Singing— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Make your answer more concise and natural by starting with a clear topic sentence, then give one specific reason and a brief example. Reduce repetition (e.g., avoid saying 'I like' twice) and keep to 2–3 sentences. Use a linking word when adding the example.

예시: Yes, I enjoy singing because it makes me feel happy and confident. For example, I often sing upbeat pop songs when I cook, which lifts my mood and helps me relax.

제안: Combine short sentences into a clearer, more natural response that states whether you learned formally or informally, then give one specific detail about what you learned. Use linking words like 'so' or 'for example' to connect ideas.

예시: Yes, I learned informally from a university friend who is a trained singer, so she showed me basic techniques like breathing and pitch control. For example, she taught me how to breathe from the diaphragm to hold notes longer.

제안: Be more concise and natural: state the person and give a brief, specific reason or example of how you would sing for them. Avoid repetitive phrases like 'to my boyfriend' twice and replace vague phrases like 'present some shows' with a clearer activity.

예시: I'd like to sing for my boyfriend because he means a lot to me, and I enjoy making him smile. For instance, I sometimes perform a short song for him on our anniversary to make the moment special.

제안: Remove hesitations (like 'uh') and tighten the answer: give a clear opinion, then one specific reason and an example. Use linking words such as 'because' or 'for example' to make the response coherent.

예시: Yes, I think singing can make people happier because a bright tone of voice can lift moods. For example, singing together at a party often helps people relax and bond with each other.

× I really like singing because I like to hear my voice and I choose the songs that I would like to sing and these songs give me a sense of fun.

✓ I really like singing because I like to hear my voice, choose songs I want to sing, and these songs give me a sense of enjoyment.

Run-on sentence and repetition of 'I like' make it awkward; use parallel gerunds and more natural vocabulary. Use 'singing' (verb + -ing) correctly as a noun; keep parallel structure for verbs following 'I like' (e.g., 'hear', 'choose'). Replace 'a sense of fun' with 'a sense of enjoyment' for natural phrasing.

× She taught me how to sing.

✓ She taught me how to sing.

This sentence is correct; 'taught' is the proper past tense of 'teach' to describe a past action. No change needed.

× She is a good professional singer and she took some lessons about how to sing, so I trust her.

✓ She is a professional singer and she took some lessons on how to sing, so I trust her.

'Good professional singer' is redundant; use 'professional singer'. Use the preposition 'on' with 'lessons on how to sing' rather than 'about'. Also, keep clauses concise and use commas appropriately.

× Who do you want to sing for?

✓ Who would you like to sing for?

The student's response used 'I would like to sing for my boyfriend' which matches polite preference. The question form 'Who do you want to sing for?' is informal but acceptable; suggesting 'Who would you like to sing for?' is more natural for polite context and matches modal preference 'would like' used by the student.

× I would like to sing for my boyfriend because he is the most important person in my life and I'd like to present some shows to my boyfriend.

✓ I would like to sing for my boyfriend because he is the most important person in my life, and I'd like to put on some shows for him.

Repetition of 'my boyfriend' is stylistically poor; use pronoun 'him'. 'Present some shows to' is unnatural in English; use 'put on some shows for'. Also add a comma before the conjunction joining two independent clauses.

× Yes, uh, especially your tone of voice can really cheer people up and improve their moods.

✓ Yes. Especially a person's tone of voice can really cheer people up and improve their moods.

Using 'your' makes the statement conversational but vague; for general statements, use 'a person's' or 'the' depending on context. Here 'a person's tone of voice' is clearer. Also split into two sentences for clarity.

× So in social situation it's could be a great enjoyable activity.

✓ So in social situations it could be a very enjoyable activity.

Use plural 'situations' for general meaning (singular/plural issue), remove extra 'it''s' (contraction error) and place modal correctly: 'it could be'. 'Great enjoyable' is ungrammatical; use 'very enjoyable' or 'greatly enjoyable'. Also use correct word order: 'a very enjoyable activity'.