Singing— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more fluent and concise: remove fillers (um, ah), correct vocabulary (e.g., 'release stress' not 'release threats'), and use a clear topic sentence plus one or two specific details. Keep answers under five sentences and avoid repetition.

예시: Yes, I enjoy singing because it lifts my mood. For example, I often sing in the shower at home, which helps me relax and forget stress after a long day.

제안: Use correct grammar (e.g., 'haven't had' + 'have wanted' or 'want to learn'), remove hesitations, and give specific supporting details using linking words (e.g., 'however', 'so'). Keep it to 2–3 sentences.

예시: I haven't had any formal singing lessons, but I've always wanted to learn. Instead, I practice by singing along to relaxing songs at home, so I can improve my pitch and feel more confident.

제안: Clarify who you mean and correct grammar and vocabulary (use 'for my younger sister and brother'). Remove repetitions and add a concise reason with linking words. Limit to one topic sentence and one supporting sentence.

예시: I would like to sing for my younger sister and brother because they have always supported me. Singing in front of them makes me feel comfortable and relaxed.

제안: Be clear and precise: replace unclear phrases ('it's work for me', 'bring antiphon') with correct expressions like 'it works for me' or 'bring joy'. Use linking words to structure the idea and give a specific example or reason.

예시: Yes, absolutely. Singing brings joy because it helps people express emotions and relax; for example, many people, including me, sing in the shower or car to lift their spirits.

× I always sing in the shower with myself, at home, for myself. To release threats.

✓ I always sing in the shower by myself at home to relieve stress.

The student used 'with myself' and 'To release threats' which are incorrect. 'By myself' is the correct phrase for doing something alone. 'Relieve stress' is the correct collocation; 'release threats' is wrong word choice and 'To' should be part of the sentence rather than a sentence fragment. Suggestion: use common collocations and combine fragments into one complete sentence.

× I umm, haven't had any formal singing lessons but I've always want to learn.

✓ I haven't had any formal singing lessons but I've always wanted to learn.

The verb 'want' must be in the past participle/past form 'wanted' when used with 'have' + 'always' to express a continuous desire up to now (present perfect meaning). Use 'I've always wanted' to indicate that the desire started in the past and continues.

× I often practice by singing along to UMM to relax songs at home because it's have me relax and.

✓ I often practice by singing along to relaxing songs at home because it helps me relax.

Multiple issues: 'to relax songs' is incorrect order and word form; use 'relaxing songs' (adjective). 'it's have me relax' is ungrammatical — use 'it helps me relax' for the present habitual effect. Also remove filler and complete the sentence.

× I want to sing 4 of my younger sister and and younger brother because they have always they have only supported me and I feel comfortable umm and relaxing singing in front of them. Yeah they haven't.

✓ I want to sing for my younger sister and younger brother because they have always supported me, and I feel comfortable and relaxed singing in front of them.

The student wrote '4 of' instead of 'for' (typo) and repeated words. 'They have always they have only supported me' is redundant; use 'they have always supported me'. Use parallel adjective form 'comfortable and relaxed' rather than 'relaxing'. Remove the fragment 'Yeah they haven't' or clarify; here it seems unnecessary. Suggestion: proofread for typos and remove repetitions.

× Yeah, absolutely, because it's work for me. Umm, singing can, uh, singing can bring her, can bring antiphon. That's make people happier. And some people like me sing in showers and car for relaxing.

✓ Yeah, absolutely, because it works for me. Singing can lift people's moods and make them happier. Some people, like me, sing in the shower or in the car to relax.

Several tense and word choice errors: use 'it works' (third person singular present). 'Bring her, can bring antiphon' are meaningless or wrong words — intended meaning is 'lift people's moods' or 'bring happiness'. 'That's make' should be 'That makes' or rephrased; here use 'make them happier'. 'Sing in showers and car' needs singular forms with articles: 'the shower' or 'the car' or 'in the shower or in the car'. Use 'to relax' instead of 'for relaxing'. Suggestion: choose correct verbs and collocations and ensure subject-verb agreement.