Teacher— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Your answer is clear, relevant and uses good detail. To improve, start with a concise topic sentence naming the teacher and then add one or two specific examples with linking words (for example, "for instance" or "because") to make it more coherent. Also vary vocabulary (e.g., use "encouraged" / "motivated" / "supported") and keep responses within four sentences to avoid slight redundancy.

例: My favourite teacher was my high school biology teacher. For example, she motivated shy students by encouraging participation and using humor and real-life examples, which made lessons engaging and easier to understand. Because she was patient, we always felt comfortable asking questions and learning from our mistakes.

提案: Good direct response and explanation. To improve, make the reply more concise and use linking words to show sequence (e.g., "at that time", "later"). Avoid repeating negatives ("not" and "not still"). Add a brief closing sentence about whether you would like to reconnect to enrich the answer.

例: No, I'm not in touch with my primary school teacher. At that time I didn't have a smartphone and my parents handled school communications, and later I only exchanged contact details with my middle school teachers. I would like to reconnect if possible to thank them for their support.

提案: Strong, specific examples and clear outcome. Improve by combining short sentences with linking words (e.g., "as a result", "which led to") and correcting small phrasing issues ("at one contest" instead of "at once contest"). Keep it to three or four sentences for fluency.

例: My favourite teacher supported me by encouraging me to enter science competitions and praising my progress. As a result, my confidence grew and I delivered a short presentation at one contest, which made me more comfortable speaking in public and more willing to participate in class.

提案: Clear opinion and reasons. To improve, begin with a concise topic sentence and then support it with two linked reasons using connectors like "because" and "so". You could add a brief mention of what kind of career you prefer instead to give more depth.

例: No, I don't want to be a teacher in the future because managing a classroom and being responsible for many students seems very challenging. Also, the heavy workload and constant discipline issues would be stressful, so I prefer a career with more predictable hours, such as a research or office-based role.

× Yes, my favorite teacher was my high school biology teacher.

✓ Yes, my favorite teacher was my high school biology teacher.

No correction needed; sentence is grammatical. (Included to show no article error.)

× She helped me gain confidence by encouraging participation and using humor and real life examples to make lessons engaging.

✓ She helped me gain confidence by encouraging participation and using humor and real-life examples to make lessons engaging.

Hyphenation of 'real-life' is required when using it as a compound modifier before a noun. This is a punctuation/word-formation issue rather than a core grammar rule, but it improves clarity. Suggest always hyphenate compound adjectives before nouns.

× She was also very patient so we always felt comfortable asking her questions.

✓ She was also very patient, so we always felt comfortable asking her questions.

A coordinating conjunction (so) joining two independent clauses should be preceded by a comma. Add a comma before 'so' to correctly connect the clauses.

× Actually, no, I'm not still in touch with my primary school teacher.

✓ Actually, no, I'm not still in touch with my primary school teacher.

Sentence is grammatical though slightly awkward. For naturalness, use 'I'm not still in touch' -> 'I'm not still in touch' is acceptable; better: 'I'm not still in touch with my primary school teacher' or 'I'm no longer in touch with my primary school teacher.' The latter is recommended for clarity.

× Back then, I didn't have a smartphone and my parents were the ones who communicated with the school.

✓ Back then, I didn't have a smartphone, and my parents were the ones who communicated with the school.

Add a comma before 'and' joining two independent clauses for correct punctuation. Tense usage is correct.

× And when I got a phone in middle school, I only exchanged contact details with my middle school teachers.

✓ When I got a phone in middle school, I only exchanged contact details with my middle school teachers.

Avoid beginning a sentence with 'And' in formal speech; remove it for cleaner writing. Otherwise tense and structure are correct.

× When I was in high school, my favorite teacher supported me a lot.

✓ When I was in high school, my favorite teacher supported me a lot.

Sentence is grammatical; definite article use is correct. No change needed.

× She encouraged me to enter science competitions and praised my progress.

✓ She encouraged me to enter science competitions and praised my progress.

Grammatically correct; verbs are correctly used in simple past to describe past actions. No change needed.

× This praise boosted my confidence.

✓ This praise boosted my confidence.

Correct past tense usage; no change needed.

× I even delivered a short presentation at once contest, which made me more comfortable speaking in public and willing to ask questions and take part actively in class.

✓ I even delivered a short presentation at one contest, which made me more comfortable speaking in public and more willing to ask questions and take part actively in class.

'Once' is incorrect here; the correct quantifier is 'one' to mean a single contest. Also add 'more' before 'willing' for parallel comparison with 'more comfortable.' Suggest proofreading for wrong homophones and ensuring parallel structure.

× Actually, no. Although teaching is a respected and stable profession in China, I don't want to be a teacher because I find managing a classroom and being responsible for every student quite challenging.

✓ Actually, no. Although teaching is a respected and stable profession in China, I don't want to be a teacher because I find managing a classroom and being responsible for every student quite challenging.

Sentence is grammatically correct; modal verb 'don't' is used properly. No change needed.

× I think the workload and the need to handle discipline would be stressful for me.

✓ I think the workload and the need to handle discipline would be stressful for me.

Grammatical; 'to handle' complements 'need' correctly. No change needed.