Money— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Ответ нужно сделать более структурированным и кратким: начните с прямого утверждения, затем добавьте одно-два конкретных примера и причину. Избегайте повторов (например, «family and friends» и потом «relatives» дублируют смысл). Также следите за временами: выберите Past или Present Perfect согласованно. Используйте связующие слова (for example, because, so) экономно и логично.

例: Yes, I have. I borrowed money from my sister last year when I lost my job and couldn’t afford groceries. For example, she lent me enough to cover food and transport for two months, and I repaid her once I started a new job.

提案: Ответ хорош по содержанию, но можно сделать его короче и более естественным: начните с прямого утверждения, дайте один конкретный пример и кратко объясните, почему вы действуете так, добавив фразу о том, как вы оформляете условия. Уберите избыточные слова («short term needs» можно заменить на «short-term needs» и сократить).

例: Yes, I have. I once lent a friend $100 to pay an urgent phone bill; I trust them and ask for a clear repayment date to avoid problems.

× I was in very difficult financial situation

✓ I was in a very difficult financial situation

Missing the indefinite article 'a' before a singular countable noun phrase 'very difficult financial situation'. In English, singular countable nouns usually need an article (a/an/the). Suggestion: add 'a' to make it grammatically correct.

× of course sometimes I borrow money from my relatives

✓ of course sometimes I borrowed money from my relatives

The student switches past and present tenses inconsistently. The context is past experiences ('I have borrowed money','I was in...'), so 'borrow' should be in the past tense to match. Suggestion: use 'borrowed' to keep tense consistency.

× I do this because I trust them and believe in supporting people in short term needs

✓ I do this because I trust them and believe in supporting people with short-term needs

Incorrect or missing preposition and hyphenation with 'short-term'. Use 'with' to indicate the needs people have; 'short-term' should be hyphenated when used as an adjective before a noun. Suggestion: say 'supporting people with short-term needs'.

× but I always make clear terms to avoid misunderstandings

✓ but I always make the terms clear to avoid misunderstandings

Wrong word order: 'make clear terms' is unnatural. The correct phrasing is 'make the terms clear' or 'clarify the terms'. Also include 'the' to specify the terms being discussed. Suggestion: use 'make the terms clear' or 'clarify the terms'.