Money— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Your answer is clear, natural and concise with a good topic sentence and a supporting example. To improve, vary your vocabulary slightly (e.g., use avoid borrowing, rely on my savings) and add a brief linking phrase to make the reason-effect relation explicit. Also keep sentences to under five and avoid repeating words (e.g., ‘borrow’ and ‘loan’ close together).

例: I avoid borrowing money because I prefer to rely on my savings. For example, when I want to buy something costly, I wait and save up until I can afford it, so I don’t have to ask friends or family for help.

提案: The idea is understandable but the answer is incomplete and ends abruptly with an unclear phrase. Improve by completing the reason, using clearer vocabulary (e.g., financial ties can harm relationships), and adding a brief example or consequence with a linking word. Keep sentences grammatically complete and limit to five sentences.

例: No, I have never lent money to others because financial matters can strain personal relationships. For instance, if a friend owes me money, disagreements can arise, so I prefer to refuse or offer non-monetary help instead.

× As I'm quite a cautious person, I've never borrowed money from others because I prefer to manage my expenses with savings.

✓ As I'm quite a cautious person, I've never borrowed money from others because I prefer to manage my expenses with my savings.

Article errors / word choice: the phrase 'with savings' is grammatically acceptable but sounds unnatural here; 'with my savings' is clearer and specifies whose savings. This is an article/word choice issue classified under article errors (22). Suggestion: include the possessive determiner 'my' to clarify ownership and improve naturalness.

× I avoid doing it because when we have some monetary relationship with others, it will soon becomes.

✓ I avoid doing it because when we have some monetary relationship with others, it will soon become strained.

Subject-verb agreement and word form: 'becomes' is incorrect after the auxiliary 'will' because modal/future auxiliary should be followed by the base verb form 'become' (future tense issue/subject-verb agreement, IDs 7 and 27). Also the original sentence ends incomplete and unclear; adding a complement such as 'strained' completes the idea. Suggestion: use 'will become' plus an appropriate adjective or phrase to express the result, e.g., 'will soon become strained' or 'will soon become complicated.'