Holidays— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more direct, use correct tense and clear reason. Start with a topic sentence naming the place and time, then give one or two specific details using linking words. Avoid filler words and incomplete phrases.

例: I went to Buffalo last December with a friend to attend an annual festival we had been waiting for. We stayed for the weekend and enjoyed the parade and the local food together.

提案: Give a clear topic sentence and two specific reasons with linking words. Correct grammar (e.g. 'I can go anywhere' not 'everywhere') and avoid repetition. Keep to 2–4 sentences.

例: Yes, I like holidays because they give me a break from work and exams. For example, I can travel anywhere I want or simply rest at home, which helps me recover and feel less stressed.

提案: Answer with a single named holiday and explain specifically why you like it, using linking words and clear vocabulary (e.g. 'family reunion', 'offer food at the pagoda'). Avoid confusing grammar and unclear pronouns.

例: My favourite public holiday is the Lunar New Year because I can have a family reunion. We visit the pagoda to make offerings and play traditional games together, which makes the day special.

提案: Start with a clear topic sentence describing a typical holiday activity, then add specific details with linking words. Correct small errors ('we stay there for two or three nights', 'the days are peaceful').

例: On holidays I usually go to quiet natural areas to relieve stress. For example, I often climb a nearby mountain with friends and stay there for two or three nights because the place is peaceful and quiet.

提案: Combine sentences into a clear response: state preference then give one specific reason and an example. Use correct expressions ('I can relieve my stress', 'I enjoy cooking'). Avoid fillers.

例: Yes, I do. I enjoy spending days at home because cooking helps me relieve stress. For instance, I often try new recipes and relax while tasting the dishes I’ve made.

提案: Answer directly (e.g. 'I prefer a leisurely holiday'), then give two clear reasons with linking words. Fix grammar ('I don't want to be stressed', 'I want to relax and spend time with my sister').

例: I prefer a leisurely holiday because I want to rest rather than be stressed. For example, I use the time to relax, meet family and visit my sister without any rush.

提案: State your preference clearly, then give two specific supporting details with linking words. Use correct phrases ('quiet places with few people', 'spend time with family and friends'). Avoid contradictory phrases in the same answer.

例: I would prefer a peaceful holiday because I enjoy quiet places with few people. This way I can spend time with family and friends and enjoy the local food without the crowds.

× My last holidays I went to Buffalo with my friend because we wait for, uh, that even for a long time and it has every year on December.

✓ My last holiday I went to Buffalo with my friend because we had been waiting for that event for a long time and it happens every year in December.

The speaker used 'holidays' (plural) but refers to a single last trip — use singular 'holiday'. 'We wait for... that even' is incorrect: use past perfect continuous 'had been waiting' to show an action that continued until the past event. 'It has every year on December' should be 'it happens every year in December' (use 'in' with months). Also use 'event' instead of 'even'. Suggestion: Use singular/plural consistently and correct verb tense for background actions ('had been waiting').

× So, uh, it's just gone there and try to enjoy it together and have a lot of.

✓ So, uh, we just went there and tried to enjoy it together and had a lot of fun.

'It's just gone there' is incorrect passive/auxiliary use; the correct past simple is 'we just went there'. 'Try' should be past 'tried' to match past narration. 'Have a lot of' is incomplete — use 'had a lot of fun.' Suggestion: Keep past simple verbs consistent when narrating past events and complete idiomatic expressions.

× Yes I do, I like holidays because I really holidays, I can go to everywhere that I want and I don't have to stress with my work and also my exam as well.

✓ Yes, I do. I like holidays because during holidays I can go anywhere I want and I don't have to be stressed about my work or my exams.

The original uses awkward repetition and incorrect word order. 'I really holidays' is ungrammatical; replace with 'during holidays'. 'Go to everywhere' should be 'go anywhere'. 'I don't have to stress with my work' should be 'I don't have to be stressed about my work'. Use plural 'exams' if referring generally. Suggestion: Use 'during' for time periods, 'anywhere' for unrestricted places, and 'be stressed about' for sources of stress.

× I hope that I can enjoy all my holiday and I will try to relax.

✓ I hope that I can enjoy my whole holiday and I will try to relax.

'All my holiday' is awkward; use 'my whole holiday'. Tense is acceptable but word choice needed. 'Will try to relax' is fine as future intention. Suggestion: Use natural collocations like 'my whole holiday' or 'all of my holiday'.

