Swimming— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Cevap kısa ve anlaşılır, ancak dilbilgisi ve akıcılık problemleri var. Cümle yapısını düzeltin, gereksiz kısaltmalardan kaçının ve niçin sevmediğinizi açıkça belirtin. Öneri: Konuya doğrudan bir konu cümlesiyle başlayın, ardından sebepler verin ve bağlaç kullanın (because, so, therefore). Ayrıca "can't swim enough" yerine daha doğal ifadeler kullanın (e.g. "I'm not a confident swimmer").

例: I don't really like swimming because I'm not a confident swimmer. For example, I can't swim well in the sea, so I prefer staying on the shore or doing other sports.

提案: Cümleler düzensiz ve dilbilgisi hataları var; ayrıca mantıksal bağlantılar zayıf. Net bir görüşle başlayın, ardından sebep gösterin ve karşılaştırma için bağlaç kullanın (however, whereas). "Child's" gibi kısaltmalardan kaçının ve doğru dilbilgisi kullanın (children, adults).

例: I think learning to swim is easier for children, because they learn quickly and are less fearful. However, it can be more difficult for adults if they are afraid of water or haven't practised regularly.

提案: Cevap belirsiz ve kesik. Coğrafi bilgiyi net ifade edin, bağlaçlarla cümleleri birleştirin ve örnekler verin (e.g. well-known beaches or lakes). Gereksiz sesli tıklamalardan (uh) kaçının ve doğru kelime sırasını kullanın.

例: People in my country often go to the coastal areas, especially in the southwest where there are many popular beaches. For example, locals and tourists visit Bodrum and Antalya during the summer.

提案: Cümle yapısı ve kelime seçimi hatalı; düşünce açık değil. Başlangıçta net bir karşılaştırma cümlesi kurun, sonra nedenleri listeleyin ve bağlaç kullanın (because, while). "Lift power" yerine "buoyancy, waves, or currents" gibi doğru terimleri kullanın.

例: Swimming in the sea is harder than swimming in a pool because of waves and stronger currents, while pools have calm water and fixed depths which make swimming easier.

× Actually, I don't like swimming. 'Cause I can't swim enough for the swimming alone in the sea.

✓ Actually, I don't like swimming because I can't swim well enough to swim alone in the sea.

The sentence has informal clause start ('Cause) and incorrect phrase 'swim enough for the swimming alone'. Use 'because' to connect clauses and 'well enough to + verb' to indicate ability. Also remove redundant 'the' before 'swimming' and use 'swim alone in the sea'. Suggestion: Use 'because' in formal speech and structure 'can't swim well enough to...' to express inability. Grammar problem type ID:26

× I think it's not hard for. Child's It's difficult to learn for the adults I guess.

✓ I think it's not hard for children. It's difficult to learn for adults, I guess.

Original has sentence fragments and incorrect noun forms: 'Child's' is possessive instead of plural. Use plural 'children' and 'adults' to indicate groups. Ensure complete sentences: 'not hard for children' and 'difficult for adults'. Suggestion: Use plural nouns for general groups and avoid fragments. Grammar problem type ID:1

× I think the uh region side of the Turkey. I'm in southwest, southwest mornings beaches.

✓ I think people go to the coastal regions of Turkey. I'm in the southwest, and there are beaches nearby.

Original misuses articles and prepositions: 'the Turkey' should be 'Turkey' without 'the'; 'region side of the Turkey' is awkward. 'southwest mornings beaches' is ungrammatical. Use 'coastal regions of Turkey', 'in the southwest', and 'beaches nearby' for clarity. Suggestion: Omit 'the' before country names like Turkey, use 'in the southwest' for location, and describe beaches as 'nearby'. Grammar problem type ID:11

× I think swimming in the sea is not the sea easier than the pool cause the. Lift power in the water changing.

✓ I think swimming in the sea is not easier than swimming in a pool because the buoyancy in the water changes.

Original repeats 'sea' and misorders words: 'not the sea easier than the pool' is incorrect. Use 'not easier than swimming in a pool'. 'Lift power' should be 'buoyancy' or 'the lifting force' and 'changing' needs context: 'because the buoyancy in the water changes.' Suggestion: Use comparative structure 'not easier than' and correct technical term 'buoyancy' or 'lifting force'. Grammar problem type ID:25