Travelling— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: 回答应更直接并使用更自然的句型，避免犹豫词（uh, umm）和重复。可以先用一句主题句回答问题，再用一到两句具体细节支持，使用连词（for example, because, so）保持逻辑连贯。注意语法（例如时态和冠词）和词汇搭配（“look out of the window”应为“look out of the window”或更自然的“look out the window”，“sky sculptures”不常用，可用“sky at dusk”）。

例: Yes, I often look out the window when I travel by bus or car. I find watching the passing scenery very relaxing because it helps me unwind after a busy day. For example, I enjoy observing local people and the colours of the sky at dusk, which always feels mysterious and calming.

提案: 回答要更简洁并保证语法正确，避免错误的时态和结构（如“It has often take”应为“I often take”或“I have often taken”）。先直接回答，然后给出具体原因或例子，使用连接词（because, so）使句子连贯，并注意主谓一致和代词使用。

例: Yes, I often take photos through the car window because I love capturing everyday life. For instance, I frequently photograph people and small daily scenes that remind me of the lovely moments in life.

提案: 回答应更自然、礼貌并修正词汇和句法错误（如“mobile friends”不明确，可改为“friends who like hiking”；“cheat out”无意义，应为“chill out”或“calm”）。避免填充词（uh）并控制句子数量与长度。先给出明确偏好，再说明具体原因并可给出一个简短例子。

例: I prefer the mountains to the sea because my friends often take me hiking and I enjoy the exercise. The mountains make me feel relaxed and happy, while I dislike the sea because I am afraid of deep water and rough waves.

× Yes, I guess out of the window.

✓ Yes, I look out of the window.

句子原本结构不完整，使用了動詞短語“guess out of the window”不符合英语习惯。应使用完整的动词结构“I look out of the window”来回答“Do you look out the window...?”这样更符合语法和语境。建议：直接用动词 look 或 watch 回答，保持句子完整。

× I'm traveling by bus or by car because I find watching a passing scenery relaxing and the best way to unwind, uh, for example, I enjoy watching the locals and the sky sculptures, uh, at dusk, uh, I think there is umm, mysterious.

✓ I travel by bus or car because I find watching passing scenery relaxing and the best way to unwind. For example, I enjoy watching the locals and the sky at dusk; I think it is rather mysterious.

原句时态和表达混乱。与一般习惯和现在时描述习惯性动作应使用一般现在时（travel / find / enjoy）。短语“a passing scenery”用法不自然，应为“passing scenery”或“the passing scenery”。“sky sculptures”不常用，改为“the sky”。“I think there is mysterious”结构错误，需用“It is mysterious”。建议：描述习惯用一般现在时，修正名词短语与从句结构。

× It has often take photos through the car window because I'm someone who loves life, so I often capture the people and the daily things around us with my camera.

✓ I often take photos through the car window because I'm someone who loves life, so I often capture people and everyday things around me with my camera.

原句“It has often take photos”语法错误：错误地使用了助动词形式及动词时态。描述习惯动作应使用一般现在时“I often take photos”。此外“the people and the daily things around us”较啰嗦，改为“people and everyday things around me”。建议：把动词改为一般现在时，简化名词短语。

× It's always reminds me of lovely things in life.

✓ It always reminds me of the lovely things in life.

原句“It's always reminds me”中同时使用了系动词缩写+动词(reminds)，导致重复主语/助动词错误。正确结构为“It always reminds me...”或“It's always reminding me...”另外加上“the”使表达更自然。建议：去掉多余的助动词/缩写，保持单一谓语。

× I prefer mountains to the sea because our recent mobile friends often take me hiking to exercise.

✓ I prefer the mountains to the sea because my friends often take me hiking to exercise recently.

原句“our recent mobile friends”词序和词汇选择不当，难以理解。“recent”与“friends”搭配需放在朋友之前并且含义不明；“mobile”不合语境。将主语改为“my friends”并把“recently”放在句尾表示最近发生的动作更自然。建议：用合适的形容词并按常见词序排列。

× I feel so cheat out and joyful and I really dislike the sea.

✓ I feel so cheerful and joyful, and I really dislike the sea.

原句使用“cheat out”是错误搭配，可能想表达“cheerful”或“comfortable”。应使用正确的形容词“cheerful”。并用逗号连接并列形容词。建议：检查要表达的情感并选择合适形容词。

× Uh, I feel afraid of the deep water and the rough waves.

✓ I am afraid of deep water and rough waves.

原句“the deep water and the rough waves”中定冠词“the”可省略以表达泛指。另一点是主语时态可用“I am afraid of...”更自然。建议：表示一般惧怕时去掉定冠词并使用“be afraid of”结构。

× I feel comfortable in the mountain actually.

✓ I actually feel comfortable in the mountains.

原句“in the mountain”单数与习惯性偏好表达不符，通常使用复数“mountains”表示在山中或关于山区的一般偏好；副词位置调整为“actually”放在动词前更自然。建议：使用复数mountains并把副词放在常规位置。