Colours— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more grammatically accurate and concise. Start with a clear topic sentence, correct verb forms and reduce repetition. Add one specific reason or example using a linking word (e.g., because, so) to enrich your answer.

例: My favorite colour is black. I usually wear black clothes because they are versatile and match almost anything. For example, I often pair a black jacket with jeans when I go out, which makes getting dressed easier.

提案: Use correct tense and avoid fillers. Give a clear reason with specific language and link ideas (e.g., because, although). Replace vague words like 'cringe' with precise descriptions.

例: I dislike pink because I find it overly girly and too bright for my taste. Although some people like it for being cheerful, I prefer cooler colours like blue or grey because they look more mature and calm.

提案: Be clearer and more accurate: correct repetition, grammar and word choice. Use linking words to explain reasons and give a brief example of occasions when friends choose these colours.

例: I think my friends prefer summer colours such as yellow, orange and red because they are bright and cheerful. For instance, they often wear these colours to beach parties or summer festivals because they look lively in photos.

提案: Remove hesitations and use correct sentence structure. State the colour clearly, give a specific reason and use linking words. Explain how it affects you (mood, light) with a concise example.

例: Yellow makes me uncomfortable in my room because its brightness can be too intense and make me feel agitated. For example, when my walls were painted a bright yellow, I found it hard to relax in the evenings and preferred to add neutral curtains to soften the light.

× I like black so much and usually I wearing black clothes.

✓ I like black so much and usually I wear black clothes.

The verb 'wear' should be in the simple present form 'wear' for habitual actions with subject 'I'. 'I wearing' is incorrect because it uses the present participle without an auxiliary. Use 'usually I wear' to express routine.

× When I want to choose something I choose something with a black and other color.

✓ When I choose something, I choose something that is black and another color.

The original sentence has redundant 'something' and incorrect phrase 'a black and other color'. Use 'that is black and another color' to correctly modify the noun. Also add a comma after the subordinate clause for clarity.

× Uh, I didn't like, uh, pink because I think this cringe color and uh, this color is more, uh, cute and I didn't like that.

✓ Uh, I don't like pink because I think it's a cringe color and it's too cute, so I don't like it.

The student's use of past tense 'didn't like' conflicts with 'I think' (present). Use present tense 'don't like' to match opinion. Also 'this cringe color' is ungrammatical; use 'it's a cringe color' or 'it's cringey'. 'More cute' should be 'too cute' or 'overly cute' to express dislike.

× I like, uh, cold color.

✓ I like cold colors.

Use the plural 'colors' when speaking generally. 'Cold color' is singular and lacks article; the correct expression is 'cold colors' to refer to the category of colors (cool colors).

× I think our friends like summer summer colors, for example, yellow, orange, red like this color because the color is more enjoy, more relaxed killer.

✓ I think our friends like summer colors, for example yellow, orange and red, because these colors are more enjoyable and relaxing.

Use 'summer colors' (no repetition). List items with 'and' and use plural 'these colors'. 'More enjoy' is incorrect; use the adjective 'enjoyable'. 'More relaxed killer' is nonsensical; 'relaxing' correctly describes the effect of colors.

× What colour makes you uncomfortable in your room?

✓ What colour makes you uncomfortable in your room?

No correction needed; the sentence is grammatically correct. (Included for completeness.)

× I think, uh, yellow, uh, when I see yellow so much in my room, I think it's uh, umm, an uncomfortable uh, because the light and the color, uh, yellow is like, make me angry.

✓ I think yellow. When I see too much yellow in my room, I feel uncomfortable because the light and the yellow color make me feel angry.

Use 'see too much yellow' to indicate excessive presence. Replace 'it's an uncomfortable' with 'I feel uncomfortable' to use correct structure. 'Yellow is like, make me angry' is ungrammatical; use plural verb 'make' with compound subject 'the light and the yellow color' and 'feel angry' to express emotion.