Dreams— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Cevabınızda bazı dilbilgisi hataları ve tekrarlar var. Daha doğal ve akıcı bir İngilizce için cümlenizi daha kısa ve net yapmalısınız. Ayrıca, 'sometimes' kelimesini iki kez kullanmak yerine, farklı bağlaçlar kullanarak cümlenizi çeşitlendirebilirsiniz.

例: Sometimes I remember my dreams clearly, especially when they have a special meaning for me. However, other times, I forget them soon after waking up.

提案: Cümleniz biraz karışık ve dilbilgisi hataları içeriyor. Daha açık ve mantıklı bir yapı kullanmalısınız. Ayrıca, bağlaçlar ve zamirlerin doğru kullanımı ile cümlenizi daha anlaşılır hale getirebilirsiniz.

例: I usually share my dreams with others because I am curious about their opinions, although I am not very interested in hearing about their dreams.

提案: Dilbilgisi ve kelime kullanımı üzerinde çalışmalısınız. 'Hasn't' yerine 'don't have' kullanmalısınız ve cümlenizi daha açık hale getirmek için bağlaçlar eklemelisiniz. Ayrıca, 'news' kelimesi yerine 'experiences' daha uygun olur.

例: I believe that some dreams have special meanings, while others do not. This is because our brain connects with the experiences we have in daily life.

提案: Cümlenizde zaman uyumsuzluğu var. 'Worked' yerine 'work' kullanmalısınız. Ayrıca, cümlenizi biraz daha detaylandırarak daha etkili yapabilirsiniz.

例: Of course, I want to make my dreams come true, and I work hard every day to achieve happiness.

× Sometimes I remember the dreams I had, but sometimes I don't remember that dream.

✓ Sometimes I remember the dreams I had, but sometimes I don't remember those dreams.

The sentence incorrectly mixes singular 'that dream' with plural 'dreams'. Since 'dreams' is plural, the pronoun should also be plural 'those dreams' to maintain agreement.

× maybe the the dreams that I remember has a special meaning for me, so that's why I remember those dreams.

✓ maybe the dreams that I remember have a special meaning for me, so that's why I remember those dreams.

The subject 'dreams' is plural, so the verb should be 'have' instead of 'has' to agree in number.

× I'm not interested in others dreams, but I often share my dreams with others because I wonder what will their answers, what will their thoughts of my dreams and I went to their comments of my big dreams.

✓ I'm not interested in others' dreams, but I often share my dreams with others because I wonder what their answers will be, what their thoughts are about my dreams, and I pay attention to their comments on my big dreams.

The phrase 'others dreams' lacks the possessive apostrophe, it should be 'others' dreams'. Also, the sentence structure is awkward and some pronouns and verb forms are incorrect or misplaced, so corrections improve clarity and grammar.

× I believe that some dreams have special meanings, but some of them hasn't a special meanings.

✓ I believe that some dreams have special meanings, but some of them don't have special meanings.

The phrase 'some of them hasn't a special meanings' is incorrect because 'some' is plural and requires 'don't have' instead of 'has'. Also, 'meanings' should be plural without 'a'.

× It's because your brain connection connecting with the news that you lived in your daily life.

✓ It's because your brain connects with the news that you experience in your daily life.

The phrase 'brain connection connecting with the news' is awkward and incorrect. 'Connects with' is the correct verb-preposition combination. Also, 'lived in your daily life' is better expressed as 'experience in your daily life'.

× Of course I want to make my dreams come true and I worked hard for happiness.

✓ Of course I want to make my dreams come true and I work hard for happiness.

The sentence mixes present tense 'want' with past tense 'worked'. Since the desire is ongoing, 'work' in present tense is appropriate.