Friends— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Try to make your answer more concise and avoid filler words like 'uh' and repeated words. Start with a clear topic sentence and then add specific supporting details using linking words to improve coherence.

例: Yes, I have a friend whom I've known for about 40 years. We grew up in the same neighborhood, attended the same schools, and even graduated from the same university, which has strengthened our bond over time.

提案: Avoid filler words and incomplete sentences. Use linking words to connect ideas and provide specific examples of activities you do with your friends.

例: Usually, we talk on the phone about our daily routines and goals. Additionally, if we have time on weekends, we go out for dinner together to catch up and relax.

提案: Complete your sentences and avoid repetition. Use linking words to explain reasons clearly and provide specific details about where you meet.

例: We usually meet in person about once a month because we live far apart and have busy schedules. However, we try to go out for coffee or dinner when possible.

提案: Avoid filler words and incomplete sentences. Use linking words to connect ideas and provide specific examples of activities you do with friends at home.

例: Not often; most of the time, we prefer staying at home where we have meaningful conversations, watch movies together, and sometimes cook homemade meals.

提案: Make your answer more fluent by reducing filler words and organizing your ideas clearly. Use linking words to explain why friends are important with specific examples.

例: Friends are very important to me because they are supportive and warm-hearted. For instance, they help me get through tough situations, and I am truly grateful for their support.

提案: Reduce filler words and improve sentence structure. Use linking words to contrast ideas and provide clear reasons for your preference.

例: I prefer quality over quantity; therefore, I like spending time with a small group of friends or even just one friend so we can support each other whenever needed.

提案: Avoid filler words and incomplete sentences. Provide specific examples of activities you do with friends at home and use linking words to connect ideas.

例: Absolutely, I often invite friends to my home because I enjoy their company. We usually cook together, watch movies, and sometimes they even help me with household tasks.

提案: Improve grammar and sentence structure. Use linking words to compare past and present methods of meeting friends with specific examples.

例: Yes, in the past, we could only meet friends in person or talk on the phone. However, nowadays, we also use social media and video calls to stay connected.

提案: Avoid filler words and complete your sentences. Use linking words to explain different preferences clearly and provide specific examples of suitable places.

例: I think it depends on our preferences. Sometimes, we prefer quiet places to visit friends, while other times, we enjoy going out together to concerts or festivals.

× Yes, I have a, one friend that, uh, I, I have known her maybe for 40 years because, uh, we were born in a, in a same neighborhood and we went to the same school and even, uh, we graduated from the same university and because of that and.

✓ Yes, I have one friend that I have known maybe for 40 years because we were born in the same neighborhood and we went to the same school and even graduated from the same university because of that.

The pronoun 'her' is unnecessary after 'I have known' because the object is already clear. Also, 'a same neighborhood' is incorrect; 'the same neighborhood' is correct. The sentence was also fragmented and redundant, so it was streamlined for clarity.

× Umm, we usually, uh, talk together on, on the phone about, uh, our daily routine, about our goals.

✓ Umm, we usually talk together on the phone about our daily routine and our goals.

The phrase 'talk together on, on the phone' has unnecessary repetition of 'on'. Also, 'about' is repeated unnecessarily. The sentence was corrected for smoother flow and proper preposition use.

× And sometimes on weekend, if we have time, we go out, uh, for a dinner and uh, we just keep, we just try.

✓ And sometimes on weekends, if we have time, we go out for dinner and we just keep trying.

The phrase 'on weekend' should be 'on weekends' to indicate habitual action. 'For a dinner' is incorrect; 'for dinner' is the correct expression. The phrase 'we just keep, we just try' is incomplete and was corrected to 'we just keep trying' for clarity.

× Actually, we meet each other in person maybe once in a month because, uh, we live a far away, uh, far away together and most of the time we are busy and, but we try to, uh, go out for.

✓ Actually, we meet each other in person maybe once a month because we live far away from each other and most of the time we are busy, but we try to go out.

The phrase 'once in a month' should be 'once a month'. 'We live a far away, far away together' is incorrect; it should be 'we live far away from each other'. The sentence was incomplete and was corrected for clarity and proper preposition use.

× Uh, not actually most of the time, uh, we prefer to stay at home and have, uh, a meaningful conversation, uh, watching movie and discussing about that movie.

✓ Uh, not actually. Most of the time, we prefer to stay at home and have meaningful conversations, watch movies, and discuss those movies.

The phrase 'discussing about' is incorrect; 'discuss' does not require 'about'. 'Watching movie' should be plural 'watch movies' to match the context. The sentence was also split for clarity.

× And sometimes we are going to, uh, make an homemade cook, homemade meal and.

✓ And sometimes we make homemade meals.

The phrase 'an homemade cook, homemade meal' is incorrect. 'Homemade' does not require an article 'an' before it, and 'cook' is unnecessary here. The sentence was simplified for clarity and correctness.

× They're quite important for me because my friends are really supportive and warm hearted and in my heart situation always, they, uh, help me get through a tough condition, uh, tough situation and uh, I'm so grateful for them and in return.

✓ They're quite important to me because my friends are really supportive and warm-hearted, and in my hard times, they help me get through tough situations. I'm so grateful to them in return.

The phrase 'important for me' should be 'important to me'. 'Warm hearted' should be hyphenated as 'warm-hearted'. 'In my heart situation always' is incorrect; it should be 'in my hard times' or 'in difficult situations'. 'Grateful for them' is better as 'grateful to them'. The sentence was restructured for clarity.

× Actually, I prefer uh, quality over quantity and uh, I like to have just small group of friends or just even one friends, uh, but spending uh, quality time together and support each other whenever, uh, we need.

✓ Actually, I prefer quality over quantity and I like to have just a small group of friends or even just one friend, but spending quality time together and supporting each other whenever we need.

The phrase 'small group of friends' requires the article 'a'. 'One friends' is incorrect; it should be 'one friend'. 'Support' should be 'supporting' to match the gerund form after 'spending'. The sentence was corrected for singular/plural agreement and verb form.

× Absolutely. Most of the time I invite friends to my home and I really enjoy their company, umm, because most of the time we are going to have really fun moments together. We are cooking together, we're watching movie. Even sometimes umm, they help me to.

✓ Absolutely. Most of the time I invite friends to my home and I really enjoy their company because we usually have really fun moments together. We cook together, watch movies, and sometimes they help me with things.

The phrase 'we are going to have really fun moments' is awkward; 'we usually have really fun moments' is better. 'We're watching movie' should be 'we watch movies'. The sentence 'Even sometimes umm, they help me to.' is incomplete and was corrected to 'sometimes they help me with things.' for clarity.

× Yes, in the past you know the only ways that we can met and visit our friend where through phone or in person, but these days we can use online, social media and even some some kind of video calls.

✓ Yes, in the past, you know, the only ways that we could meet and visit our friends were through phone or in person, but these days we can use online social media and even some kinds of video calls.

The phrase 'we can met' is incorrect; it should be 'we could meet' to indicate past ability. 'Where' should be 'were' as the past tense of 'are'. 'Friend' should be plural 'friends' to match context. 'Some some kind' is repetitive and corrected to 'some kinds'. The sentence was corrected for past tense and plural agreement.