural 'buildings'. 'I have heard many time' should be 'many times' and 'have a chain' is incorrect; use 'have a chance'. 'High building view' is awkward; use 'high viewpoint'. Also correct pronoun/reference and punctuation for clarity.

× Moreover, I would like to see its architecture and how big it is.

✓ Moreover, I would like to see its architecture and how big it is in person.

Adding 'in person' clarifies desire to visit. Original is grammatically acceptable but can be improved by adding a prepositional phrase to express visiting.

× To be honest, I wouldn't want to live in the top building because they often have many shared facilities and can feel crowded.

✓ To be honest, I wouldn't want to live in a top building because they often have many shared facilities and can feel crowded.

Use 'a top building' (indefinite) instead of 'the top building' to generalize. Modal 'wouldn't want' is correct. Ensure noun phrase matches general meaning.

× I refer a detected how whether large garden where I can relax real vegetable roll raised castle and my children can place.

✓ I prefer a detached house with a large garden where I can relax, grow vegetables, and where my children can play.

Original sentence is unintelligible with many wrong words. 'Refer' should be 'prefer'; 'detected' -> 'detached'; 'real vegetable roll raised castle' replaced by 'grow vegetables'; 'my children can place' -> 'my children can play'. Also fixes word order and uses correct verbs and nouns for clarity.