Dreams— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: 回答中存在语法错误和表达不自然的问题，建议使用正确的时态和更自然的表达方式，同时避免重复词汇。

例: Yes, I remember that when I was a child, I wanted to be a teacher because our English teacher was very beautiful and professional. I thought it was a wonderful profession.

提案: 回答中语法和表达不清晰，建议使用正确的句型表达分享梦想的好处，并且避免语义模糊。

例: Yes, I often share my dreams with others because it helps me get encouragement and support. Also, I enjoy learning about other people's dreams.

提案: 回答中表达不够连贯，建议使用连接词使句子更流畅，并且具体说明梦的象征意义。

例: Yes, I believe some dreams have special meanings. For instance, dreaming of becoming a nurse or doctor symbolizes a desire to help people in need, which is very admirable.

提案: 回答中存在语法错误和表达不自然，建议使用更准确的表达方式描述努力实现梦想的过程。

例: Yes, I want to make my dreams come true, so I work hard every day. I get up early, practice regularly, and motivate myself to achieve my goals.

× I think dream is not only my sins.

✓ I think dreams are not only my sins.

dream是可数名词，表示“梦想”，应使用复数形式dreams。sins应为dreams的误写，可能想表达的是“梦想”，应改为dreams。

× so I want to be her.

✓ so I want to be like her.

这里想表达“我想成为像她那样的人”，不能直接用her作宾语，应使用like her表示“像她”。

× I think it is very wonderful thing.

✓ I think it is a very wonderful thing.

wonderful是形容词，修饰thing时需要冠词a。缺少冠词导致表达不完整。

× If I told my dream with others, I will gain more encouragement to complete it of what's more I'm also interested in.

✓ If I share my dream with others, I will gain more encouragement to complete it; what's more, I'm also interested in others' dreams.

told my dream with others用法错误，应使用share my dream with others。句子结构混乱，需分句并补充others' dreams表达“我也对别人的梦想感兴趣”。

× I think a dream, some dreams symbolize a great meaning.

✓ I think some dreams symbolize a great meaning.

句子中同时使用a dream和some dreams，表达重复且不连贯，应去掉a dream，保持复数形式。

× For example, nurse or to be a nurse or doctor that means to help more people when they are in trouble.

✓ For example, being a nurse or a doctor means helping more people when they are in trouble.

表达职业时应使用动名词being，且doctor前缺少冠词a。means后应接动名词helping。

× It is very outstanding.

✓ It is very admirable.

outstanding通常用来形容人或事物的突出表现，这里表达“很了不起”更合适用admirable。

× I want to make my dream come true in every second, so I make no pains to complete it.

✓ I want to make my dream come true every second, so I spare no pains to complete it.

in every second用法不当，应去掉in。make no pains是错误表达，应为spare no pains，意为“不遗余力”。

× do some practice and inspire myself to achieve it.

✓ do some practice and motivate myself to achieve it.

inspire myself用法不当，inspire通常用于激励他人，自己激励自己应使用motivate myself。