Work— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: 总体表达清楚，但有语法和表达不够地道的问题。应注意主谓一致（student -> a junior student; junior high school student -> junior high school students），简化句子并用连接词使逻辑更顺畅。可把信息分成两到三句：先说明身份，再说明兼职及感受。注意时态和冠词使用。

예시: I'm a junior at Beijing Sport University, and I also have a part-time job. I tutor junior high school students in English, which gives me a great sense of achievement, so I really enjoy doing it.

× I am now a junior student in Beijing Sport University, but also I have a part time job.

✓ I am currently a junior student at Beijing Sport University, but I also have a part-time job.

问题：时态/词序与介词使用。分析：句中使用现在时态“am”正确，但短语顺序和介词不当（应为 'currently' 放在 am 后，'at' 用于学校，'part-time' 作为复合形容词需连字符）。建议：把 now 换为更正式的 currently；用 at Beijing Sport University；part time 写为 part-time。

× I tutor junior high school student English and helping them with English gave me a sense of achievement, so I really enjoy this work.

✓ I tutor junior high school students in English, and helping them with English gives me a sense of achievement, so I really enjoy this work.

问题：量词复数与时态一致。分析：'student' 应为复数 'students'；句子中前半用一般现在时描述习惯性动作，后半应保持现在时一致，用 'gives' 而不是过去式 'gave'。建议：把 student 改为 students，gave 改为 gives，增加介词 in 使搭配正确。

× I'm currently a student. Although I have a part time job, I teach my student English online so I didn't have a fixed workplace.

✓ I'm currently a student. Although I have a part-time job, I teach my students English online so I don't have a fixed workplace.

问题：时态与复数。分析：描述现在情况应使用一般现在时 'don't have' 而不是过去式 'didn't have'；'student' 应该为复数 'students'；part-time 需要连字符。建议：将 did not 改为 don't，将 student 改为 students。

× I usually choose my school canteen as my workplace because at there I can speak loudly without disturbing others, so it's a good choice for me.

✓ I usually choose my school canteen as my workplace because there I can speak loudly without disturbing others, so it's a good choice for me.

问题：介词使用错误与冗余。分析：短语 'at there' 不正确，应直接用 'there' 或 'at the canteen'。建议：删除 'at' 或改为 'at the canteen'。

× I think this is not the best place for me to work, but this is the only option for me.

✓ I think this is not the best place for me to work, but it is my only option.

问题：句子冗长与代词重复（非严格语法错但可改进表达）。分析：重复使用 'this is' 显得啰嗦，改用 'it is my only option' 更简洁自然。建议：合并句子，使用更自然的代词。

× Sometimes the cutting was too noisy to hear my students words and I can't concentrate on whole classes, but in order to not disturb others, it's my only option to work in canteen so that I can speak loudly.

✓ Sometimes the canteen is too noisy to hear my students' words and I can't concentrate on whole classes, but in order not to disturb others, my only option is to work in the canteen so that I can speak loudly.

问题：时态、名词拼写、所有格与介词短语位置。分析：'cutting' 应为 'canteen'；噪音是现在经常发生应用现在时 'is'；'students words' 需所有格 students' words；'in order to not' 更常见的为 'in order not to'；缺少定冠词 'the canteen'。建议：修正单词为 canteen，使用一般现在时，添加所有格和定冠词并调整不定式顺序。

× Honestly, I don't like it very much because the cutting is too noisy, the kitchen clattering and people talking loudly, so it's hard for me to concentrate and hear my students.

✓ Honestly, I don't like it very much because the canteen is too noisy — the kitchen clatters and people talk loudly — so it's hard for me to concentrate and hear my students.

问题：词汇错误与动词形式。分析：'cutting' 应为 'canteen'；列举事件时需用完整句子或并列结构，动词形式应一致： 'the kitchen clatters' 和 'people talk loudly'。建议：把 cutting 改为 canteen，调整并列动词为一般现在时一致。

× However, this is the only option for me, so I need to talk loudly and use some viral materials to help my students understand better.

✓ However, this is the only option for me, so I need to speak loudly and use some visual materials to help my students understand better.

问题：词汇选择错误。分析：'viral materials' 语义不符，应为 'visual materials'（视听/视觉教具）更合适；另外 'talk loudly' 可换为更正式的 'speak loudly'。建议：将 viral 改为 visual，并用 speak 代替 talk。

× Honestly I don't have a clear occupation plans in the future but I think I maybe work on teaching way and I plan to get further study on TESOL.

✓ Honestly, I don't have clear occupational plans for the future, but I think I may work in teaching and I plan to pursue further study in TESOL.

问题：时态与词形错误。分析：'occupation plans' 用法不当，改为 'occupational plans' 或 'career plans'；'maybe' 作副词位置和形式应为 'may' 或 'might'；'work on teaching way' 不自然，应为 'work in teaching'；'get further study on TESOL' 应为 'pursue further study in TESOL'。建议：使用 'may' 表示可能性，调整名词短语和介词搭配。

× So this is the big reason why I take the iOS examination and want to go abroad.

✓ So this is the main reason why I took the IELTS examination and want to go abroad.

问题：句子结构与词汇错误。分析：'big reason' 可改为更自然的 'main reason'；'take the iOS examination' 显然为笔误，应该是 'IELTS'（或其它相应考试）；时间上若为了未来学习，过去式 'took' 或现在完成 'am taking' 取决于具体情境；更自然使用过去式或现在进行时。建议：根据实际时态改为 'took'（已参加）或 'am taking'（正在准备/要参加）；把 iOS 改为 IELTS。