Travelling— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: 注意语法和时态，减少冗长表达，并在回答开头给出更直接的主题句。可以修正动词形式（如 watch → watch/ am watching/ I watch； travel → traveling），并用连接词自然衔接细节。同时控制在不超过5句内，避免重复“feel”。

例: Yes, I usually look out of the window when I travel by car or bus. For example, when I ride in my dad’s car I often watch people and street scenes, which helps me relax after a busy day.

提案: 改进句子结构和词汇选择，使表达更自然并补充具体例子。注意冠词和代词使用（比如 remove extra “it”），用连接词解释原因并给出条件说明。

例: Not very often, because I’m not really into skylines or landscapes. I only take photos when something stands out—for instance, an unusual building or a dramatic sunset that looks different from the usual view.

提案: 注意用词准确（如 'comb' 应为 'calm' 或 'breeze' 等），以及语法（如 'only can be offered' → 'can only be offered'）。回答要有主题句、原因和具体细节，避免重复形容词并用连词组织逻辑。

例: I prefer the sea to the mountains because I love swimming and relaxing on the beach. The sea offers a wide, open view and a calm atmosphere, and its clear water makes swimming very enjoyable.

× Yes, I always watching the view when I traveling by car and by bus, especially when I'm on my dad's car, I feel really comfortable to observe the people outside the window. It makes me feel very relaxed.

✓ Yes, I always watch the view when I travel by car or by bus. Especially when I'm in my dad's car, I feel really comfortable observing the people outside the window. It makes me feel very relaxed.

问题类型：动词+ -ing 形式 和 句子结构/主谓一致。错误包括： 1) “I always watching” 应为一般现在时的习惯动作，动词需用原形“watch”并与主语一致。2) “when I traveling” 省略助动词，应为“when I travel”。3) “on my dad's car” 介词使用错误，应为“in my dad's car”。4) 使用两个并列句时建议分句或用连词，这里将长句分为两句并把“to observe”改为现在分词“observing”使表达更自然。 建议：描述习惯性动作用一般现在时（主语 + 动词原形/第三人称单数+s），移动工具通常用“in” car；想表达同时进行或目的时可用现在分词。

× Not very often because I'm not a big fan of skyline or nature environment, so if it I have to take the photos it must be a unique skyline or some special structure.

✓ Not very often because I'm not a big fan of skylines or natural scenery, so if I have to take photos it must be because the skyline is unique or there is some special structure.

问题类型：情态动词/句子结构与名词使用错误。错误包括： 1) “skyline or nature environment” 名词搭配不自然，应为“skylines”或“natural scenery”。2) “if it I have to take the photos” 语序错误且多余“it”，应为“if I have to take photos”。3) “it must be a unique skyline or some special structure” 逻辑不够清晰，改为“it must be because the skyline is unique or there is some special structure”。 建议：注意名词单复数和固定搭配（natural scenery），从句中不要多加无用代词“it”，情态/推测用“must be because...”更清楚。

× I prefer sea to mountains because I love to swim and I enjoy the comb which is only can be offered by the sea.

✓ I prefer the sea to the mountains because I love to swim and I enjoy the calm that can only be offered by the sea.

问题类型：连词/从句结构与名词使用错误。错误包括： 1) “prefer sea to mountains” 最好在可数名词前加定冠词，改为“the sea/the mountains”。2) “enjoy the comb” 用词错误，猜测想说“calm”或“comb”拼写错误，应为“calm”或“breeze/comfort”，根据语境改为“calm”。3) “which is only can be offered” 从句中助动词位置错误，应为“that can only be offered”或“which can only be offered”。 建议：使用固定表达“prefer X to Y”时常在具体事物前加定冠词；注意单词拼写与搭配；限制性定语从句中助动词位置要正确（主语+助动词+动词）。

× It is very clear and very wide, very clean and help people to immense in the water so I like it better.

✓ The water is very clear, very wide, and very clean, and it helps people immerse themselves in the water, so I like it better.

问题类型：形容词/副词使用与句子结构错误。错误包括： 1) 原句“It is very clear and very wide, very clean” 指代不明确，改为“The water is ...”。2) “help people to immense in the water” 单词用错且不及物，正确动词为“immerse”，且要用“immerse themselves in the water”或“be immersed in the water”。3) 句子缺少连词导致读起来不顺，增加“and”连接主句，并保持一致的时态与主谓一致。 建议：注意动词选择（immerse vs. immense），及其及物/不及物用法；保持主语明确并确保谓语与主语一致；列举形容词时用逗号或并列连词。