Hometown— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: ปรับประโยคให้เป็นธรรมชาติและถูกไวยากรณ์ ระบุข้อมูลให้ชัดเจน ใช้ประโยคเชื่อมสั้นๆ อย่าเกิน 4-5 ประโยค เช่น เริ่มด้วยประโยคหลักที่บอกที่ตั้ง ตามด้วยรายละเอียดสำคัญเกี่ยวกับทะเลสาบและบรรยากาศ ใช้คำเชื่อม (for example, which) เพื่อความลื่นไหล

예시: My hometown is Roi Et Province, in the northeast of Thailand. It is a fairly small city with a large lake in the center, which creates a pleasant environment. Many people enjoy walking and exercising around the lake.

제안: แก้ไวยากรณ์และการเรียงคำ ให้ระบุชื่อตรงและอธิบายสั้นๆ ว่าทะเลสาบมีอะไรดี ใช้คำเชื่อม (and, so, which) และเพิ่มตัวอย่างกิจกรรมเพื่อความชัดเจน

예시: I like the natural environment of my hometown, especially the large lake called Bueng Phlan Chai, which is in the city center. Because of the lake, the area has a fresh atmosphere, so many people come to jog, cycle, or do tai chi in the morning.

제안: ใช้เวลาและกาลให้ถูกต้อง (present perfect for experience, simple past for finished actions) สร้างประโยคชัดเจนว่ายังอาศัยอยู่หรือย้ายไปแล้ว ให้รายละเอียดเกี่ยวกับการเรียนและมิตรภาพ แต่ไม่ยืดยาว

예시: I lived there for about 15 years while I was a child and studied at local schools. I still have many friends from that time, which makes me want to visit the town often.

제안: ปรับโครงสร้างประโยคให้เป็นธรรมชาติและถูกไวยากรณ์ อธิบายเหตุผลให้ชัดเจนโดยใช้ตัวอย่าง (parks, safety, activities) และใช้คำเชื่อมเพื่อความลื่นไหล

예시: Yes, I think my hometown is a great place for young people because it has many parks and recreational areas. It is peaceful and generally safe, with visible police presence and community programs that keep young people engaged.

× And have a good environment because my province has the lake in the middle of the town.

✓ And it has a good environment because my province has a lake in the middle of the town.

The sentence is missing the subject 'it' before 'has', causing a There be/subject omission error. Add 'it' to make a complete clause, and use 'a lake' (indefinite article) for a singular countable noun. Suggestion: Begin with 'It has' and use 'a lake' instead of 'the lake' unless the lake was previously mentioned.

× I like about the environment of my hometown.

✓ I like the environment of my hometown.

The verb 'like' does not require the preposition 'about' when followed by a noun phrase. Remove 'about' to form the correct transitive structure 'like + noun'. Suggestion: Say 'I like the environment' or 'I like the atmosphere'.

× My hometown has the large lake, it name is Bing Plant Chai.

✓ My hometown has a large lake; its name is Bing Plant Chai.

Use the indefinite article 'a' for a singular, non-specific noun 'large lake'. Also, 'it name' is incorrect possessive; use the possessive adjective 'its'. Use a semicolon or period instead of a comma splice. Suggestion: 'My hometown has a large lake. Its name is Bing Plant Chai.'

× Where is the good atmosphere lot people like to exercise there.

✓ The atmosphere is good, and many people like to exercise there.

This sentence is ungrammatical and appears to be a run-on with misplaced words. Reorder into clear subject-verb phrases: 'The atmosphere is good' and 'many people like to exercise there.' Use 'many people' rather than 'lot people' and avoid redundant 'there' placement. Suggestion: Keep two coordinated clauses with 'and'.

× I had lived there for about 15 years when I was a child.

✓ I lived there for about 15 years when I was a child.

The past perfect 'had lived' is unnecessary when simply stating a past duration; use simple past 'lived'. Past perfect is used to show one past action occurred before another past action, which is not the case here. Suggestion: Use 'I lived there for about 15 years' for a completed past period.

× I study at my hometown, so I have my friend in my hometown.

✓ I studied in my hometown, so I have friends there.

Tense inconsistency: original context refers to past schooling, so use past 'studied'. 'My friend' should be plural 'friends' if meaning more than one; also repeat of 'in my hometown' is redundant; use 'there'. Suggestion: 'I studied in my hometown, so I have friends there.' Alternatively, if still studying: 'I study in my hometown, so I have friends here.'

× I like to go.

✓ I like living there. (or) I like to visit.

The fragment 'I like to go.' is incomplete and unclear without an object. Clarify what 'go' refers to: going to the hometown, lake, or exercising spot. Provide a full verb phrase like 'I like living there' or 'I like to go there.' Suggestion: Specify the destination: 'I like to go there.'

× Yes, I think my hometown is a great place for young people because in the city has a lot of park and this town is peaceful and safe.

✓ Yes, I think my hometown is a great place for young people because the city has a lot of parks and the town is peaceful and safe.

The clause 'in the city has' is missing a subject; use 'the city has'. Use plural 'parks' for multiple parks. Add 'the' before 'town' for clarity. Ensure consistent nouns: 'city' versus 'town'—use as intended. Suggestion: '...because the city has a lot of parks and the town is peaceful and safe.'

× We have lot of policemen to security the town.

✓ We have a lot of policemen to secure the town.

Use the quantifier 'a lot of' (not 'lot of') and the verb 'secure' (not the noun 'security') to express the action. 'Policemen' is acceptable but 'police' or 'police officers' is more natural. Suggestion: 'We have a lot of police officers to secure the town.'