Advertisement— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Make the answer more direct, concise and grammatically correct. Start with a clear topic sentence naming the ad, then give one or two specific supporting details (where you saw it, what impressed you). Use linking words like "because" or "and" to connect ideas and avoid repetition and filler words (e.g., "uh", "you know").

例: I remember an advertisement for The Amazing Spider-Man that impressed me as a child. I saw a large poster in the catalog at my hometown shopping mall, and the striking visuals and action shots caught my attention because they looked very realistic and exciting.

提案: Respond clearly and use correct sentence structure. Begin with a concise yes/no plus brief reason, then add a specific example. Avoid grammatical errors (subject-verb agreement, tense) and reduce hesitations. Use linking words such as "for example" or "usually" to make the response coherent.

例: Yes. In my town advertising is common on buses rather than trains. For example, the roofs and sides of local buses often display posters for brands, new shops, or restaurants, so I see these ads almost every day.

提案: Give a clear direct answer, then support it with one or two specific reasons. Correct grammar (I didn't have a phone; I liked looking at visuals). Avoid repetition and unclear phrases. Use linking words like "because" to explain why you like adverts.

例: Yes, I do. Advertisements remind me of my childhood because I did not have a phone then, so I spent time looking at posters and billboards. I enjoyed the colorful visuals and creative designs, which made them very memorable.

提案: Answer directly with a topic sentence naming the type of advertising, then give specific reasons and one example. Use correct grammar and smoother linking (e.g., "because", "for example"). Avoid unnecessary repetition and spoken fillers.

例: I prefer movie advertisements, especially trailers and posters. I enjoy them because they use striking visuals and music to create excitement; for example, a teaser trailer can reveal just enough of the plot and effects to make me want to see the film.

提案: Begin with a clear direct response (yes/no) and give a concise reason with a specific example. Use correct tense and reduce repetition. Use linking words like "because" and "for example" to make the response coherent and natural.

例: Yes, I see more advertisements on my phone than on my computer. For example, while scrolling through TikTok I often encounter short video ads and sponsored posts for new products or shops, so my phone is where I notice most ads.

× I still remember one of the most amazing advertisement that I have watched is it it was a advertisement for a new movie which is known as uh, The Amazing Spider-Man.

✓ I still remember one of the most amazing advertisements that I have seen; it was an advertisement for a new movie called The Amazing Spider-Man.

Plural noun form: 'one of the most amazing advertisement' requires the plural 'advertisements' after 'one of the'. Also 'watched' is less appropriate for adverts; 'seen' is better. Use 'an advertisement' (article before vowel sound) and 'called' is a natural verb for naming a movie. Remove filler words.

× So I will look at the catalog which is located nearby my hometown shopping mall.

✓ So I would look at the catalog that was located near my hometown shopping mall.

Article and preposition use: 'nearby my hometown' is incorrect; use 'near my hometown' or 'nearby my hometown shopping mall' is awkward. 'Which is located' is wordy; 'that was located' fits narrative past. Maintain tense consistency with past memory.

× Yes, obviously like to be honest, my country we doesn't have a trend, but we have a bus that always gonna took us around.

✓ Yes, to be honest, in my country we don't have trains, but we have buses that always take us around.

Subject-verb agreement and tense: 'we doesn't' is incorrect; correct is 'we don't'. 'trend' should be 'trains' (wrong word). 'gonna took' mixes future colloquial 'gonna' with past 'took'; use present 'take' for habitual action. Also pluralize 'bus' to 'buses' if referring generally.

× So usually on the bus it has on the roof area, it usually display an adverse advert adverse uh, pardon me, advertisement about a branding or a new shop or maybe a probably a food.

✓ Usually on the buses there are advertisements on the roof area; they usually display a brand, a new shop, or perhaps a food product.

Preposition and sentence structure: 'on the bus it has on the roof area' is ungrammatical; use 'there are advertisements on the roof area of the buses'. 'Adverse advert' is wrong word choice; use 'advertisement' or 'ad'. 'a branding' incorrect—use 'a brand' or 'branding for a new shop'. Simplify and correct article use.

× To be honest, yes, somehow advertisement reminds me of my childhood.

✓ To be honest, yes, advertisements remind me of my childhood.

Singular/plural and agreement: 'advertisement reminds' suggests singular, but context implies general adverts, so use plural 'advertisements remind' to agree with plural subject and plural sense.

× Childhood is because back then I I doesn't have a phone so I usually often look at a random places or just enjoying myself by looking for the visualised visualiser of it.

✓ Back then I didn't have a phone, so I often looked at random places or just enjoyed myself by looking at the visuals.

Pronoun and tense errors: 'I I doesn't' incorrect—use 'I didn't'. 'Usually often' is redundant; choose one. 'a random places' mixes singular article with plural noun—use 'random places'. 'enjoying myself by looking for the visualised visualiser' is unclear and ungrammatical; 'enjoyed myself by looking at the visuals' is clear and grammatical.

× So I very very like into advertisement.

✓ So I really like advertisements.

Adverb use and structure: 'I very very like into advertisement' is ungrammatical. Use 'really' to modify 'like' and plural 'advertisements'. Do not use 'into' after 'like'.

× Directly, I would just like to say advert advertising about a new movie that will coming soon.

✓ Basically, I would like to say advertisements about a new movie that will be coming soon.

Verb forms: 'will coming' is incorrect; use future continuous 'will be coming' or simple future 'will come'. 'advert advertising' is redundant; use 'advertisements' or 'ads'.

× That is one of my favorite things on earth to be honest is because I just love how would they promote it?

✓ That is one of my favorite things on earth, to be honest, because I just love how they promote it.

Pronoun and word order: 'how would they promote it?' is incorrect in a statement; remove conditional 'would' and use 'how they promote it'. Also punctuation: convert question into clause. Simplify and correct sentence order.

× How would the visualiser will work?

✓ How the visuals will work?

Verb forms and auxiliaries: 'How would the visualiser will work?' incorrectly uses both 'would' and 'will'. For a question about future presentation, use 'How will the visuals work?' In context as a clause, 'How the visuals will work' fits. Also 'visualiser' is not the right noun; use 'visuals'.

× So anything, anything about movie, I really love it, especially in advert advertising about the movie itself.

✓ So anything about movies, I really love it, especially adverts about the movie itself.

Number agreement and word choice: 'about movie' should be 'about movies' (general). 'advert advertising' redundant; use 'adverts' or 'advertising'. Maintain plural where generalizing.

× Usually on my phone is because nowadays in in today modern era, even with scrolling through our Tiktok, there were some type of advertisement about a product about a new shop that will open soon.

✓ Usually on my phone, because nowadays in the modern era, even when scrolling through TikTok, there are some types of advertisements about a product or a new shop that will open soon.

Tense and plural: 'there were some type' mixes past 'were' with present context; use present 'there are'. 'type' should be plural 'types' to match 'some'. 'in in today modern era' has duplication; simplify. Use 'when scrolling through TikTok'.

× So I would like to say that it is more it is more for me to see advertisement in my phone rather than a computer.

✓ So I would say that I see advertisements on my phone more than on my computer.

Redundancy and article use: 'it is more it is more for me to see advertisement in my phone' is wordy and ungrammatical. Use natural comparative structure 'I see advertisements on my phone more than on my computer.' Use 'on' for devices and plural 'advertisements'.