× The public holidays that are like based as far as I'm concerned is my view due to on the day I we I can't enjoy with my family like we have family reunion and also go to the pagoda to offer the food for the man and play some game with.

✓ The public holiday I like best, as far as I'm concerned, is the one when I can spend time with my family; we have a family reunion, go to the pagoda to offer food to monks, and play some games together.

Pronoun and clause confusion: 'The public holidays that are like based' is ungrammatical. Use 'The public holiday I like best'. 'I we I can't enjoy with my family' is incorrect pronoun use — clarify subject as 'I can spend time with my family'. 'Offer the food for the man' likely intends 'offer food to the monks'. 'Play some game with' needs a complement: 'play some games together.' Suggestion: Simplify clauses, keep subject pronouns consistent, and use correct objects for verbs.

× On the holiday, I always go to areas that can release my stress.

✓ On holidays, I always go to places that can relieve my stress.

'On the holiday' is overly specific; use 'On holidays' or 'During the holiday'. 'Areas' is awkward here; 'places' or 'locations' is better. 'Release my stress' is incorrect collocation; use 'relieve my stress.' Suggestion: Use correct articles for general statements and prefer natural collocations ('relieve stress').

× Just like I go, I can't. I climb the mountain to relax with my friends.

✓ For example, I often go climbing mountains to relax with my friends.

The original sentences are fragmented and use incorrect tense/person. 'I climb the mountain' is too specific and should be plural/general 'climb mountains' or 'go climbing'. Combine fragments into a clear habitual past/present structure. Suggestion: Use gerunds ('go climbing') or plural nouns for habitual actions.

× Sometimes we also stay at their two or three nights because all the day is peace and also quiet.

✓ Sometimes we also stay there for two or three nights because the days are peaceful and quiet.

'Stay at their' misuses pronoun 'their' instead of 'there'. 'Two or three nights' needs preposition 'for'. 'All the day is peace' is ungrammatical; use 'the days are peaceful'. Suggestion: Distinguish 'there' (place) from 'their' (possessive) and use correct prepositions for durations.

× The two I like cooking at home because I can't release all my stress and relax as well and get the uh, the taste of my food like it was so delicious as well.

✓ Secondly, I like cooking at home because it helps me relieve stress and relax, and I can enjoy the taste of my food because it is delicious.

'The two' unclear — likely 'Secondly'. 'I can't release all my stress' should be positive 'it helps me relieve stress'. 'Get the taste of my food' is awkward; use 'enjoy the taste'. Use present tense 'it is delicious'. Suggestion: Use discourse markers ('Firstly/Secondly'), correct verb collocations ('relieve stress'), and clear adjectives/adverbs.

× Yes, I would prefer leisurely do so I don't want to be straight, I just want to relate.

✓ Yes, I would prefer a leisurely holiday because I don't want to be stressed; I just want to relax.

'Prefer leisurely do' is incorrect structure — use 'prefer a leisurely holiday'. 'Be straight' likely intended 'be stressed'. 'Relate' is wrong; use 'relax'. Suggestion: Use noun phrases after 'prefer' and choose correct verbs ('relaxed/stressed/relax').

× I made a lot of people and try to uh find my sister more because I'm already stressed at work and study already so I have I want to relax.

✓ I like to meet a lot of people and try to find my sister more often because I'm already stressed from work and studying, so I want to relax.

'I made a lot of people' should be 'I meet a lot of people' or 'I make friends'. 'Find my sister more' unclear — interpret as 'see my sister more often'. 'Stressed at work and study' should be 'stressed from work and studying'. Suggestion: Use appropriate verbs ('meet/see') and express frequency ('more often').

× I would prefer a peaceful holiday. I like to go everywhere there is quiet and no peoples, all that I really don't know around me.

✓ I would prefer a peaceful holiday. I like to go to places that are quiet with no people; I don't want many strangers around me.

'Go everywhere there is quiet' is awkward — use 'go to places that are quiet'. 'No peoples' is incorrect plural; use 'no people'. 'All that I really don't know around me' is unclear; interpret as 'I don't want many strangers around me.' Suggestion: Use 'people' (uncountable in this sense), and express dislike of unfamiliar people as 'strangers'.

× I just want to stay with all the people like my family, my friend and get the food that I like.

✓ I just want to stay with people I care about, like my family and my friends, and eat the food that I like.

'All the people like my family, my friend' is awkward; use 'people I care about' and plural 'friends'. 'Get the food' should be 'eat the food'. Suggestion: Use plural nouns for groups and correct verbs for actions (eat, enjoy).