App— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Your answer is a bit long and repetitive. Try to be more concise and clear by avoiding redundancy. Also, use linking words to connect your ideas smoothly. For example, start with a clear topic sentence, then add specific details about the app and your experience with it.

例: Recently, I have been using a shopping app called 'Card' which my friend recommended. It is very user-friendly and helps me purchase new products online easily. Overall, I find it very convenient for my daily shopping needs.

提案: Your answer lacks clarity and is incomplete. Try to structure your response with a clear topic sentence and supporting details. Use linking words to connect your ideas and avoid grammatical errors. Also, complete your sentences to make your answer effective.

例: I am usually interested in entertainment and gaming apps. For instance, I use YouTube because it offers a wide range of videos, including educational content. Additionally, I enjoy playing BGMI, which is a popular gaming app among my friends.

提案: Your answer has some hesitation and unclear phrasing. Try to speak confidently and organize your ideas logically using linking words. Also, avoid filler words like 'uh' and be specific about how you find apps.

例: I usually find new apps in two ways. Firstly, my friends recommend apps to me because they are tech-savvy. Secondly, I explore the Play Store, which is a popular platform in my country for downloading various applications.

提案: Your answer is incomplete and somewhat unclear. Try to complete your thoughts and use linking words to explain your reasons clearly. Also, avoid grammatical mistakes and be specific about the types of apps and their benefits.

例: In the future, I would like to use shopping apps that offer a wide variety of products. This would be convenient because I wouldn't need to go outside to buy clothes. Online shopping apps save time and provide many options to choose from.

× There are many apps that I used on my daily basis but I recently tried a shopping app called a Card which was recommended by my friend and this app is very usable and it is easy to use this app and it's related with the to purchasing a new products online and I found it is very convenient.

✓ There are many apps that I use on my daily basis but I recently tried a shopping app called Card which was recommended by my friend. This app is very usable and easy to use. It is related to purchasing new products online and I found it very convenient.

The original sentence incorrectly mixes past and present tense and has awkward phrasing. 'Used' should be 'use' to indicate habitual action (present tense). 'Related with the to purchasing a new products' is incorrect; it should be 'related to purchasing new products'. Also, the sentence is too long and needs to be split for clarity.

× Are various apps in which I am interested such as YouTube because it is the best application that provide entertainment source.

✓ There are various apps in which I am interested, such as YouTube because it is the best application that provides entertainment sources.

The sentence is missing the subject 'There' at the beginning. Also, 'provide' should be 'provides' to agree with the singular subject 'application'. 'Entertainment source' should be plural 'entertainment sources' to be more natural.

× Along with this it also gives the content related with the other things such as study material and I use BGMI application app and it is a gaming app I spend.

✓ Along with this, it also gives content related to other things such as study material. I use the BGMI application, which is a gaming app that I spend time on.

The original sentence is a run-on and lacks proper conjunctions and punctuation. 'Related with' should be 'related to'. 'BGMI application app' is redundant; 'application' or 'app' alone is sufficient. The phrase 'I spend' is incomplete and needs clarification.

× There are many, we find out two different apps.

✓ There are many apps; we find out about two different apps.

The original sentence is incomplete and unclear. Adding 'apps' after 'many' clarifies the subject. 'Find out' should be followed by 'about' to indicate discovering or learning about something.

× sometimes it's recommend by my friends, uh, because they have lot of devices and they have the techniques to search out different types.

✓ Sometimes it's recommended by my friends because they have a lot of devices and the techniques to search for different types.

'Recommend' should be in past participle form 'recommended' to form the passive voice. 'Lot of' should be 'a lot of'. 'Search out' is incorrect; the correct phrase is 'search for'.

× Secondly, there is a, a famous website that mostly people of my country use is known as Play store.

✓ Secondly, there is a famous website that most people in my country use, known as the Play Store.

The sentence has redundant 'a, a' and awkward structure. 'Mostly people' should be 'most people'. 'Play store' is a proper noun and should be capitalized and preceded by 'the'.

× In the future, I would like to use shopping apps that offer a wide variety and I think it will be convenient for me because with the help of online shopping apps person not need to go outside for their about clothes and I think.

✓ In the future, I would like to use shopping apps that offer a wide variety, and I think it will be convenient for me because with the help of online shopping apps, a person does not need to go outside for their clothes.

The sentence has modal verb and subject-verb agreement issues. 'Person not need' should be 'a person does not need'. The phrase 'for their about clothes' is incorrect and should be 'for their clothes'. The sentence is also incomplete and needs to be finished properly.