Sharing— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: 回答时应避免语法错误和表达不清，如“making friends with them”应改为“how to make friends with them”，并且句子结构应更自然流畅。建议简化句子，避免重复，增强表达的连贯性。

例: Yes, absolutely. My parents taught me how to share with other children and how this helps in making friends. I believe sharing is important because it builds good relationships and benefits everyone involved.

提案: 回答中存在语法错误和表达不清，如“new events on in the cities”应为“new events in the city”，且句子较长且重复。建议使用更准确的词汇和简洁的句子结构。

例: I like to share food and interesting news with my friends. For instance, if I discover new events happening in the city or try new snacks, I always share these experiences with them.

提案: 回答中有重复和语法错误，如“brush, uh, toothbrushes”应简化为“toothbrushes”，并且句子应更连贯。建议减少口头语，使用更准确的表达。

例: Personal belongings such as toothbrushes and earrings are not suitable for sharing because it can be unhygienic and unsafe.

提案: 回答不完整且有语法错误，如“they are so”未完成句子，且重复“could you could you”。建议回答时保持句子完整，避免重复和口头语。

例: Recently, I shared some tasty snacks like chocolate with my friends, and they really enjoyed them. I also often share interesting news with them to keep our conversations lively.

提案: 回答较好，但可以增加连接词使句子更流畅。建议适当使用连接词如“because”、“so”来增强逻辑性。

例: The first person I would share good news with is definitely my best friend Jackie because we have known each other since college and he is very supportive. I enjoy talking with him, so I always choose to share my happiness with him.

提案: 回答不完整且表达不清，如“Also beside that, if we have bad news”未完成句子。建议回答时保持句子完整，避免口头语，使用更准确的表达。

例: I share both good and bad news with my friends to stay connected. For example, we talk about new events in our city and plan to attend parties together. We also support each other when something bad happens.

× They taught me how to share with other kids and making friends with them.

✓ They taught me how to share with other kids and make friends with them.

这里的动词结构应该保持一致，前面是不定式短语（how to share），后面也应该用动词原形（make），而不是动名词（making）。

× I think that's important for many kids because learning how to share with friends and can make a lot of benefits for them.

✓ I think that's important for many kids because learning how to share with friends can bring a lot of benefits for them.

句中“learning how to share with friends and can make a lot of benefits”结构不完整，缺少主语或连接词，且“make a lot of benefits”表达不自然，应改为“bring a lot of benefits”。

× Well, I like to share foods and some interesting things, uh, with others.

✓ Well, I like to share food and some interesting things, uh, with others.

“food”作为不可数名词，通常不加复数形式“foods”。

× when I learn some new events on in the cities, I will definitely share with my friends this news and something like if I have a new snacks, I will share with my friends if they are fantastic.

✓ when I learn about some new events in the cities, I will definitely share this news with my friends, and if I have new snacks, I will share them with my friends if they are fantastic.

“learn events on in the cities”中“on”多余，应改为“learn about events in the cities”。“share with my friends this news”语序不自然，应改为“share this news with my friends”。“a new snacks”数量不匹配，应去掉冠词“a”。

× if I have a new snacks, I will share with my friends if they are fantastic.

✓ if I have new snacks, I will share them with my friends if they are fantastic.

“snacks”是复数，前面不应加不定冠词“a”，且“share with my friends”后应加宾语“them”。

× I won't share brush, uh, toothbrushes with my, with others because that is not, uh, that is not healthy.

✓ I won't share my toothbrush with others because that is not healthy.

“share brush, uh, toothbrushes with my, with others”表达混乱，应明确为“share my toothbrush with others”。

× And also something like personal belongings, like earrings is not, uh, it's not safe when you share this to others.

✓ And also, personal belongings like earrings are not safe to share with others.

“earrings”是复数，谓语应用复数“are”。“share this to others”搭配错误，应为“share with others”。

× I have a lot of things to share with others, such as I share tasty snacks with my friends and they always love that chocolate so much.

✓ I have a lot of things to share with others, such as tasty snacks that I share with my friends, and they always love that chocolate so much.

“such as I share tasty snacks”结构不自然，应改为“such as tasty snacks that I share”。

× They often say that could you could you give me more?

✓ They often say, "Could you give me more?"

直接引语中重复“could you”不正确，应简化为“Could you give me more?”并加引号。

× And I often share some interesting news to my friends and they are so.

✓ And I often share some interesting news with my friends, and they enjoy it.

“share news to”搭配错误，应为“share news with”。句尾“and they are so”不完整，应补充完整表达。

× The first person I would like to share with good news is definitely my best friend Jackie.

✓ The first person I would like to share good news with is definitely my best friend Jackie.

“share with good news”语序错误，应为“share good news with”。

× We have known each other since we were in college and he is really supportive.

✓ We have known each other since we were in college, and he is really supportive.

此句无明显语法错误，但加逗号更符合书面表达。

× I enjoy talking with him because he knows me well, so I would definitely choose to share my happiness with him.

✓ I enjoy talking to him because he knows me well, so I would definitely choose to share my happiness with him.

“talking with”与“talking to”均可，但“talking to”更常用且更自然。

× Well, I'd like to share a lot of news, like either good news or bad news because I would like to keep up with them and something like if we have new events in our cities and we would plan to go there and enjoy the party there.

✓ Well, I'd like to share a lot of news, both good and bad, because I would like to keep up with them. For example, if we have new events in our cities, we would plan to go there and enjoy the party.

句子过长且结构混乱，应拆分为两句，且“like either good news or bad news”表达不自然，改为“both good and bad”。

× Also beside that, if we have bad news.

✓ Also, besides that, if we have bad news, ...

“beside”应为“besides”，且句子不完整，应补充完整表达。