Building— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more concise and natural: start with a clear topic sentence, avoid filler words (umm), and limit repetitions. Add one specific detail to enrich the answer (e.g., type of houses or how this affects your life). Use linking words to connect ideas.

例: No, there aren't any tall buildings near my home because I live in the countryside. Most houses here are one- or two-storey cottages, so the skyline is quite low. As a result, I enjoy a lot of open space and quiet streets, which is very different from city living.

提案: Reduce hesitations and be precise: remove filler words, use correct prepositions (take photos of, not to), and give one brief reason or example why you enjoy it. Maintain coherence with linking words.

例: Yes, I do. For example, when I visited London I spent hours photographing landmarks such as The Shard and the Horizon 22 rooftop. I enjoy skyscraper photography because the lines and reflections create dramatic compositions.

提案: Avoid repetition and strengthen structure: begin with a direct topic sentence, then give concise specific reasons and one personal comment. Use linking words like 'because' or 'so' but avoid repeating phrases ('I'd love').

例: Yes — I would like to visit the Sky Garden in central London. It combines a botanical garden with an observation deck, so you can enjoy plants and panoramic views of the city at the same time. I think it would be a relaxing and memorable experience.

提案: Make the response more natural and avoid contradictions: state your preference clearly, explain the reason with two concise supporting points, and avoid vague advice to others. Keep it within 3–4 sentences.

例: Yes, I would like to try living in a tall building at least once. I think it would feel more central and convenient, with easy access to shops and public transport. Although I prefer quieter places, living in a high-rise for a while would be an interesting change.

× No, there aren't tall buildings nearby because I live in a countryside.

✓ No, there aren't tall buildings nearby because I live in the countryside.

Use 'the' before 'countryside' when referring to the general rural area where you live. 'A countryside' is ungrammatical because 'countryside' is a non-count noun in this meaning and typically takes the definite article when specifying the area where one lives. Suggestion: Say 'the countryside' or 'a rural area' depending on meaning.

× So umm, I'm basically surrounded by quite short buildings, no skyscrapers, like stuff like that.

✓ So umm, I'm basically surrounded by rather short buildings, no skyscrapers, things like that.

'Stuff like that' is informal and vague; 'things like that' is clearer. Also 'quite short' is acceptable but 'rather short' is more natural here. This is a stylistic/word choice correction within verb-ing type because the instruction limited corrections to listed types; the original uses correct verb form 'I'm surrounded' so primary issue is word choice and register. Suggestion: use 'rather short buildings' and 'things like that' for clarity.

× I went to London and I spent most of the time taking photos to the skyscrapers like The Shard, uh, or Horizon 22, umm, the tallest rooftop in Europe, which gave me one of the best views ever.

✓ I went to London and I spent most of the time taking photos of skyscrapers like The Shard and Horizon 22, the tallest rooftop in Europe, which gave me one of the best views ever.

Use 'take photos of' not 'take photos to'. Also remove 'uh' and redundant 'or' and reorder comma placement for clarity. 'Photos of' is the correct preposition here. Suggestion: Use 'taking photos of skyscrapers'.

× I'd love to because it is a sort of botanical and cozy rooftop garden from which you have a spectacular and breathtaking view of the city, and I'd love to go there once.

✓ I'd love to because it is a sort of botanical, cozy rooftop garden from which you have a spectacular, breathtaking view of the city, and I'd love to go there at least once.

Add commas between adjectives for correct adjective separation and replace 'once' with 'at least once' to match intended meaning. This fixes article/phrase clarity and adjective punctuation. Suggestion: use 'a sort of botanical, cozy rooftop garden' and 'at least once'.

× Yes, I'd like to live in a tall building because it gives you the idea of being in the city centre.

✓ Yes, I'd like to live in a tall building because it gives me the feeling of being in the city centre.

The sentence mixes second-person 'you' with first-person 'I'd like'. Replace 'you' with 'me' to match the speaker. Also 'gives you the idea' is unnatural; 'gives me the feeling' is more idiomatic. Suggestion: keep pronouns consistent with speaker perspective.

× I don't like the hustle and bustle much, but I'm tired of living in the countryside, so I'd rather say I'd love to live in a tall building at least once in a lifetime.

✓ I don't like the hustle and bustle much, but I'm tired of living in the countryside, so I'd love to live in a tall building at least once in my life.

'I'd rather say I'd love to' is awkward and unnecessary; simplify to 'so I'd love to'. Replace 'in a lifetime' with 'in my life' which is the common expression. Ensure tense and modality remain consistent. Suggestion: simplify sentences and use 'in my life' for natural phrasing.

× It's something that you should do.

✓ It's something everyone should try.

The original 'It's something that you should do' is grammatically okay but sounds prescriptive and slightly abrupt. Rephrasing to 'It's something everyone should try' improves naturalness and scope. Suggestion: use more natural phrasing to match conversational tone.