Travelling— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Make the answer more natural and correct minor grammar/word-choice errors, keep it concise (≤5 sentences), and add one specific supporting detail linked with a connector. For example, correct “lookout” to “look out” and use a linking word such as “because” or “so” to show reason. Try: topic sentence + one specific detail about what you enjoy seeing.

例: Yes, I usually look out of the window because I enjoy watching the changing scenery. For instance, when I travel to a new town I like to notice old buildings and street life, which helps me learn about the place.

提案: Fix pronunciation/word-choice and grammar errors, avoid filler letters and incorrect words (e.g., remove the stray “D”, change “cart” to “car”, and “friend” to “frame” or “photograph”). Keep the answer one or two clear sentences and use a linking word like “because” to explain your reason specifically (e.g., mention motion blur).

例: No, I usually don’t because photos taken from a moving car often come out blurry. I prefer to take pictures when we stop or walk around so I can frame them properly.

提案: Reduce hesitation sounds (“umm”, “uh”), correct grammar (e.g., “want to have adventures” or “go on adventures”), and give a clear topic sentence with one specific reason for each preference connected by linking words (e.g., “however”, “because”). Keep to maximum five sentences.

例: It depends on my mood: I enjoy going on adventures in the mountains because I like hiking and fresh air, but I also like relaxing by the sea to unwind. If my friends prefer the beach, I’m happy to join them because social trips are fun.

× Yes, I often lookout the windows because I like to watch the scenery go by, especially if I am traveling somewhere new.

✓ Yes, I often look out of the window because I like to watch the scenery go by, especially if I am traveling somewhere new.

The student used 'lookout' (a noun) instead of the phrasal verb 'look out' and used plural 'windows' which is unnecessary with 'the' context; correct form is 'look out of the window' or 'look out the window'. Use the verb phrase 'look out' and match article and number to the context. Suggestion: use 'look out (of) the window' and avoid merging words into nouns.

× No, I usually D don't. Photos taken from a moving cart often come out blurry so I prefer to wait until we stop or take pictures on foot when I can friend them properly.

✓ No, I usually don't. Photos taken from a moving car often come out blurry, so I prefer to wait until we stop or take pictures on foot when I can frame them properly.

There are multiple issues: 'D don't' is an error in contraction/typing; 'cart' should be 'car' (wrong word choice but fits grammar category of verb usage here because modal/auxiliary was broken); 'friend' is incorrect verb choice and should be 'frame'. Also a missing comma before 'so'. Suggestions: write the negative auxiliary correctly as 'don't', choose correct nouns ('car') and verbs ('frame'), and add comma for clarity.

× It depends, sometimes I want to adventures in the mountains, other times I want to relax by the sea.

✓ It depends; sometimes I want to have adventures in the mountains, other times I want to relax by the sea.

The verb phrase 'want to adventures' is incorrect because 'adventures' is a noun and needs a verb like 'have' or use verb form 'go adventuring'. Correct options: 'want to have adventures' or 'want to go adventuring'. Suggestion: use 'want to have adventures' or 'want to go adventuring' to form a proper verb phrase.

× Umm, maybe if uh, my friends like to go to the sea, I will go with them.

✓ Umm, maybe if my friends want to go to the sea, I will go with them.

In conditional sentences about possible future situations, use present tense in the if-clause ('my friends want') rather than 'like to' which is acceptable but less natural here; 'like to go to the sea' is not wrong but 'want to' matches 'will' future more clearly. Also remove filler 'uh' and extra comma for smoother speech. Suggestion: use 'if my friends want to go to the sea, I will go with them'.