Patience— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Improve clarity and coherence: start with a clear topic sentence, avoid unclear fragments, and give one or two specific reasons with linking words. Correct grammar and replace unintelligible phrases (e.g., “mini. Air Force on the dust”) with clear expressions. Keep answers concise (max 4–5 sentences).

예시: Yes, I consider myself a patient person because I stay calm under stress and focus on long-term goals. For example, during the COVID pandemic I practiced waiting calmly for results and kept working on small tasks to stay productive. This helped me remain composed even when things were uncertain.

제안: Be specific and use linking words: state the main cause, give one specific example, and explain why it makes you feel impatient. Correct vocabulary errors (e.g., “wash hour” unclear) and avoid repeating emotion words; use varied vocabulary such as “annoyed” or “frustrated.”

예시: I feel impatient when I have to wait for other people because it delays my plans. For example, if my friends take a long time to get ready at the mall, I become frustrated as it wastes my time and interrupts my schedule. As a result, I sometimes politely remind them to hurry.

제안: Organize answer with linking words and clear vocabulary: start with a topic sentence about feelings, then explain coping strategies using clear terms (e.g., “break the task into smaller parts,” “take short breaks”). Avoid typos and keep it within 3–4 sentences.

예시: I usually feel impatient and a little frustrated when a task takes too long, because I want to finish quickly. To cope with this, I break the task into smaller parts and take short breaks, which helps me stay motivated and focused. This method usually improves my productivity.

제안: Clarify job role and give a clear example: state your job and why patience is required, then give one concise, specific example of a situation requiring patience. Correct grammar (e.g., “when a program doesn’t work I need to run tests”) and avoid repetition.

예시: Yes, my job in IT requires a lot of patience because debugging and testing can be time-consuming. For example, when a program does not work I must run many tests and carefully check logs, which often takes hours but is necessary to find the problem.

제안: Provide a clear comparison and reasons: begin with a direct comparison (more patient now), then give specific reasons why (more responsibilities, experience) and an example of how you practice patience. Fix grammar and unclear phrases.

예시: Yes, I am more patient now than when I was a child because I have more responsibilities and life experience. For example, dealing with family matters and work deadlines has taught me to listen carefully and remain calm, and I practice patience by planning ahead and managing my time better.

× I think COVID. I think so because sometime I usually take me my mini. Air Force on the dust I tried stay calm down and focus on my goal.

✓ I think COVID affected me. I think so because sometimes I usually take a short break to clear my mind; I try to stay calm and focus on my goals.

The original contains several sentence structure problems: fragments ('I think COVID.'), wrong word choices ('take me my mini. Air Force on the dust'), missing connectors and punctuation, and incorrect verb forms ('tried stay'). Suggestion: combine related ideas into complete sentences, use 'sometimes' for frequency, 'take a short break' for the intended meaning, and use infinitive or base form with 'try' ('try to stay').

× sometime I usually take me my mini.

✓ Sometimes I usually take a short break.

The phrase mixes 'sometime' and 'usually' and uses incorrect words ('me my mini'). Use 'sometimes' or 'usually' (not both together) depending on intended frequency; 'short break' is a clear quantifier for a brief pause.

× Air Force on the dust I tried stay calm down and focus on my goal.

✓ I try to stay calm and focus on my goals.

Use present simple 'I try' for habitual actions. After 'try' use 'to' plus base verb ('to stay') not the bare infinitive. 'Goal' plural 'goals' fits general aims.

× I'm waiting for another person, like when I go to the mall with my friends and I wait for a wash hour to go with them.

✓ I'm waiting for another person, for example when I go to the mall with my friends and wait for a certain time to go with them.

'Wash hour' is incorrect; likely meant 'a while' or 'a specific time'. 'For example' better than 'like' when giving an instance. Use 'wait for a while' or 'wait for a certain time'.

× I'm very angry with them.

✓ I get very angry with them.

Original sentence is grammatically acceptable, but 'I get very angry with them' better matches habitual reaction. No pronoun change needed; clarification improves naturalness.

× When I have to do something for a long time I usually feel impatient and a bit frustrated too because I want to finish quickly and often lose my motivation and so I try break the tart into small parts or take the stock break.

✓ When I have to do something for a long time, I usually feel impatient and a bit frustrated because I want to finish quickly and often lose my motivation, so I try to break the task into small parts or take short breaks.

Errors: missing commas, incorrect verb form 'try break' should be 'try to break' or 'try breaking' (both possible; 'try to break' fits intent), misspellings 'tart' -> 'task', 'stock break' -> 'short breaks'. Use plural 'breaks' for repeated actions.

× Yes, my shop it has computer science require a lot of patience because the booking complex cost can take a long time.

✓ Yes, my job in computer science requires a lot of patience because complex bookings or processes can take a long time.

Original mixes subjects ('my shop it has computer science') and has subject-verb agreement issues. Correct by clarifying subject 'my job in computer science' and use singular/plural consistency: 'requires' for singular job and 'processes' or 'bookings' for plural items. 'Complex cost' unclear; likely 'complex bookings' or 'complex processes'.

× For example when pros pro program doesn't doesn't working so I'm often need to run test.

✓ For example, when a program doesn't work, I often need to run tests.

Errors: double 'doesn't doesn't' and incorrect verb form 'doesn't working' should be 'doesn't work' (base verb after 'doesn't'). Also 'I'm often need' should be 'I often need' and use plural 'tests' for repeated actions.

× Yes I'm mob pension than I'm will. I will try.

✓ Yes, I'm more patient than I was before.

Original contains unintelligible fragments ('mob pension than I'm will'). The intended comparative is 'more patient than I was.' Use past reference 'was' for comparison with childhood.

× As an adult I have more responsibilities and I'm practicing being patient every day because it's helped me dealing with family matter and work.

✓ As an adult, I have more responsibilities and I practice being patient every day because it has helped me deal with family matters and work.

Use simple present 'I practice' for habitual action rather than 'I'm practicing' (continuous is possible but simple present is natural). 'It's helped' should be 'it has helped' and is followed by the base verb 'deal' not 'dealing'. Use plural 'family matters'.