Shoes— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Your answer is natural, relevant and includes specific examples, but it is slightly repetitive (two openings with “Yes”) and a bit long. Aim to give a clear topic sentence, then one or two concise supporting details. Reduce redundancy and vary linking words to improve coherence.

예시: I do. I usually buy a pair of shoes about once a month because I like to update my wardrobe. For example, I recently bought comfortable sneakers for walking and a pair of black high heels for formal events.

제안: Good clear answer with reasons and process, but there are small grammar and phrasing issues (“compare price and with customer reviews”). Try to use one linking phrase and correct collocations (e.g., “compare prices and read customer reviews”). Keep it concise and avoid listing too many functions in one sentence.

예시: Yes, I bought a pair of sneakers online last month. I find it convenient because I can compare prices, read customer reviews, and have the shoes delivered to my home.

제안: Clear, concise and specific. To improve further, combine sentences with linking words for smoother flow and avoid short fragmented sentences. You can also give a brief reason for the price difference to add depth.

예시: I don't have a strict limit, but I usually spend around CN¥500 per pair because materials and brand affect the price. For example, basic slippers cost much less, while branded sneakers or high heels are more expensive.

제안: Strong answer: direct topic sentence, clear reason and specific example. To reach an even higher score, add a linking word to connect reason and example and vary vocabulary slightly (e.g., “supportive” → “cushioned” or “ergonomic”) to show range.

예시: I prefer comfortable shoes because if my feet hurt I’ll be unhappy all day. Moreover, I often go hiking and walking, so practical, supportive footwear is essential for me.

× I enjoy buying different kinds of shoes and usually buy a pair about once a month.

✓ I enjoy buying different kinds of shoes and usually buy a pair every month.

'About once a month' is not wrong but 'about' is a vague quantifier; to be consistent and natural with frequency routines, 'every month' is clearer. Suggestion: use consistent quantifiers for habitual actions.

× Yes, because I like to update my wardrobe and I wear different shoes for work and leisure.

✓ Yes, because I like to update my wardrobe, and I wear different shoes for work and for leisure.

Comma needed before coordinating conjunction linking independent clauses; also parallel structure benefits from repeating 'for' for clarity ('for work and for leisure'). Suggestion: maintain parallelism and include comma before 'and' when joining two full clauses.

× For example, I recently bought a comfortable pair of sneakers for walking and a pair of black high heels for formal events.

✓ For example, I recently bought a comfortable pair of sneakers for walking and a pair of black high heels for formal events.

Sentence is grammatically correct; no quantifier error. No change needed.

× I find online shopping very convenient because I can easily browse the selection of styles and size, compare price and with customer reviews, and have the shoes delivered to my home.

✓ I find online shopping very convenient because I can easily browse the selection of styles and sizes, compare prices with customer reviews, and have the shoes delivered to my home.

Multiple issues: 'size' should be plural 'sizes' to match 'styles'; 'compare price and with customer reviews' is ungrammatical — use 'compare prices with customer reviews' or 'compare prices and read customer reviews'. Suggestions: keep parallel noun forms (styles/sizes), pluralize countable nouns (prices), and keep parallel structure when listing actions.

× I don't have a strict limit, but I usually spend around CN¥500 on a pair of shoes.

✓ I don't have a strict limit, but I usually spend around CN¥500 on a pair of shoes.

Sentence is fine structurally and grammatically. No change needed.

× It depends on the type.

✓ It depends on the type of shoe.

'Type' is vague; adding 'of shoe' clarifies meaning. Suggestion: make the noun explicit when context might be ambiguous.

× Basic slippers are much cheaper, while high heels or branded sneakers can be considerably more expensive.

✓ Basic slippers are much cheaper, while high heels or branded sneakers can be considerably more expensive.

Sentence is grammatically correct; plural forms match. No change needed.

× I prefer comfortable shoes because if my feet are uncomfortable, I would be unhappy all day.

✓ I prefer comfortable shoes because if my feet are uncomfortable, I will be unhappy all day.

Using 'would' suggests a conditional or hypothetical. Here the speaker states a likely consequence, so present-future 'will' is more appropriate. Suggestion: use 'will' for predictable results; reserve 'would' for hypothetical or conditional statements.

× I do a lot of outdoor activities such as hiking and walking, so practical, supportive footwear is essential for me.

✓ I do a lot of outdoor activities such as hiking and walking, so practical, supportive footwear is essential for me.

Sentence is correct: 'hiking and walking' are proper gerunds after 'such as'. No change needed.