Birthday— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: 你的回答有些重复和语法错误，影响了表达的清晰度。建议简化句子结构，避免重复，并且注意时态和冠词的使用。可以多用连接词使句子更连贯。

例: I usually celebrate my birthday by going to a restaurant with my friends. For example, last year we spent the day at an Italian restaurant, and they gave me presents that I really liked.

提案: 回答中存在语法错误和表达不清晰的问题，建议使用正确的时态和句型，避免重复词汇，并且使句子更简洁流畅。

例: When I was young, I didn't celebrate my birthday specially. I usually spent the day with my friends, riding bicycles around the neighborhood. Sometimes, people would wish me a happy birthday, which made me feel encouraged.

提案: 表达不够清晰，句子结构混乱，建议理清思路，使用简单明了的句子表达自己的观点，并解释原因。

例: I don't think celebrating my birthday is very important. In the past, I had some difficult experiences on my birthday, so I didn't enjoy celebrating it for a long time.

提案: 回答中有语法错误和重复，建议简化句子，注意主谓一致和句子完整性，同时使用连接词使表达更流畅。

例: In China, we usually think that celebrating the elderly people's birthdays is very important. For example, my family always goes to a restaurant to celebrate my grandma's birthday and gives her some simple gifts.

× I usually go to a restaurant with my friends to celebrate my birthday and they get they always give me a birthday party and give me the present that I like it.

✓ I usually go to a restaurant with my friends to celebrate my birthday, and they always give me a birthday party and give me the present that I like.

句子中出现了多余的动词形式“get they”，这是不正确的现在分词用法，应该去掉多余部分，使句子通顺。

× last year we spent a day in a Italian restaurant and it's.

✓ Last year we spent a day in an Italian restaurant.

“Italian”以元音音素开头，前面应该用不定冠词“an”而不是“a”，且句子末尾“and it's”不完整，应删除。

× I spent the time with my friend and riding the bike and rode a bicycle all around.

✓ I spent time with my friends, riding a bike and rode a bicycle all around.

“friend”应为复数形式“friends”，因为通常和朋友们一起活动；“the bike”应为不定冠词“a bike”，表示泛指。

× I spent the time with my friend and riding the bike and rode a bicycle all around.

✓ I spent time with my friends, riding a bike and rode a bicycle all around.

“riding”作为现在分词用法正确，但前后时态搭配需调整，使句子更流畅。

× Or even just tell someone on birthday and they will give me a birthday sentence that encourage me.

✓ Or even just tell someone on their birthday and they will give me a birthday message that encourages me.

“someone on birthday”缺少所有格，应为“someone on their birthday”；“sentence”用词不当，应为“message”；“encourage”需加第三人称单数形式“encourages”。

× Actually, I don't think it's very important to celebrate my birthday because I have a nice experience for my birthday.

✓ Actually, I don't think it's very important to celebrate my birthday because I don't have a nice experience on my birthday.

句意应为没有好的生日经历，原句时态和表达不符，需改为否定形式。

× So when I mentioned about the birthday, it made me feel hard to cross.

✓ So when I mention my birthday, it makes me feel hard to accept.

“mentioned about”用法错误，应为“mention”；“hard to cross”表达不当，应为“hard to accept”或“difficult to accept”。

× So I didn't like to celebrate my birthday for a long time but restlessly.

✓ So I haven't liked to celebrate my birthday for a long time, but reluctantly.

“didn't like”与“for a long time”搭配不当，应该用现在完成时“haven't liked”；“restlessly”用词错误，应为“reluctantly”（不情愿地）。

× I think the elderly people's birthday is most we like to celebrate.

✓ I think the elderly people's birthdays are the ones we like to celebrate most.

“birthday”应为复数“birthdays”，且句子结构需调整使语义清晰。

× For example, when my grandma when grandma's birthday, we usually my family always go to the restaurant and celebrate for grandma's birthday and give her some gifts or give some simply.

✓ For example, when it's my grandma's birthday, my family usually goes to a restaurant to celebrate and give her some gifts or something simple.

句子结构混乱，重复“when grandma”，缺少主谓一致，动词形式错误，“give some simply”表达不完整，应为“give her some gifts or something simple”。