Chocolate— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be direct and relevant: start with a clear topic sentence that answers the question, then add one supporting reason. Avoid unrelated details (like movie titles) unless they clearly support your point and are correctly named. Use natural phrasing and correct names.

예시: Yes, I really like eating chocolate because it tastes rich and comforting. For example, when I’m stressed I often eat a small piece to relax, and I also enjoy trying chocolate from different countries.

제안: Give a clear frequency first, then add one or two concise supporting details using linking words. Avoid filler sounds and unfinished questions. Be specific about contexts or reasons.

예시: I eat chocolate about twice a week. For example, I usually have a small piece after dinner or when I meet friends for coffee, and I like trying milk, dark, and white varieties.

제안: Answer directly with a past tense statement and give one clear supporting detail. Keep sentences natural and avoid awkward adverbs like “obediently.” Mention a specific memory to make it vivid.

예시: Yes, I often ate chocolate as a child because my parents frequently brought it home as a treat. I remember being excited when they returned from work with my favorite bars.

제안: Start with a clear topic sentence stating your main reasons, then use linking words to list them. Use accurate vocabulary (e.g. “dark” not “bark”) and give specific examples or explanations for each reason.

예시: I think chocolate is popular worldwide for two main reasons: it’s widely available and it comes in many flavours. For instance, you can easily find milk, dark, and white chocolate, as well as flavored bars like hazelnut or orange.

제안: Answer directly, use correct grammar and complete sentences. Explain briefly why you prefer that flavour with one specific detail. Avoid sentence fragments and punctuation errors.

예시: My favourite flavour is milk chocolate because it’s smooth and not too bitter. I especially like having a small piece with my coffee or tea in the afternoon.

제안: Give a clear opinion, then support it with one or two relevant reasons and a brief example. Keep language natural and avoid repeating phrases. Mention occasions when chocolate makes a suitable gift.

예시: Yes, I think chocolate makes a great gift because most people enjoy it and it’s easy to share. For example, I often give a box of chocolates on birthdays or Valentine’s Day because it’s simple and appreciated.

× To be honest, I'm keen on eating chocolate. Even my favorite movie is about chocolate. Will Ivanka, if you know.

✓ To be honest, I'm keen on eating chocolate. Even my favorite movie is about chocolate: Willy Wonka, if you know it.

The original has a wrong name 'Will Ivanka' and omits the object 'it' after 'know'. This is a vocabulary/word-choice and pronoun omission error. Replace the incorrect name with the likely intended film title 'Willy Wonka' and add 'it' after 'know' to complete the clause. Also use a colon or dash to connect the related sentences clearly. Grammar problem type ID: 12

× I eat chocolates regularly, about twice a week if it's not more.

✓ I eat chocolate regularly, about twice a week, sometimes more.

'Chocolates' as a plural is possible but when speaking generally about the food, the uncountable noun 'chocolate' is more natural. The phrase 'if it's not more' is ungrammatical; replace with 'sometimes more' to express frequency clearly. Grammar problem type ID: 1

× Uh, I love eating different types of chocolates. For example, milk chocolate, white chocolate, or dark chocolate. And what's the thing I love most about chocolate is that you can mix it?

✓ I love eating different types of chocolate, for example milk chocolate, white chocolate, or dark chocolate. What I love most about chocolate is that you can mix them.

Combine the short fragments into smoother sentences. Use 'types of chocolate' (uncountable) and change the question ending to a statement. 'You can mix it' is wrong because 'it' is unclear and singular; use 'them' to refer to different chocolates. This fixes sentence structure and pronoun reference. Grammar problem type ID: 26

× To be honest, I'm in love with chocolate ever since I was a child for the reason that every time my father or mother returned, they obediently brought with them some chocolate that made me love it more.

✓ To be honest, I've been in love with chocolate ever since I was a child because whenever my father or mother returned, they would bring me some chocolate, which made me love it more.

'I'm in love... ever since' requires present perfect ('I've been') to link past start time to present. 'For the reason that' is wordy; 'because' is natural. 'Obediently brought with them' is odd—use 'would bring me' to describe habitual past actions. Add 'which' to connect the result clause. This fixes tense and clarity. Grammar problem type ID: 6

× In my opinion, the thing that makes chocolate very popular that it is sold everywhere firstly and secondly it's not annoying since you can change flavors every time.

✓ In my opinion, what makes chocolate very popular is that it is sold everywhere, and you can change flavors whenever you want.

Original mixes clauses incorrectly. Use 'what makes... is that' for clearness. 'Firstly' is unnecessary; combine reasons with 'and'. 'Not annoying' is awkward; use natural phrasing 'you can change flavors whenever you want'. This corrects sentence structure and wording. Grammar problem type ID: 26

× For example you can buy milk, bark or white chocolate which makes them interesting every time.

✓ For example, you can buy milk, dark, or white chocolate, which makes it interesting every time.

'Bark' is likely a misspelling of 'dark'. 'Which makes them' is wrong because 'chocolate' here is a category (singular or uncountable); use 'it' or rephrase. Fix spelling and pronoun reference. Grammar problem type ID: 12

× My favorite flavor chocolate is milk chocolate for the reason that it's really. Sweet it come mixing with coffee or tea.

✓ My favorite flavor of chocolate is milk chocolate because it's really sweet and goes well with coffee or tea.

Fix structure: 'flavor of chocolate' is correct. Remove the stray period and join fragments. 'Come mixing' is ungrammatical; use 'goes well with' to express compatibility. This addresses sentence structure and word choice. Grammar problem type ID: 26

× In my opinion, it's a great idea to gift others a chocolate as a present.

✓ In my opinion, it's a great idea to give someone chocolate as a present.

'Gift others a chocolate' is awkward. Use 'give someone chocolate' or 'give someone a chocolate' depending on whether you mean any chocolate (uncountable) or a specific chocolate (countable). Remove redundant 'as a present'. This corrects article and natural phrasing. Grammar problem type ID: 22

× We even have a chocolate day which is the day where everyone gives each other a chocolate as a gift.

✓ We even have a Chocolate Day, when everyone gives each other chocolate as a gift.

Capitalize the event name if appropriate. Use 'when' instead of 'which is the day where'. 'A chocolate' can be plural/uncountable; 'gives each other chocolate' sounds more natural. This addresses sentence structure and article use. Grammar problem type ID: 26

× So for me, chocolate as a gift is really good idea.

✓ So for me, chocolate as a gift is a really good idea.

Missing indefinite article 'a' before 'really good idea'. Add 'a' to correct the noun phrase. This fixes article error. Grammar problem type ID: 22