Views— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more concise and correct grammar. Start with a clear topic sentence, then add one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Correct plural and tense errors (e.g., "memories" and "becomes"/"become").

例: Yes, I enjoy photographing different views because it makes me happy. For example, I often take photos of sunsets and cityscapes and save them on my phone so I can look back at those memories later.

提案: Use a clear topic sentence and organize supporting details with linking words. Replace vague phrases ("so many good feel") with specific descriptions and correct repetition. Keep within 3–4 sentences maximum.

例: I prefer photographing rural areas because they offer peaceful, natural scenery. For instance, the green fields, clear air, and quiet paths make it easy to capture tranquil landscapes, so I usually spend more time shooting there.

提案: Begin with a direct answer and give specific reasons with linking words. Avoid vague phrases like "new thing"; instead name examples (architecture, food, landscapes). Fix grammar ("other countries are better" or "I prefer views in other countries").

例: I prefer views in other countries because they often offer different architecture and landscapes. For example, I enjoy photographing foreign markets and historic buildings since they show cultures and environments I haven't seen at home.

× When I take the pictures it will make me happy and I will keep it on my phone to become a good memories.

✓ When I take pictures, it makes me happy and I keep them on my phone as good memories.

Errors: 'take the pictures' uses unnecessary definite article and plural/pronoun mismatch; 'will make' and 'will keep' use future but context is habitual so present simple is correct; 'it' should be 'they' to refer to pictures (pronoun agreement); 'to become a good memories' is incorrect phrase—use 'as good memories'. Suggestion: Use present simple for habitual actions, match pronouns to plural nouns, remove unnecessary articles and use 'as' to express purpose or result. Grammar problem type ID:10

× I prefer to take pictures in rural areas because in rural areas the environment is very good.

✓ I prefer taking pictures in rural areas because the environment there is very good.

Errors: Repetition 'in rural areas' twice is redundant; 'prefer to take pictures' can be more natural as 'prefer taking pictures'; 'the environment is very good' is fine but add 'there' for clarity. Suggestion: Avoid repetition, use gerund after 'prefer' for general preference, and add locative adverb for naturalness. Grammar problem type ID:14

× It's very green, clean and fresh and it's quiet and so many good feel we can see over there.

✓ It's very green, clean, and fresh. It's quiet, and there are many pleasant things we can see there.

Errors: 'so many good feel' is ungrammatical; likely intended 'many pleasant things' or 'good views'; sentence run-on should be split; 'there are' is needed to introduce plural noun 'many pleasant things'. Suggestion: Use appropriate adjectives ('pleasant') and correct existential construction 'there are' when mentioning things we can see. Grammar problem type ID:13

× I think other countries better because it's really different from our own country.

✓ I think other countries are better because they are really different from our own country.

Errors: Missing verb 'are' after 'other countries'; pronoun 'it' incorrectly refers to plural 'countries'—use 'they'. Suggestion: Ensure subject-verb agreement with plural subjects and use correct pronouns for plurality. Grammar problem type ID:6

× We can see the new thing over there.

✓ We can see new things there.

Errors: 'the new thing' sounds odd and too specific; plural 'new things' fits general observation; 'over there' can be simplified to 'there'. Suggestion: Use plural when referring to various unspecified items and avoid unnecessary articles. Grammar problem type ID:13

× We can find new situation, new environment that we never had before.

✓ We can find new situations and new environments that we have never had before.

Errors: Countable nouns 'situation' and 'environment' need plural forms ('situations', 'environments') when speaking generally; missing 'have' for present perfect 'have never had' to show experience up to now; include 'and' to connect items. Suggestion: Use plural for general statements and present perfect for life experiences that include up to the present. Grammar problem type ID:13