Science— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more concise and correct grammar. Start with a clear topic sentence, correct subject-verb agreement, reduce fillers (uh), and give one or two specific supporting details. Use linking words like 'however' properly.

例: Yes, I enjoyed studying science at school. It was divided into biology, chemistry and physics; I was especially good at physics, but I struggled with chemistry. However, I enjoyed the challenges because experiments helped me understand concepts better.

提案: Clarify and correct tense and phrasing. Begin with a direct statement, then give one or two specific daily examples showing how science helps your work. Avoid vague generalizations and incorrect grammar ('used' → 'use', 'it you couldn't' etc.).

例: Yes, I use scientific knowledge every day. For example, working with computers requires basic electronics and logical problem-solving, and understanding software principles helps me manage tasks efficiently.

提案: Be concise and precise. State the subject you want to learn and give a clear reason with correct grammar. Avoid redundant or confusing phrases ('made which would make me not to get a knowledge'). Use linking words like 'because' to explain reasons.

例: I would like to learn more biology in the future because I'm curious about microorganisms and how they affect health and the environment. Studying microbiology would help me understand disease prevention and biotechnology applications.

提案: Give a clear opinion with structured supporting reasons and correct grammar. Start with a direct statement, then provide one or two specific reasons (e.g., critical thinking, career options). Avoid trailing off and filler words.

例: Yes, I think everyone should study science because it develops critical thinking and problem-solving skills. Additionally, science knowledge opens up many career opportunities in fields like engineering, medicine and technology.

提案: Make the response fluent and grammatically correct. Give a concise statement about past and present preference and one specific example of a hands-on activity you prefer. Use linking words like 'however' or 'now' to show change.

例: I used to enjoy watching science programs when I was studying, but now I prefer doing hands-on experiments. For example, I like building simple electronics projects to learn by doing rather than just watching TV.

× The science were divided into 3 parts, biology, chemistry and physics.

✓ The science was divided into three parts: biology, chemistry and physics.

Subject 'science' is singular, so use singular 'was'. Also write numbers under ten as words and use a colon to introduce a list.

× To be honest I was good in physics, however I wasn't uh that good in the chemistry.

✓ To be honest, I was good at physics; however, I wasn't that good at chemistry.

Use 'good at' not 'good in'. Remove unnecessary article 'the' before subjects. Use past tense consistently and punctuation to link clauses.

× So overall I enjoyed it and faced the challenge at school.

✓ So overall, I enjoyed it and faced challenges at school.

Use plural 'challenges' or rephrase for naturalness. Add comma after 'overall' and adjust noun number to match general statement.

× I believe everyone used the science knowledge daily.

✓ I believe everyone uses scientific knowledge daily.

Present simple 'uses' fits the general habitual meaning. Use 'scientific knowledge' (more natural) and avoid past tense 'used'.

× In my case, I work with the computers, I have to manage my task.

✓ In my case, I work with computers; I have to manage my tasks.

Do not use 'the' before 'computers' unless specific. Use plural 'tasks' for general responsibilities. Use appropriate punctuation between clauses.

× Without the science knowledge, I won't be able to do any of the task.

✓ Without scientific knowledge, I wouldn't be able to do any of the tasks.

Use 'scientific knowledge' and conditional 'wouldn't' for hypothetical present/future. Use plural 'tasks' and drop 'the'.

× Today's reality is the on the dependent of science.

✓ Today's reality depends on science.

Original is ungrammatical. Use subject-verb structure 'X depends on Y' to express dependence.

× Without that it you couldn't survive.

✓ Without it, you couldn't survive.

Remove redundant pronoun 'that' or 'it'; place comma after introductory clause. Use correct word order.

× That's an interesting question.

✓ That's an interesting question.

No correction needed; sentence is grammatically correct.

× When I was in high school, I had to choose between biology and mathematics.

✓ When I was in high school, I had to choose between biology and mathematics.

Sentence is correct in past context; no change necessary.

× At that time I preferred mathematics.

✓ At that time, I preferred mathematics.

Add comma after introductory phrase; tense 'preferred' is appropriate for past preference.

× However, in the future, if I would get a chance, I would definitely explore the biology subject which made which would make me not to get a knowledge about the microorganisms.

✓ However, in the future, if I get a chance, I will definitely explore biology, which would allow me to gain knowledge about microorganisms.

Use zero/first conditional: 'if I get' + 'I will'. Remove redundant 'subject' after 'biology'. Use 'allow me to gain knowledge' or 'learn about' instead of 'make me not to get a knowledge'.

× Definitely, science must be uh, an important subject at the school.

✓ Definitely, science must be an important subject at school.

Omit 'the' before 'school' for general statements. Remove filler 'uh'.

× Everyone must learn the science.

✓ Everyone should learn science.

'Must' is very strong; 'should' is more natural for recommendation. Drop 'the' before 'science'.

× First of all, one can get a better job opportunities in the future.

✓ First of all, one can get better job opportunities in the future.

Do not mix singular article 'a' with plural 'opportunities'. Remove 'a' and keep plural noun.

× However, I saw it in my high school that 90% of the students were learning science.

✓ However, I saw at my high school that 90% of the students were studying science.

Use 'at my high school' not 'in my high school'. 'Studying' is more natural than 'learning' in this context.

× Others were interested in the.

✓ Others were interested in other subjects.

Original sentence ends abruptly and lacks an object. Provide a suitable noun phrase 'other subjects' to complete the sentence.

× In the past when I was studying science, I liked to watch the science program.

✓ In the past, when I was studying science, I liked to watch science programs.

Use plural 'programs' for general habit, remove 'the' before 'science program'.

× With the time, I believe that I lost my interest of watching science program.

✓ Over time, I believe I lost my interest in watching science programs.

Use 'over time' for gradual change, 'lost my interest in' is the correct preposition, and plural 'programs' for general reference.

× Instead. I always try to make to play with the science experiments in the real life instead of watching.

✓ Instead, I always try to do science experiments in real life rather than just watching them.

Fix sentence fragments and awkward phrasing: 'do science experiments' and 'in real life' are natural; use 'rather than just watching them' to contrast actions.