Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more concise and confident. Start with a clear topic sentence, reduce filler words (umm), correct minor grammar (use past simple consistently), and provide one specific supporting detail. Aim for 2–3 sentences and use a linking phrase to connect ideas.

例: I don't think I had a bike when I was a child. Instead, I preferred roller skating and even bought a pair because I found it more fun and social for playing with my friends in the neighborhood.

提案: Answer directly and avoid hesitations. Correct word choice (ride, not write) and be specific about why bikes are popular. Use a linking word to add a personal comment or reason. Keep to 2–3 sentences.

例: Yes, bikes are very popular, especially for riding along the Han River because the paths are scenic and well maintained. For example, I often cycle there on weekends because it is relaxing and a good way to exercise.

× Umm, well I don't remember well, but I don't think so because umm, I enjoyed umm, I enjoyed roller skating umm more than a bike, so I bought a a roller skate instead.

✓ Umm, well I don't remember clearly, but I don't think so because I enjoyed roller skating more than biking, so I bought roller skates instead.

Issues: unnecessary repetition, awkward adverb use and inconsistent noun forms. Use present tense 'don't remember' with clearer adverb 'clearly'. Replace repeated phrase 'I enjoyed' with a single instance. Use 'biking' as the standard gerund for riding a bike and plural 'roller skates' for the item normally owned. Remove duplicated 'a'. Suggestion: simplify and choose consistent noun/verb forms to improve fluency.

× Yeah, I think people enjoy, uh, writing a bike in a Hangang Han river because, uh, it's nice to, uh, take a bike, uh, along the river.

✓ Yeah, I think people enjoy riding a bike along the Han River because it's nice to ride along the river.

Problems: incorrect verb 'writing' should be 'riding'; incorrect preposition 'in' with 'river' should be 'along' for following the river path; redundant article 'a' before 'Hangang Han river' and awkward naming—use 'the Han River'. Also streamline repetition. Suggestion: use 'ride/ride a bike' and the preposition 'along' for cycling beside a river, and include 'the' before named rivers.

× And I really enjoy it too.

✓ I really enjoy it too.

Minor style issue: starting a short answer with 'And' is informal and unnecessary. The tense is correct. Suggestion: omit 'And' for more natural, concise speech.