Weather— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more concise and structured: start with a clear topic sentence about current weather, then give two specific supporting details (activities you enjoy and a downside). Avoid repetition and filler words. Correct collocations (e.g. 'summer has arrived' not 'the weather is summer', 'sunburn' not 'burn your skin if').

예시: At the moment it's summer in New Zealand, so the days are warm and sunny. I often go outside for activities like playing football and having barbecues with family. However, the strong sun can be a problem because it causes sunburn and makes me feel tired in the afternoons.

제안: Give a clear topic sentence and two specific reasons using linking words. Remove hesitations and correct grammar (e.g. 'hot weather' not 'hot weathers'). Use concise language and avoid repeating ideas.

예시: I prefer cold weather because I find hot weather exhausting and it drains my energy. For example, in hot summers I sweat a lot and cannot concentrate, whereas in colder climates I sleep better and feel more comfortable.

제안: Start with a direct answer, then explain benefits and a drawback with linking words. Avoid filler phrases and improve clarity ('hard to get around' instead of 'want it very hard to navigate').

예시: I prefer slightly wet weather because I enjoy the fresh smell after rain and cooler temperatures. However, it can be inconvenient at times since I don't own a car and find it difficult to get around when it pours.

제안: Answer directly and give a clear routine or reason. Avoid unclear phrases ('leave it for passive'). Mention frequency and typical actions you take instead of vague statements. Use correct grammar and complete sentences.

예시: No, I don't check the forecast regularly. I prefer to stay flexible, so I rarely look it up; instead, I always carry an umbrella in my backpack in case it rains.

제안: Provide a clear statement about impacts, then give specific examples and consequences. Avoid trailing off and repetition. Use linking words (for example, as a result) and finish ideas fully (e.g. ‘which makes them worried’).

예시: Climate change has altered local weather patterns and made seasons less predictable. For example, elderly people say summers are now windier and rainier than before, which worries them because it affects farming and outdoor activities.

제안: Start with a clear answer, then give specific reasons and a small personal detail. Correct minor grammar (e.g. 'build a snowman') and keep it within 2–3 supporting sentences. Use linking words like 'because' to show reasons.

예시: Yes, I would. I want to visit Wellington because it snows there in winter and I've never experienced real snow. I'd love to try building a snowman and exploring winter sports while learning about a different city.

× Recently the weather is summer in New Zealand.

✓ Recently the weather has been summery in New Zealand.

Use present perfect to describe a recent period up to now; 'summer' is a noun while 'summery' (or 'summer-like') is an adjective describing the weather.

× It's very nice and cozy to go outside and do some outdoor activities like play football, fishing, uh BBQ, sweet dreams and family.

✓ It's very nice and pleasant to go outside and do outdoor activities like playing football, fishing, having a BBQ and spending time with family.

Use appropriate adjectives ('pleasant' rather than 'cozy' for weather) and gerunds after 'like' for activities. 'Sweet dreams' is inappropriate here; replace with 'spending time with family'.

× But sometimes a little bit has a headache because the sun is very strong and it may it may burn your skin if.

✓ But sometimes I get a slight headache because the sun is very strong and it may burn your skin.

Original sentence lacks a clear subject and has repetition and an incomplete clause. Use a clear subject 'I', 'a slight headache' for clarity, remove duplicate 'it may', and finish the conditional without trailing 'if'.

× From my view, I prefer to live in a cold country most of the year because my body can't uh, bear the hot weathers.

✓ From my point of view, I prefer to live in a cold country most of the year because my body can't bear hot weather.

Use 'from my point of view' and uncountable 'hot weather' rather than plural 'weathers'. 'Can't bear' should not include filler 'uh'.

× I feel it's exhausted and drained when when the weather is hot, especially in summer.

✓ I feel exhausted and drained when the weather is hot, especially in summer.

'Feel' should be followed by adjectives describing the subject: 'I feel exhausted', not 'it's exhausted'. Remove duplicate 'when'.

× So for me, cold is the living in a cold country is the best.

✓ So for me, living in a cold country is best.

Original repeats and misorders elements. Use concise subject 'living in a cold country' and predicate 'is best'.

× I I do prefer to to be in a wet weather when the sky rains from time to time.

✓ I do prefer being in wet weather when it rains from time to time.

Use gerund 'being' after 'prefer' when speaking generally. 'Wet weather' is uncountable; use 'it rains' rather than 'the sky rains'. Remove duplicated words.

× But sometimes, especially for me, I don't have a car. I want it very hard to navigate different locations while it's raining.

✓ But sometimes, especially for me because I don't have a car, it's very hard to get to different places while it's raining.

Use 'it's very hard' as an impersonal construction and 'get to different places' instead of 'navigate different locations'. Avoid 'I want it very hard'.

× Not at all. Don't have that habit of checking the forecast from time to time.

✓ Not at all. I don't have a habit of checking the forecast regularly.

Complete the sentence with subject 'I' and use 'regularly' or 'from time to time' consistently. 'Don't have that habit' is informal and missing subject.

× Uh, for me it's uh, I do love to, to leave it for, for like for a past, for like passive.

✓ For me, I prefer to leave it to chance and be passive about it.

Original is unclear and wordy. Use concise phrase 'leave it to chance' and 'be passive about it' to convey meaning.

× So yeah, I always put everything in my backpack umbrella.

✓ So yeah, I always put an umbrella in my backpack.

Original word order is incorrect; place the noun phrase 'an umbrella' correctly and include article 'an'.

× It changed a lot, especially when I speak with elderly people, they, they usually say we are not used to this kind of weather, uh, in summer.

✓ It has changed a lot. Especially when I speak with elderly people, they usually say they are not used to this kind of weather in summer.

Use present perfect 'has changed' for recent change. Avoid run-on sentence; split and use correct pronoun agreement ('they say they are').

× So for example, this summer in New Zealand, most of the time it's raining and windy instead of uh, of sunny and dry weather, which make them very.

✓ For example, this summer in New Zealand it has mostly been rainy and windy instead of sunny and dry, which makes them very uncomfortable.

Use present perfect 'has been' for ongoing season conditions, adjective forms 'rainy' and 'windy', and correct verb agreement 'which makes them'. Add an appropriate adjective to complete the thought ('uncomfortable').

× It's snowing there in winter, so I've never been in a snowy country.

✓ It snows there in winter, and I've never been to a snowy country.

Use simple present 'it snows' for habitual climatic facts. Use 'been to' when referring to visiting a country.

× I do love to go there and enjoy the snow and building snowman and explore something new.

✓ I would love to go there and enjoy the snow, build a snowman and explore something new.

Use 'would love to' for desire; after 'enjoy' use a noun or gerund but here sequence of actions is better with base verbs 'build' and 'explore'. Use 'a snowman' and parallel verb forms.