Jewelry— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Answerは自然ですが、もう少し具体的な理由や感情を加えると良いです。また、'put on jewelry'よりも'normally wear jewelry'の方が自然です。

예시: No, I don't normally wear jewelry because it is quite expensive, and as a university student, I have to be careful with my budget.

제안: 'Rudy'は誤りで、'Ruby'が正しいです。文法的なミスもあります。より具体的に自分の好みを説明し、リンク語を使って文をつなげると良いです。

예시: I like ruby jewelry because it looks attractive and elegant. For example, when my friend wears a ruby necklace, I am always fascinated by its beautiful design.

제안: 理由は明確ですが、文が少し冗長です。'put on jewelry'よりも'wear jewelry'の方が自然です。もう少し簡潔に答え、接続詞を使うと良いです。

예시: No, I usually don't buy jewelry because I don't have enough time to work part-time and earn money, so I don't think wearing jewelry is necessary.

제안: 内容は良いですが、最後の文が不完全です。'they value it'のように目的語を明確にしましょう。また、接続詞を使って文をつなげるとより自然です。

예시: I think some people wear jewelry for a long time because they want to show their wealth and social status. In addition, since jewelry is long-lasting and expensive, they value it highly.

× when one of my friends wear a Ruby necklace, I'm really surprised and fascinated by its design.

✓ when one of my friends wears a Ruby necklace, I'm really surprised and fascinated by its design.

The subject 'one of my friends' is singular, so the verb should be 'wears' to agree in number. This is a subject-verb agreement error.

× I don't have enough time to work as a part time job and earn money.

✓ I don't have enough time to work a part-time job and earn money.

The phrase 'work as a part time job' is incorrect because 'work' is a verb and 'part-time job' is a noun. The correct expression is 'work a part-time job'. Also, 'part-time' should be hyphenated as it is a compound adjective.

× So I don't think it is necessary to put on jewelry.

✓ So I don't think it is necessary to wear jewelry.

The verb 'put on' is less appropriate here; 'wear' is the correct verb to describe having jewelry on one's body. This improves sentence clarity and correctness.

× In addition, jewelry is relatively long lasting and expensive, so I think they value.

✓ In addition, jewelry is relatively long-lasting and expensive, so I think people value it.

The original sentence ends abruptly with 'I think they value.' It lacks an object and is unclear. Adding 'people value it' clarifies the meaning. Also, 'long lasting' should be hyphenated as 'long-lasting' when used as an adjective.