Holidays— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more concise, fix grammar and avoid repetition. Start with a clear topic sentence, include 1–2 specific details, and finish with a short concluding phrase. Use linking words (for example, “we visited” or “we also”).

例: I spent my last holiday at Christmas in Mexico City with my husband and family. We visited several museums and national monuments, and tried local restaurants, which gave us a great taste of the city. Overall, it was a memorable trip.

提案: Avoid vague repetition (“other countries... other cities”); make one clear reason per sentence and support it with a specific example. Use linking words like “also” and “for example.”

例: Yes, I love holidays because they let me explore new places; for example, I recently visited Mexico City and saw several museums. I also enjoy spending uninterrupted time with my husband and family, which helps us relax and reconnect.

提案: Good structure and clear reasons. Improve fluency by removing hesitations and tightening phrases (e.g., “time for myself for the routines” → “time for my routines”). Add one specific detail to strengthen the answer.

例: My favourite public holiday is Christmas because I can spend time with family and enjoy several days off work. I usually use the break to go for morning runs and relax at home, which helps me recharge for the new year.

提案: Reduce fillers (“uh”), correct tense errors, and give a concise list with one specific example. Use linking words like “or” and “sometimes.”

例: I usually either take a short getaway to another city or stay local and go out with my husband and family. Sometimes we try a new restaurant, and other times we cook a special dinner at home together.

提案: Clarify confusing phrases (e.g., “directly dislike cooking” unclear). Avoid fillers and redundancies; state 2–3 clear activities and one descriptive detail. Use linking words like “for example.”

例: Yes, I enjoy staying at home because I can have quality time with my husband and family. For example, we often watch movies together, bake or cook, and relax with a hot chocolate when it’s cold outside.

提案: Good contrast and conditional structure. Improve fluency by removing repeated phrases and using smoother linking expressions like “however” or “on the other hand.” Add a brief specific example of each type.

例: I enjoy both types of holidays. If I’ve been working hard, I prefer a quiet break at home to rest; however, when I feel energetic I choose an active holiday to explore new places, such as hiking or city sightseeing.

提案: Avoid fillers and repetitions. State the main idea clearly, then give 1–2 specific examples of activities for each preference. Use linking words like “for example” and “whereas.”

例: It depends. If I’m tired, I prefer a peaceful holiday to rest; whereas if I’m energetic, I choose an exciting break and do activities like swimming or playing sports and exploring a new city.

× OK, my last holiday was Christmas, Christmas time and I went to Mexico City with my family and was also with my husband and we had a really good time there.

✓ OK, my last holiday was at Christmas time. I went to Mexico City with my family and my husband, and we had a really good time there.

Run-on and missing preposition: 'Christmas time' needs the preposition 'at' to form 'at Christmas time'. The original combined multiple clauses without proper punctuation or conjunctions. Separating into two sentences and adding 'my husband' as part of the family clause makes the sentence clearer and grammatically correct.

× We visited many places like museums, restaurants, just going to monuments, national monuments there and it was a really.

✓ We visited many places like museums and restaurants, and we also went to national monuments there; it was really enjoyable.

Incorrect verb form and incomplete sentence: 'just going to monuments' mixes a -ing form with past simple 'visited'. Use parallel past tense 'went' to match 'visited'. The original ends abruptly with 'it was a really.' which is incomplete; replace with a complete adjective such as 'really enjoyable'.

× Yes, I love holidays because I have the opportunity to visit new places like other countries such as other cities or other places.

✓ Yes, I love holidays because I have the opportunity to visit new places, such as other cities or other countries.

Word order and redundancy: 'like other countries such as other cities or other places' is repetitive and awkward. 'Such as' correctly introduces examples. Keep the present simple tense but streamline the examples for clarity.

× However, this last holiday I spent, I had a really fun time with them.

✓ However, on my last holiday, I had a really fun time with them.

Incorrect word order and unnecessary verb: 'this last holiday I spent' is awkward. Use the prepositional phrase 'on my last holiday' to indicate time. 'Had a really fun time' correctly uses past tense.

× I think that public holiday I like best is Christmas because I have time to spend with my family like I said.

✓ I think the public holiday I like best is Christmas because I have time to spend with my family, as I said.

Article and clarity: Use the definite article 'the' for 'public holiday I like best'. Also replace 'like I said' with 'as I said' for more natural phrasing.

× Additionally, I have many days off from work so I can have time for myself for the routines like running or just resting at home.

✓ Additionally, I have many days off from work, so I can have time for myself to do routines like running or just rest at home.

Verb form and infinitive use: 'have time for myself for the routines' is awkward. Use 'have time for myself to do routines' and parallel verbs 'running' and 'rest' should use base form 'rest' after 'to' or be made parallel as 'running or resting'.

× I usually, uh, have a getaway to other city, uh, or just stayed in my city and go out with my husband and my family to restaurants or just to grab coffee or uh, make dinner at home and make a good dinner for all.

✓ I usually have a getaway to another city, or I just stay in my city and go out with my husband and family to restaurants or to grab coffee, or I make a nice dinner at home for everyone.

Tense consistency and word choice: Mix of present and past ('have' then 'stayed') should be consistent; use present simple 'have' and 'stay'. Use 'another city' instead of 'other city'. 'Make a good dinner for all' is unnatural; use 'make a nice dinner at home for everyone'.

× Yes, I love spending time at home because I have quality time with my family and my husband and also can directly dislike cooking, baking, or just, you know, resting.

✓ Yes, I love spending time at home because I have quality time with my husband and family and can relax, cook, bake, or just rest.

Pronoun order and word choice: 'my family and my husband' is redundant; 'my husband and family' or 'my husband and family' is natural. 'Can directly dislike cooking' is incorrect; likely intended 'can relax, cook, bake'. Replace awkward phrasing with clear verbs.

× I watch a movie and if it's winter, it's really comfortable.

✓ I watch a movie, and if it's winter, it's really comfortable at home.

Missing context: 'it's really comfortable' needs clarification of location; add 'at home' to complete the idea. Also join with a comma for better flow.

× It's really cozy at home taking a hot chocolate or a hot coffee.

✓ It's really cozy at home when I'm having hot chocolate or hot coffee.

Incorrect gerund phrase: 'taking a hot chocolate' is unnatural in this context. Use 'having' or 'drinking' and include subject 'I'm' or 'when I'm' to form a correct clause.

× If I'm working really hard, probably I prefer a quiet holiday so I have time to rest or be at home.

✓ If I'm working really hard, I probably prefer a quiet holiday so I have time to rest or stay at home.

Adverb placement and verb choice: Place 'probably' after subject for natural word order. Use 'stay at home' instead of 'be at home' to sound natural.

× But if I'm well, if I don't feel tired, I like to have an active holiday because I can explore.

✓ But if I'm well and don't feel tired, I like to have an active holiday because I can explore.

Redundancy and conjunctions: Combining 'if I'm well, if I don't feel tired' into 'if I'm well and don't feel tired' is more concise and natural.

× But if I'm feeling good, if I'm, I'm not tired, I prefer at exciting holiday, you know, exploring and you see, uh, going out the city, uh, probably swimming or uh, do a sport.

✓ But if I'm feeling good and not tired, I prefer an exciting holiday, exploring, going out of the city, probably swimming or doing a sport.

Article and preposition errors: Use 'an exciting holiday' (indefinite article before vowel sound). 'Going out the city' requires preposition 'out of the city'. Use gerund 'doing a sport' for parallel structure. Remove filler words for clarity.