Emails— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: 需要改进语法准确性、句子连贯性和词汇使用。回答应更直接并使用简洁明确的主题句，避免重复。具体可注意：1) 时态和主谓一致（e-mail 后用单数或复数时注意动词形式）；2) 修正比较级错误（more faster → faster 或 more convenient）；3) 用连词更自然地连接句子（e.g. However, for formal matters, people still use email）；4) 限制答案长度在最多五个句子内，保持信息清晰。

例: I don't often use email because for informal conversations I prefer WeChat or QQ, which are faster and more convenient. However, I still use email for formal matters such as job applications or official correspondence.

提案: 需要增强表达的逻辑和语法准确性，并提供更具体的情境。具体改进点：1) 先给出直接回答的主题句（I would send emails when...）；2) 用正确的从句结构（e.g. when I cannot contact professors personally）；3) 避免填充词和重复（删除“so so”）；4) 补充一两个具体例子或原因，使内容更具体。

例: I would send an email when applying for a job or contacting university professors I cannot reach in person. For example, I might email a professor to ask about research opportunities or to request a recommendation for my application.

提案: 需要提高句子流畅性和准确性，避免重复并清晰区分人群。具体建议：1) 用一句话陈述总体观点（Yes/No），然后用一两句具体解释；2) 注意修饰词的位置和搭配（very popular），并用清晰的分句说明不同年龄段的使用习惯；3) 用连接词（However, while, for example）使逻辑更清楚。

例: Yes, email is still fairly popular in China, especially for formal matters. Younger people tend to use WeChat or QQ for informal chats, while older adults and professionals often rely on email for official communication such as job applications.

提案: 改进意见：增强表达的理由性、修正语法和词序，并避免重复表达“I think”。具体建议：1) 用清晰的预测句（I believe email will remain or become more popular）；2) 提供逻辑性强的理由并用连接词（because, therefore）；3) 修正不自然的短语（guide the admission → contact admissions or apply for admission）；4) 保持句子精炼，不超过五句。

例: I believe email will remain important in the future because many people will still need it for job applications and university admissions. For instance, applicants often email admissions officers or professors to ask about application requirements or to submit documents.

× Now I don't often use e-mail because for informal conversations using WeChat or QQ is more faster and convenient.

✓ Now I don't often use e-mail because for informal conversations using WeChat or QQ is faster and more convenient.

句中比较级用法错误。“more faster”是冗余且不正确的，应该用“faster”或“more convenient”。在两个并列形容词前使用“faster and more convenient”或“more convenient and faster”。建议：如果两个形容词都需要比较级，分别使用正确形式（faster, more convenient）；避免在 already comparative 的词前再加 more。

× But for some formal con conversations we still use e-mail, but it don't often.

✓ But for some formal conversations we still use e-mail, but we don't often.

原句中主语是复数或包含第一人称复数（we），谓语使用“don't”而非“doesn't”是正确形式，但句子缺少主语“we”导致“don't”与之前结构不衔接。应明确主语为“we”。建议：说复数或包含说话者时在句子中明确写出主语，以保证主谓一致。

× When I need to find a job or I want to enter this good university but I don't have these professors can connect personally so so I need to send a e-mail or.

✓ When I need to find a job or when I want to enter a good university but I don't have a professor who can connect with me personally, I need to send an e-mail.

原句句子结构混乱，缺少连接词并且定语从句结构不正确（“these professors can connect personally”不完整）。应使用“a professor who can connect with me personally”或“professors who can connect with me personally”。另外“不定冠词”和“a e-mail”使用不当，英语中应为“an e-mail”。建议：把复杂想法拆成主句和从句，使用关系代词（who/that）引导定语从句，并正确使用冠词（a/an）。

× I I think it's known to very popular because for most old people they may just use WeChat or QQ is enough that for some informal for some formal matters like a job or students maybe still use e-mail.

✓ I think it's known to be very popular because most older people may just use WeChat or QQ, which is enough for some informal matters, but for formal matters like jobs or for students they may still use e-mail.

句子中“不定式/短语”使用错误（known to very popular 应为 known to be very popular），且形容词比较级/词形不当（old people 应为 older people 表示年纪较大的人群）。句子结构冗长且缺少连接词，信息混在一起不清晰。建议：使用“known to be”固定搭配；用“older people”更自然；用从句（which is enough）分隔信息，明确正式与非正式场景的对比。

× I think it will be used more in the future because I think there will be more people want to find jobs and more students want to enter a good university, so they must use e-mail to guide the admission of this.

✓ I think it will be used more in the future because I think there will be more people who want to find jobs and more students who want to enter a good university, so they will need to use e-mail for admissions.

原句缺少关系代词“who”来连接主句与定语从句（people want -> people who want），此外“must use e-mail to guide the admission of this”表达不自然，应改为“will need to use e-mail for admissions”。建议：在定语从句中使用“who”，并使用更自然的短语如“need to use e-mail for admissions”来表达目的或必要性。