Shoes— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more direct and natural: start with a clear topic sentence (

예시: I enjoy buying shoes and usually purchase new pairs four or five times a year. If there’s a special occasion, I might buy more to match outfits. Also, I keep a running list of styles I want so I don’t buy on impulse.

제안: Improve fluency and accuracy: use concise phrasing and one or two linking words to connect ideas. Mention a brief example or condition (e.g., return policy) to add specificity.

예시: Yes, I often buy shoes online because it’s convenient and comfortable. For example, I recently ordered sneakers from a well-known site and appreciated the free returns, which made the process low-risk.

제안: Fix grammar and be specific: use a clear topic sentence, correct verb forms, and give a currency or range with context. Explain why you choose higher-priced shoes.

예시: It depends on the shoe type and quality; I usually spend around 50,000 to 120,000 Naira on a good pair. I’m willing to pay more for durability and comfort, especially for formal shoes I wear often.

제안: Clarify and correct vocabulary and structure: start with a direct statement, use correct words (

예시: I prefer comfortable shoes for everyday activities but choose fashionable ones for special occasions. For instance, I wear hiking boots for outdoor trips but a stylish pair of loafers or heels to weddings or formal parties.

× I like my shoes very often.

✓ I buy shoes very often.

The student used 'like' with 'my shoes' which is likely intended to describe frequency of purchasing, not liking possession. This is a pronoun/word choice issue that makes the meaning unclear. Use the verb 'buy' to match the question about purchasing frequency.

× Umm, most times 4-5 times in a year.

✓ I buy shoes most of the time, about four to five times a year.

This fragment lacks a proper verb and clear structure. It should be a complete present simple statement describing habitual action. Use 'I buy' and write numbers in words or numerals consistently.

× Uh, when there's a new occasion, I attempt to add more to the lists than the visual buying range.

✓ When there is a new occasion, I try to add more shoes to my collection rather than just buying what looks good.

The original is awkward and unclear ('visual buying range' and 'add more to the lists'). This is a sentence structure and word choice issue. Use 'try to add more shoes to my collection' to express the intended meaning clearly and use 'rather than' to show contrast.

× Yes, I have been.

✓ Yes, I have.

The examiner asked if the student has ever bought shoes online; the correct short answer is 'Yes, I have.' 'I have been' is incomplete and incorrect here because 'have been' requires a complement (e.g., 'I have been buying'). This is a present perfect form usage error.

× Buying shoes online is stress free and easy and you can easily get it at the comfort of your home.

✓ Buying shoes online is stress-free and easy, and you can easily get them from the comfort of your home.

'It' wrongly refers to 'shoes' (plural), so use 'them.' Also 'from the comfort of your home' is the idiomatic prepositional phrase. Hyphenate 'stress-free.' This is a pronoun and preposition usage issue.

× You don't need to undergo the stress of going out to get it under the scorching sun.

✓ You don't need to undergo the stress of going out and being under the scorching sun to buy them.

The original misplaces 'under the scorching sun' and uses 'it' for plural 'shoes.' The corrected sentence places the prepositional phrase correctly and uses 'them.' This fixes preposition placement and pronoun agreement.

× That depend on the type of shoe I want to get or the quality.

✓ That depends on the type of shoe I want or the quality.

Subject 'That' (referring to spending amount) is singular, so the verb should be 'depends' not 'depend.' Also 'want to get' can be simplified to 'want.' This is a subject-verb agreement error.

× Most times I prefer to go for high quality shoes and it ranges from 50,000 upwards depending on the quality and the brand of course.

✓ Most of the time I prefer to buy high-quality shoes, and the price ranges from 50,000 upwards depending on the quality and the brand, of course.

Use 'most of the time' and hyphenate 'high-quality' as a compound adjective. 'It ranges' incorrectly uses 'it' for 'price'; use 'the price ranges.' This addresses quantifier phrase and pronoun reference and article use.

× Umm I will say the boats depending on where I'm going and what I'm doing.

✓ I would say boots, depending on where I'm going and what I'm doing.

'The boats' is likely a misspelling of 'boots' and 'I will say' is better as 'I would say' for preference. This corrects word choice and modal nuance; it's a pronoun/word error.

× Whenever I'm going for a simple event like hiking or outdoor activities my friend, I prefer a comfortable show.

✓ When I'm going for a simple outing like hiking or other outdoor activities, I prefer comfortable shoes.

'Simple event' is awkward; 'outing' fits better. 'Show' is a typo for 'shoe' and 'comfortable' should modify 'shoes' without article when speaking generally. This fixes adjective usage and word choice.

× But if I'm going for a high class event like a party or a wedding, I prefer a fashionable show to match up with the event.

✓ But if I'm going to a high-class event like a party or a wedding, I prefer fashionable shoes to match the occasion.

Use 'high-class' hyphenated, change 'show' to 'shoes,' and 'match up with the event' to the more natural 'match the occasion.' This corrects adjective formation and idiomatic phrasing.