Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Make the answer more natural and concise. Start with a clear topic sentence, correct tense mistakes, avoid redundancy, and add one specific supporting detail. Use linking words for coherence.

例: Yes. I had my first bike when I was about eight. My father taught me how to balance and pedal, and after a few afternoons of practice I could ride confidently around our neighborhood.

提案: Give a direct topic sentence, then add a specific reason or example and use a linking word to connect ideas. Avoid vague phrases and repetition.

例: Yes, bikes are very popular in my country, especially in big cities like Shanghai. For example, many people use shared bikes for short trips because they are cheap and help avoid traffic, so you see them everywhere during rush hour.

× Sure, I've got a bike when I was about 8 years old and it was the first time that I rode on a bike and my father assisted me about the ways to ride a bike.

✓ Sure, I got a bike when I was about 8 years old; it was the first time I rode a bike, and my father helped me learn how to ride.

ID 6: Present tense issue and ID 5: Past tense issue. The original mixes present perfect ('I've got') with a specific past time ('when I was about 8 years old'), which requires simple past ('I got'). Also 'assisted me about the ways to ride a bike' is awkward and non-idiomatic; use simple past 'helped me' and the correct verb pattern 'learn how to ride' or 'teach me how to ride'. Use of semicolon and commas improves sentence structure and clarity.

× Yes, of course. Bikes are extremely popular in our country, especially in Shanghai where I live in.

✓ Yes, of course. Bikes are extremely popular in our country, especially in Shanghai, where I live.

ID 11: Incorrect use of prepositions and ID 26: Sentence structure errors. The original ends with an unnecessary preposition 'in' after 'live'. The relative clause should be 'where I live.' Adding a comma before the relative clause improves readability.