School— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: 文法の誤り（例えば、単数・複数の一致）を修正し、より自然な表現を使うことをお勧めします。また、回答は簡潔にし、冗長な部分を避けましょう。

例: My school is Cal University, which has three campuses: two in Kanagawa and one in Tokyo.

提案: 同じフレーズの繰り返しを避け、より具体的な理由や感情を加えて回答を豊かにしましょう。また、文の繋がりを意識して自然な流れを作ることが重要です。

例: Yes, I like my school because it offers a friendly environment where I can make many friends and focus on my studies effectively.

提案: 接続詞を使って文の流れをスムーズにし、文法的な誤りを修正しましょう。また、具体的な例を加えると説得力が増します。

例: Yes, I do. First of all, the teachers are very supportive and encourage us to study hard. Moreover, if we achieve high grades and English test scores, we have the opportunity to study abroad.

提案: 文法の誤りを直し、より具体的で明確な表現を使いましょう。また、接続詞を使って文をつなげ、論理的な流れを作ることが大切です。

例: Firstly, many students work very hard at their studies. Secondly, we can easily ask questions to teachers, which helps us stay motivated.

提案: 「study about it」という表現は不自然なので、「study it」や「study hard」などに修正しましょう。また、理由をもう少し具体的に説明すると良いです。

例: Interest is very important because when you are interested in a subject, you are more motivated and can study it more effectively.

× My school is Cal University, my school has three campus.

✓ My school is Cal University, my school has three campuses.

The word 'campus' is countable and should be pluralized as 'campuses' when referring to more than one. This is a singular and plural issue.

× Two of them is in Kanagawa and 1 is in Tokyo.

✓ Two of them are in Kanagawa and one is in Tokyo.

The subject 'Two of them' is plural, so the verb should be 'are' instead of 'is'. Also, '1' should be written as 'one' in formal speech. This is a singular and plural issue.

× Yes I do. I like my school because I can make many friends in my school and I can study hard. In my school.

✓ Yes, I do. I like my school because I can make many friends and study hard there.

The phrase 'In my school' at the end is redundant and awkward. Combining the ideas into one sentence improves clarity and flow. This is a sentence structure error.

× First of all teachers are very supportive to study hard.

✓ First of all, teachers are very supportive in helping us study hard.

The phrase 'supportive to study hard' is incorrect. The correct preposition is 'in' when indicating support in an activity. This is an incorrect use of prepositions.

× Second we can study abroad if we get high score in grade and English test.

✓ Second, we can study abroad if we get high scores in grades and English tests.

'Score', 'grade', and 'test' should be pluralized to 'scores', 'grades', and 'tests' because they refer to multiple assessments. This is a singular and plural issue.

× First, there are many people who do something very hard.

✓ First, there are many people who work very hard.

The phrase 'do something very hard' is awkward and unclear. 'Work very hard' is a natural expression. This is a sentence structure error.

× Second, you can we can easily ask some questions to teachers so we can stay motivated.

✓ Second, we can easily ask teachers questions so we can stay motivated.

The phrase 'you can we can' is redundant and incorrect. Also, 'ask some questions to teachers' should be 'ask teachers questions'. This is a sentence structure error.

× Interest is very important because if you are interested in something, you can study about it very hard.

✓ Interest is very important because if you are interested in something, you can study it very hard.

The verb 'study' does not require the preposition 'about'. Using 'study about' is incorrect. This is an incorrect use of prepositions.