Travelling— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Câu trả lời có ý tưởng rõ ràng nhưng cần cải thiện ngữ pháp, trật tự từ và ngắt câu để tự nhiên hơn; tránh lặp từ và thêm liên từ phù hợp để mạch lạc. Cụ thể: sửa thì ("when I traveling" → "when I travel"), động từ số nhiều/ít ("landscape make" → "landscapes make"), thay "their" bằng "them" hoặc nói rõ đối tượng, tách câu dài thành 2 câu tối đa, và dùng một liên từ như "so" hay "therefore" hợp lý.

例: Yes, I often look out of the window when I travel by bus or car because the beautiful landscapes make me feel relaxed and peaceful. I also take many photos to share the views with my friends.

提案: Nội dung rõ ràng nhưng ngữ pháp và diễn đạt còn lộn xộn, nhiều lỗi: chia số nhiều/ít ("photo" → "photos"), thiếu mạo từ/giới từ ("outside car window" → "outside the car window"), câu cuối khó hiểu và cần sửa cấu trúc để diễn đạt ý nhớ lại kỷ niệm ("the photos can remember where play I have gone to" → "the photos help me remember the places I've visited"). Nên nối câu bằng liên từ hợp lý và giữ tối đa 2–3 câu.

例: Yes, I do. I often take photos of the scenery outside the car window, and I share them with my friends. The photos help me remember the places I have visited.

提案: Trả lời thiếu rõ ràng, có lỗi dùng từ ("Martin" có thể là "mountain"), thì và ngữ pháp sai ("look very strong", "when I look for I look at Disney"), câu dài rời rạc. Cần nói trực tiếp chủ đề trước (topic sentence), so sánh cụ thể giữa núi và biển, dùng liên từ như "because"/"however" để nối ý, và sửa lỗi từ vựng ("majestic" hợp lý, nhưng phải dùng đúng danh từ).

例: I like both the mountains and the sea. Mountains feel majestic and powerful, which I find inspiring, while the sea is romantic and calming, so I relax when I look at it.

× Yes, I do, I often look out the window at the scenery when I traveling by bus or car because the beautiful landscape make me feel more comfortable and peaceful, and I want to share their beautiful views to my friends, so I take many photos.

✓ Yes, I do. I often look out the window at the scenery when I am traveling by bus or car because the beautiful landscape makes me feel more comfortable and peaceful, and I want to share its beautiful views with my friends, so I take many photos.

Several present tense and subject-verb agreement errors: use present continuous 'I am traveling' for action in progress; singular 'landscape' requires 'makes' not 'make'; refer to 'its beautiful views' (landscape is singular) and use 'with my friends' not 'to my friends'. Suggestions: use 'I am traveling' for ongoing action, ensure subject and verb agree (landscape/makes), and use correct preposition 'with'.

× Yes I do. I often take photo of scenery outside car window and I often say this to my friends and because the photos can remember where play I have gone to.

✓ Yes, I do. I often take photos of the scenery outside the car window and I often tell this to my friends because the photos can help me remember where I have been.

Errors: 'photo' should be plural 'photos' to match 'often take'; missing articles 'the scenery' and 'the car window'; 'say this to my friends' is better as 'tell this to my friends'; awkward clause 'the photos can remember where play I have gone to' should be 'the photos can help me remember where I have been'. Suggestions: use plural nouns when appropriate, include definite articles for specific nouns, and use 'help me remember' with correct past participle 'have been'.

× I prefer both of them because Martin is majestic and look very strong and the sea is romantic and when I look for I look at Disney, I'm feel very relaxed.

✓ I prefer both of them because the mountain is majestic and looks very strong, and the sea is romantic; when I look at it, I feel very relaxed.

Multiple article and agreement errors: 'Martin' seems to be 'mountain' and needs the article 'the mountain'; verb 'look' should be 'looks' to agree with singular subject; 'when I look for I look at Disney' is unclear – likely intended 'when I look at it' (the sea or mountain) or 'at the sea' so corrected to 'when I look at it'; 'I'm feel' should be 'I feel'. Suggestions: use correct noun ('mountain'), include the definite article 'the' for specific natural features, ensure verb agrees with subject, and remove unnecessary auxiliary 'am' before 'feel'.