Travelling— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Your answer is natural, directly addresses the question and gives a clear reason. To improve, reduce filler words and tighten the structure: start with a clear topic sentence, then add one specific supporting detail using a linking word. Aim for 2–3 sentences and avoid repetition (e.g., "do" and "usually" together).

例: Yes, I usually look out the window when I travel by bus or car because I enjoy the changing scenery. For example, I like watching countryside fields and small villages pass by, which helps me relax during long journeys.

提案: The answer is relevant but has hesitations and a repetition error (“it it”) which reduce fluency. To improve, remove fillers, correct errors, and add a brief specific example or frequency using a linking word. Keep it concise (1–2 sentences).

例: Yes, I often take photos of the scenery outside the window because they serve as souvenirs; for instance, I always photograph unusual buildings or colourful landscapes to remember the trip.

提案: Your response answers the question and gives reasons, but frequent hesitations and slightly awkward phrasing weaken coherence. Improve by removing fillers, using clear linking words, and providing one concise, specific reason with an example. Limit to 2–3 sentences.

例: I like both, but I prefer the sea because I enjoy marine life and swimming. For example, I love watching fish and snorkelling when I visit the coast, which I can't do in the mountains.

× Yes, I do usually look out the window at the scenery when traveling by bus or car because I like enjoying the view and it makes me feel at peace.

✓ Yes, I usually do look out the window at the scenery when traveling by bus or car because I enjoy the view and it makes me feel at peace.

Two issues: adverb placement and verb choice. 'Usually' should appear before the main auxiliary 'do' or directly before the main verb for natural word order: 'I usually do look' or 'I usually look'. Also 'like enjoying' is awkward here; use the simple verb 'enjoy' after 'like' or omit 'like' and use 'enjoy'. Suggestion: place adverbs before the main verb and use 'enjoy' for habitual preferences. (Primary mapped problem: incorrect adverb placement / sentence structure.)

× Yes, of course I do take photos of the scenery outside the car window because it it will serve as my, uh, memory or souvenir.

✓ Yes, of course I do take photos of the scenery outside the car window because they will serve as my memories or souvenirs.

Errors: repetition 'it it' and wrong pronoun/number agreement. 'Photos' is plural, so use plural pronoun 'they' and plural nouns 'memories' or 'souvenirs'. Also present habitual action 'do take' can stay, and 'will serve' is acceptable if referring to future use, but ensure agreement. Suggestion: remove repeated word, match pronoun and noun number to 'photos', and choose singular/plural consistently. (Primary mapped problem: singular/plural issue and sentence structure.)

× I actually like both, but I do prefer the sea because, uh, it includes a lot of uh, creatures, uh, which I love and I also love swimming. Therefore I prefer sea over mountains.

✓ I actually like both, but I do prefer the sea because it has many creatures, which I love, and I also love swimming. Therefore I prefer the sea to the mountains.

Multiple issues: 'includes a lot of creatures' is grammatical but wordier; 'has many creatures' is more natural. The phrase 'prefer sea over mountains' requires articles and the correct preposition: use 'the sea' and 'the mountains', and 'prefer X to Y' is the standard construction (not 'prefer X over Y'). Suggestion: use articles with specific geographical nouns ('the sea', 'the mountains'), use 'prefer A to B', and simplify 'includes a lot of creatures' to 'has many creatures'. (Primary mapped problem: incorrect use of prepositions and article errors.)