Work— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Ответ звучит естественно, но можно сделать его более структурированным и лаконичным. Следует начать с прямого ответа, затем добавить детали, используя связующие слова для плавности. Избегайте излишних выражений, таких как "I would say" и "sometimes" без конкретики.

예시: I work and study simultaneously, managing my workload and meeting deadlines. Although it can be exhausting at times, I stay ambitious and productive by organizing my tasks efficiently.

제안: Ответ содержит полезную информацию, но структура и связность могут быть улучшены. Начните с прямого ответа, затем добавьте детали с использованием связующих слов. Избегайте фраз типа "I would say" без необходимости и уточните, что значит "by trial and error".

예시: I currently work at a transport company in Moscow. Previously, I have gained experience working as a tutor and as an assistant to a manager, which helped me understand different work environments.

제안: Ответ немного расплывчат и содержит повторения. Рекомендуется использовать более точные выражения и связующие слова для логичности. Избегайте неопределённых слов, таких как "probably" и "unfortunately" без объяснения.

예시: The workplace has limited incentives, so it is not an exceptional experience. However, despite some challenges, I generally like working there because of the supportive team.

제안: Ответ содержит полезную информацию, но можно улучшить связность и точность. Используйте более чёткие выражения и избегайте слов типа "probably" и "I guess". Также стоит исправить ошибку "jungle" на "juggle".

예시: Yes, I like my workplace because it provides valuable experience and the job is not too demanding. This balance allows me to effectively juggle work and university commitments.

제안: Ответ содержит хорошие идеи, но есть паузы и неуверенность в речи. Рекомендуется говорить более уверенно, избегать слов-паразитов и использовать связующие слова для плавности. Также можно уточнить планы более конкретно.

예시: In the near future, I aim to become a Government Relations manager at a large company like Mars. Ultimately, I want to specialize in government relations because I am interested in the intersection between business and government.

× Well, today I work in the transport company in Moscow.

✓ Well, today I work at a transport company in Moscow.

The preposition 'in' is incorrect when referring to working at a company; the correct preposition is 'at'. Also, 'the transport company' implies a specific known company, but since it's not specified, 'a transport company' is more appropriate.

× Moreover, by trial and error I have tried a lot of workplaces and I would say that also I have worked as a tutor and as an assistant to the manager.

✓ Moreover, through trial and error I have tried a lot of workplaces and I would say that I have also worked as a tutor and as an assistant to the manager.

The phrase 'by trial and error' is better expressed as 'through trial and error'. Also, the placement of 'also' should be before the verb 'have' for correct emphasis and flow.

× Well, probably there are not a lot of incentives at this workplace and I wouldn't say that is an extremely great experience.

✓ Well, probably there are not a lot of incentives at this workplace and I wouldn't say that it is an extremely great experience.

The pronoun 'that' is used incorrectly here; it should be 'it' to refer to 'this workplace' or 'the experience' properly.

× Probably yes, because I gain a lot of experience and in addition I guess that this work is not demanding and this is what I need right now because I am a student and I need to jungle between work and my university, so it is quite comfortable for me.

✓ Probably yes, because I gain a lot of experience and in addition I guess that this work is not demanding and this is what I need right now because I am a student and I need to juggle between work and my university, so it is quite comfortable for me.

The verb 'jungle' is incorrect; the correct verb is 'juggle' when referring to managing multiple responsibilities.

× Probably in the nearest future, I would get the position of GR manager in the big company, which is called Mars.

✓ Probably in the near future, I will get the position of GR manager in a big company called Mars.

The phrase 'nearest future' is incorrect; the correct phrase is 'near future'. Also, 'would get' is not appropriate for a definite future plan; 'will get' is better. Additionally, 'the big company' should be 'a big company' unless the company is already known to the listener.

× And, uh, overall in the future, I would love to be a government relations, uh, specialist because I want to work in this sphere which lies between business and government.

✓ And, uh, overall in the future, I would love to be a government relations specialist because I want to work in this sphere which lies between business and government.

The comma between 'relations' and 'specialist' is unnecessary and breaks the noun phrase. Removing the comma makes the phrase correct.