Travelling— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: 回答较自然，但有语法和表达不够精确的问题，内容可更具体并用连词使结构更清晰。建议：1) 开头直接回答问题的同时用一句主题句阐明原因；2) 用1-2句具体细节说明（例如描述具体看到的景色或感觉）；3) 使用连词（such as, so, because）连接句子；4) 注意语法和词汇搭配，如“go easy”用法不准确，可改为“feel relaxed”。

例: Yes, I usually look out of the window when I travel by bus because it helps me avoid motion sickness and feel relaxed. For example, I often watch passing buildings and parks, which distracts me from the movement of the vehicle. So I mostly just sit quietly and enjoy the view.

提案: 回答有积极信息但不完整且表达混乱，句子不连贯，有未完成的句子。建议：1) 给出明确的肯定/否定并说明频率；2) 提供具体例子并完整描述拍摄场景；3) 使用连词（for example, because, when）使句子流畅；4) 避免碎句和重复，保证不超过5句。

例: Yes, I often take photos when I see a beautiful view, especially during bus rides along the coast. For example, when the bus follows the shoreline I take several shots of the sea and cliffs because the light and colors can be stunning. I later keep these photos to remember the trip.

提案: 回答明确但存在语法错误与表达不自然（如“I. Usually hanged out”）。建议：1) 开头直接表明偏好并给出原因；2) 用一两句具体例子说明童年经历或感受；3) 注意时态和动词形式（play/hang out, grew up）以及词汇搭配（breadth of the ocean可改为“vastness”或“open sea”）；4) 控制在最多5句内。

例: I prefer the sea because I grew up in a coastal city and spent a lot of time on the beach with my parents. For instance, we often watched the sunset and walked along the shore, which made me appreciate the vastness and calm of the ocean.

× Yes, I think it's an effective way to avoid being dizzy.

✓ Yes, I think it's an effective way to avoid feeling dizzy.

原句中使用了被动结构 "being dizzy" 不够自然，通常用 "feel dizzy" 表达“感到头晕”。建议使用动词短语 "feel dizzy" 来表达感觉。

× I am a person who really goes easy when travelling by bus, so I always look outside and just think.

✓ I am a person who really takes it easy when travelling by bus, so I always look outside and just think.

原句 "goes easy" 用法不正确，习惯表达是 "take it easy"，表示“放松”。保持时态和语境，用 "takes" 因为主语是单数第三人称 "a person who" 后面的动词使用第三人称单数形式。

× Yes, I often take sceneries when I see something really beautiful.

✓ Yes, I often take pictures of the scenery when I see something really beautiful.

"scenery" 是不可数名词，不能用复数形式 "sceneries"。应使用可数名词 "pictures"（照片）或改为不可数形式 "the scenery"。因此改为 "take pictures of the scenery" 更自然。

× For example, I am living in the coastal city, so there is a bus.

✓ For example, I live in a coastal city, so there are buses.

1) 语境描述习惯用一般现在时 "I live" 而不是现在进行时 "I am living"（除非强调暂时居住）。2) 原句 "there is a bus" 与后文语境（沿海线行驶）不一致，应使用复数 "buses" 或者表达为 "buses run along the coastline"，因此用复数并改为一般现在时更合适。

× You're traveling along the coastline and that scenery is so breathtaking.

✓ You travel along the coastline and the scenery is so breathtaking.

在叙述习惯性或一般事实时应使用一般现在时，因此把 "You're traveling" 改为 "You travel"。另外将 "that scenery" 改为更自然的定冠词搭配 "the scenery"。

× And I usually take a.

✓ And I usually take a photo.

原句不完整，缺少名词导致句子没有完整谓语宾语结构。补充 "photo"（或 "picture"）使句子完整。

× I think the reason is that I was born in the coastal city and I.

✓ I think the reason is that I was born in a coastal city and I usually hung out with my parents on the beach.

原句不完整，且时态和表达不一致。先使用过去时 "was born" 描述出生，然后接着描述过去常做的事情应使用过去时或过去习惯用法 "usually hung out"。另外把 "beaches" 改为单数更自然为 "the beach" 或保持复数需与语境一致。

× Usually hanged out with my parents on the beaches and I love the breadth of ocean.

✓ I usually hung out with my parents on the beach and I love the vastness of the ocean.

1) "hanged out" 用法错误，正确短语是 "hang out"，过去式为 "hung out"。2) "on the beaches" 在此语境可改为单数 "on the beach" 或保留复数，取决于习惯；我将其改为 "on the beach"。3) "breadth of ocean" 不自然，常用表达为 "vastness of the ocean" 或 "the breadth of the ocean"（需加定冠词）。建议使用更地道的词汇搭配。