Chocolate— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: 回答は意図が明確ですが、表現に不自然さと冗長さがあります。主節と副節のつなぎを自然にし、文法ミス（例えば前置詞や動詞形）を直してください。また「used to」の使い方は過去習慣の説明として適切ですが、語順や冠詞の確認が必要です。より簡潔に1つの主題文と1–2の具体例にまとめましょう。

예시: Yes, I do. I find that a small sweet snack helps me concentrate when I study, and I often ask my parents to buy French chocolate because I enjoy its rich, smooth flavour.

제안: 頻度の表現は良いですが、理由の説明が不自然で曖昧です（"without worrying about surprise"は意味が取りにくい）。単数・複数の一致（"ones"より"brands"や"types"）や語彙の選択を改善して、具体的な頻度と理由を簡潔に述べてください。

예시: I eat chocolate almost every day, usually small bars. I prefer inexpensive brands so I can have them regularly without spending too much.

제안: 過去の話として内容は伝わるが、文法（時制、一致、冠詞）と冗長な表現を直す必要があります。"one of my favourite sweets" の語順や単数複数、過去形（"asked"）を使って自然な過去の記述にしましょう。具体的な例（好きだった種類や思い出）を一つ加えると良いです。

예시: Yes, I did. Chocolate was one of my favourite sweets when I was a child, and I often asked my parents to buy milk chocolate bars for me because I liked their creamy taste.

제안: 回答はほとんど意味が通っておらず、文法的にも誤りが多いです（不要なピリオド、意味が不明な語句"fries"）。理由を分かりやすくまとめ、具体的な点（味、歴史、利用の多様性など）を挙げ、接続詞で繋げてください。

예시: I think chocolate is popular worldwide because it tastes good, comes in many varieties, and is often affordable, so people can enjoy it on many occasions.

제안: 主旨は分かりますが、語順や論理のつながりが不自然です（"bitter one"より"bitter/dark chocolate"、比較表現の改善）。理由を明確にし、簡潔な構造で述べましょう。

예시: I prefer dark chocolate because milk chocolate is usually too sweet for me, while dark chocolate has a richer, more intense cocoa flavour.

제안: 肯定はできているが条件節の文法と代名詞の使い方が不自然（"if that people likes" → "if people like"、"I have gave" → "I have given"）。具体性を加え、誰に贈ったかやどんな場面で適切かを短く述べると良いです。

예시: Yes, I think chocolate makes a good gift if the recipient likes sweets. For example, I have given small boxes of assorted chocolates to friends on birthdays.

× Yes, because when I'm studying, having something sweet helps me concentrate to the studying.

✓ Yes, because when I'm studying, having something sweet helps me concentrate on studying.

The preposition 'concentrate' is typically followed by 'on' + noun or gerund. 'Concentrate to the studying' is incorrect. Use 'concentrate on studying' or 'concentrate on my studies'. Suggestion: use 'concentrate on studying' for natural phrasing.

× Moreover, I also used to ask my parents to buy French chocolate because I liked the rich taste of that.

✓ Moreover, I used to ask my parents to buy French chocolate because I liked its rich taste.

The phrase 'used to' correctly indicates a past habit. However 'that' is a weak reference; 'its rich taste' properly refers to the chocolate. Also remove redundant 'also'. Suggestion: say 'I used to ask my parents' or 'I often asked my parents'.

× I eat chocolate almost every day. I always choose affordable ones because I can enjoy it regularly without worrying about surprise.

✓ I eat chocolate almost every day. I always choose affordable ones because I can enjoy them regularly without worrying about surprises.

'Chocolate' in plural contexts requires plural pronoun 'them' to refer to 'ones'. 'Surprise' should be plural 'surprises' to match general noun use. Suggestion: match pronoun number to the noun and pluralize countable nouns when speaking generally.

× When I was a child, I often ate chocolate because the chocolate is one of my favorite sweet in the world and I always ask to my parents to buy them.

✓ When I was a child, I often ate chocolate because chocolate is one of my favorite sweets in the world and I always asked my parents to buy it.

Do not use 'the' before a general uncountable noun like 'chocolate' here. 'Sweet' should be plural 'sweets' after 'one of my favorite'. 'Ask to my parents' is incorrect; use 'ask my parents' or 'asked my parents'. Pronoun 'them' should be 'it' because 'chocolate' is uncountable here. Suggestion: 'chocolate is one of my favorite sweets' and use past 'asked' to match the past timeframe.

× Chocolate is popular around the world because. It's fries is very good for the consumers around ¥200 now, so.

✓ Chocolate is popular around the world because it tastes good and is widely available at affordable prices, often around ¥200.

Sentence fragment 'because.' leaves the clause incomplete. 'It's fries is very good' is meaningless and incorrect grammar. Rephrase to give clear reasons: taste and availability/price. Use 'it tastes good' and 'affordable prices around ¥200' for clarity. Suggestion: avoid fragments and ensure cause follows 'because'.

× My favorite flavor of chocolate is the bitter one because if it includes high percentage of milk, it is too sweet for me and so I enjoy.

✓ My favorite flavor of chocolate is the bitter kind because if it contains a high percentage of milk, it is too sweet for me and I don't enjoy it.

'Bitter one' is awkward; 'bitter kind' or 'bitter chocolate' is better. 'Includes high percentage of milk' should be 'contains a high percentage of milk'. The original ends with 'so I enjoy' which contradicts the meaning; it should say 'I don't enjoy it.' Suggestion: use 'contain' for ingredients and ensure logical coherence of final clause.

× Yes, I think so if that people likes chocolate because they can enjoy many flavors of chocolate and also I have gave chocolate as a small gift to my.

✓ Yes, I think so if those people like chocolate because they can enjoy many flavors, and I have given chocolate as a small gift to them.

'If that people likes' is incorrect: use 'if those people like'. Subject-verb agreement: 'people like' not 'likes'. 'I have gave' is wrong; use present perfect 'I have given'. End needs an object: 'to them'. Suggestion: use correct relative demonstrative 'those', match verb to plural subjects, and use correct past participle 'given'.