Advertisement— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Cải thiện ngữ pháp và trật tự câu, giảm tiếng ums/ahs, và trả lời trực tiếp với một câu chủ đề rõ ràng rồi nêu 1-2 chi tiết cụ thể (ví dụ: giai điệu, nhân vật, mùi hiệu ứng). Hãy dùng liên từ để nối ý và giữ dưới 5 câu.

例: Yes. A lot of adverts impressed me as a child because they had catchy melodies and memorable characters. For example, one TV commercial used a jingle that was easy to sing along to, and a funny mascot that children liked. Because of these features, many kids remembered the product long after the advert ended.

提案: Sửa lỗi phát âm và ngữ pháp, dùng câu chủ đề rõ ràng: trả lời có/không rồi giải thích ngắn gọn. Tránh lặp từ, dùng liên kết như 'for example' hoặc 'because' và nêu dẫn chứng cụ thể (xe buýt, tàu điện, áp phích).

例: Yes, I see a lot of advertising on public transport, especially on buses and trains. For example, many buses are covered with posters promoting mobile apps or local shops. Because these ads are highly visible to commuters, companies still use this traditional method.

提案: Tránh lỗi ngữ pháp lớn và câu thiếu ý (ví dụ 'I am a dog'). Bắt đầu bằng câu chủ đề rõ ràng (I don't like ads now), giải thích lý do ngắn gọn với ví dụ (quảng cáo làm gián đoạn video, lãng phí thời gian), và kết thúc bằng gợi ý cụ thể (chính phủ nên hạn chế quảng cáo pop-up).

例: No, I don't like advertisements nowadays because they often interrupt videos and waste my time. For instance, many YouTube ads appear before or during a video and I have to wait to skip them. I believe authorities should regulate intrusive ads to improve users' experience.

提案: Trả lời trực tiếp và rõ ràng: nếu bạn hiếm khi thích quảng cáo, hãy nói vậy và nêu điều kiện cụ thể khiến bạn thích (ví dụ: có thần tượng, nội dung hài hước, thông tin hữu ích). Sử dụng từ vựng phù hợp và cấu trúc câu đơn giản, có liên từ để nối ý.

例: I rarely like advertisements, but I enjoy them when they feature my favourite celebrity or when they are funny. For example, a short, humorous ad with a singer I follow would catch my attention and make me watch it to the end.

提案: Giảm lặp từ (TikTok được nhắc hai lần), dùng cấu trúc mạch lạc: khẳng định rồi giải thích với ví dụ cụ thể (mạng xã hội, pop-ups, ads in feeds). Tránh câu dài lủng củng; dùng liên từ như 'because' hoặc 'so' để kết nối ý.

例: Yes, I often see adverts on my phone and computer, especially on apps like TikTok and Instagram. They frequently appear in my feed or between videos, which is annoying because they interrupt what I'm watching. As a result, I sometimes use ad blockers or subscribe to premium services to avoid them.

× Yes, when I was a child I were be, uh, attracted by advertisement so much.

✓ Yes, when I was a child I was very attracted by advertisements.

The original sentence has subject-verb agreement and auxiliary verb errors: 'I were be' is incorrect; the correct past form is 'I was'. 'Advertisement' should be plural 'advertisements' when speaking generally. Also 'so much' is better replaced by 'very' for naturalness. Suggestion: use 'I was attracted by advertisements' for correct past tense and agreement.

× It has umm, melody, umm, interesting music, interesting character in advertisements.

✓ They had melodies, interesting music, and memorable characters in the advertisements.

Plurality and word choice: 'It has' mismatches with plural 'advertisements' so use 'They had' to match past context. 'Melody' should be plural 'melodies' or 'a melody' depending; 'interesting character' should be plural 'memorable characters' for natural phrasing. Suggestion: match number and use descriptive adjectives like 'memorable'.

× Yes, especially on the bus, they have many advertisements around the Bush to advertise them products and I think that is an in is an traditional advertising campaign that uh maintain to.

✓ Yes, especially on the bus, there are many advertisements around the bus to advertise their products, and I think that is a traditional advertising campaign that they maintain.

Preposition and pronoun errors: 'on the bus' is fine but 'around the Bush' is typo; use 'bus'. Use 'there are' for existence. 'Advertise them products' should be 'advertise their products' (incorrect pronoun). 'an in is an traditional' is garbled; use 'a traditional'. 'that uh maintain to' should be 'that they maintain' for correct verb and word order. Suggestion: use 'there are' + correct pronouns and word order.

× I think not now I am a dog and I don't like advertisements anymore.

✓ I think not; now I am an adult and I don't like advertisements anymore.

Logical word error 'I am a dog' is likely a mispronunciation for 'adult'. Also punctuation and sentence linking: insert semicolon or pause. Ensure article 'an adult'. Suggestion: use 'now I am an adult' for correct meaning and noun.

× They interrupt my video when I watching video on the YouTube and it's takes my time so much and I so that's why I don't like it.

✓ They interrupt my videos when I am watching videos on YouTube, and they take up a lot of my time, so that's why I don't like them.

Gerund/continuous and subject-verb agreement: use 'when I am watching' rather than 'when I watching'. 'Video' should be plural when general: 'videos'. 'it's takes' is wrong; use 'they take up'. Pronoun consistency: 'it' should be 'them' referring to advertisements. Suggestion: use progressive form for ongoing action and correct verb forms.

× I think that government should limit the.

✓ I think that the government should limit them.

Incomplete sentence: 'limit the' is unfinished; add object 'them' referring to advertisements and include definite article 'the government'. Suggestion: complete the clause with proper object.

× As I said before, I don't like advertisements, which when advertisements has my idol, I will enjoy to what this video, uh, sometimes, sometime.

✓ As I said before, I don't like advertisements, but when an advertisement features my idol, I enjoy watching that video sometimes.

Pronoun and clause errors: 'which when advertisements has my idol' is ungrammatical. Use 'but when an advertisement features my idol' or 'when ads have my idol'. 'I will enjoy to what this video' should be 'I enjoy watching that video'. Use 'sometimes' at sentence end. Suggestion: restructure clause: 'when an advertisement features my idol, I enjoy it sometimes.'

× Yes, especially in Tiktok, Instagram or Tiktok and I don't like this is interrupt me and make me feel frustrated when they're more convenient than anyone and than anytime anywhere and interrupt my video my.

✓ Yes, especially on TikTok and Instagram, and I don't like that they interrupt me and make me feel frustrated when they appear everywhere and interrupt my videos.

Preposition and clarity: use 'on TikTok and Instagram' not 'in'. Remove duplicate 'TikTok'. 'this is interrupt me' should be 'they interrupt me'. 'more convenient than anyone and than anytime anywhere' is unclear; replace with 'appear everywhere' or 'appear anytime, anywhere'. Fix 'interrupt my video my' to 'interrupt my videos'. Suggestion: simplify and use 'they interrupt me' and 'appear everywhere'.