Work— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Cevabınız açık ve doğal ancak başlangıçta gereksiz sesletim ("Uh") var; ayrıca tek bir cümlede daha fazla özgül ayrıntı vererek cevabı zenginleştirebilirsiniz. Konu cümlesinden sonra kısa bir destekleyici cümle (ne yaptığınız veya hangi alanda uzmanlaştığınız gibi) ekleyin ve toplam cümle sayısını 3-4 ile sınırlayın.

예시: I work as a lawyer at a private law firm. I specialize in commercial litigation, so I spend most of my time preparing cases and meeting clients. I really enjoy the challenge of solving complex legal problems.

제안: Cevap doğrudan fakat tekrarlar ve gereksiz ifadeler ("here", "Uh", "we're a big company") içeriyor. Sayıları ve detayları net verin, bağlaç kullanarak cümleleri akıcı hale getirin ve aynı fikirleri tekrarlamaktan kaçının.

예시: I work at a mid-sized law firm with more than 25 employees, located in the city centre. We handle a range of cases from corporate law to family law, so the team is quite diverse.

제안: İyi bir neden sundunuz fakat kelime seçimi hatalı ('spare' yerine 'space' veya 'break room') ve tekrarlar mevcut. Bağlaçlarla sebep-sonuç ilişkisini daha net kurun ve daha uygun, doğal ifadeler kullanın.

예시: Yes, it's a pleasant place to work because we have a large break room where colleagues can relax during lunch, play games, or have informal meetings. That friendly atmosphere makes the office enjoyable.

제안: Cevabınız tekrarlı ve terim karışıklığı var (employees vs employers). "Mid days" yerine "midday" veya "lunch breaks" kullanın. Daha akıcı ve daha kısa cümlelerle aynı fikri ifade edin; gereksiz dolgu sözcüklerini ('uh') çıkarın.

예시: Yes, I enjoy working there because my colleagues and managers are friendly and supportive. We often spend our lunch breaks together, play cards, or just chat, which creates a relaxed and sociable environment.

제안: Güçlü bir plan sundunuz ancak ifadeler dağınık ve tekrarlar fazla. Ülkeleri belirtirken tam isimleri ve 'the' kullanımı hakkında dikkatli olun ('the USA'). Neden İngilizce geliştirmek istediğinizi kısaca açıklayın ve geleceğe yönelik bir zaman çizelgesi ekleyin.

예시: I'm planning to work abroad, possibly in England or the USA, and I want to improve my English before I move. Improving my language skills will help me communicate with clients and colleagues more effectively, and I hope to apply for positions within the next two years.

× I work in a law firm where there are more than 25 staff here.

✓ I work in a law firm where there are more than 25 staff members.

The word 'staff' can be used as a collective noun, but when specifying a count it is clearer to use 'staff members' or 'staffing' to indicate individual people. Use 'staff members' to avoid ambiguity and match plural meaning. Suggestion: say 'more than 25 staff members' or 'over 25 employees.'

× Yes, it is a good place to work because we have a spare, we have a big living room where we can enjoy middays, play cards or rest.

✓ Yes, it is a good place to work because we have a spare room; we have a big lounge where we can enjoy our midday breaks, play cards or rest.

The original uses 'have a spare' which omits the noun 'room' and 'living room' is odd in a workplace. Use 'spare room' or 'lounge' and 'middays' is not natural; use 'midday breaks' or 'breaks.' Also punctuation helps clarity. Suggestion: 'we have a spare room' or 'we have a lounge for midday breaks.'

× I like the place where I work, uh, because our employees are, so our employers are so friendly.

✓ I like the place where I work because our colleagues and employers are so friendly.

The original contains redundancy and confusion between 'employees' and 'employers.' Use 'colleagues' for coworkers and 'employers' for bosses. Remove extra filler 'are, so.' Suggestion: choose either 'our colleagues are friendly' or 'our employers are friendly.'

× Uh, we can hang out together in mid days, play cards, uh, enjoy the break.

✓ We can hang out together during midday breaks, play cards and enjoy the break.

Use 'during' for periods of time rather than 'in' with 'midday.' 'Mid days' should be 'midday' or 'midday breaks.' Also coordinate verbs with 'and' rather than commas. Suggestion: 'during midday breaks' or 'at lunchtime.'

× I'm planning to work abroad, uh, such as England or USA, but before that I need to improve my English to, uh, be a better employee, uh, in a place that I will be going to work in abroad.

✓ I'm planning to work abroad in places such as England or the USA, but before that I need to improve my English to be a better employee in the country where I will work.

Use 'in places such as' for examples, include the definite article with 'USA' ('the USA'), and avoid awkward future progressive 'will be going to work in abroad.' 'Abroad' already implies overseas; say 'in the country where I will work' or 'abroad.' Also remove filler words. Suggestion: 'work abroad in places such as England or the USA' and 'improve my English to be a better employee.'