Rules— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be clearer and more concise: start with a direct topic sentence, then give two specific, well-connected details using linking words. Avoid filler words (uh, um) and grammatical errors (subject-verb agreement, incorrect phrases).

예시: Yes. There are many rules at my school. For example, students are not allowed to use smartphones during lessons, and they must arrive on time for class. Because of these rules, lessons run smoothly and teachers can keep students focused.

제안: Answer directly and give clear reasons with logical linking: use correct grammar (count/mass nouns, comparative forms) and avoid contradictory or unclear statements. Provide two specific benefits and a brief consequence. Limit to 2–4 sentences.

예시: Yes, I think more rules can help students. For instance, rules teach discipline and improve time management, so students become more punctual. As a result, they can concentrate better in class and perform well academically.

제안: Be specific about the teacher and what they did: name one or two concrete actions the teacher took, and use clear language to describe the impact. Avoid mispronounced/incorrect words (T-shirt → teachers) and reduce hesitations.

예시: Yes, I had a couple of dedicated teachers who greatly influenced me. For example, one teacher gave extra tutorials and practical feedback, which helped me gain confidence and a clearer sense of direction in my studies.

제안: Give a clear preference and support it with two logical reasons. Use correct vocabulary (prefer, rules, morals, discipline) and coherent linking (firstly, secondly, however). Avoid unclear phrases and repetitions.

예시: I prefer more rules at school because they help students maintain discipline and focus on both studies and extracurricular activities. However, rules should be fair and flexible so students still have some freedom to be creative.

제안: Clarify meaning and use correct descriptions: say what ‘strict’ meant (high expectations, punctuality) and give a short example of their behaviour and the positive outcome. Avoid vague or incorrect phrases (functional, estate).

예시: Yes. My department head was very strict and expected punctuality and high-quality work. For example, he returned assignments quickly with detailed criticism, which improved my writing and study habits.

제안: Give a direct yes/no and one clear reason why, plus a brief specific example of what you would do as a teacher. Remove unrelated information and hesitations; use correct verb forms and vocabulary (teaching, community).

예시: Yes, I would like to teach, especially because it allows me to engage with the community and help students grow. For instance, I would run community projects and interactive lessons to develop students' practical skills and social responsibility.

× Yes, uh, there are a lot of rules at school. Uh, firstly student, uh, cannot watch any smartphone and they do not, uh, delay in class and they uh, cannot able to talk with, uh, their PR in around into their class, umm, during the lecture.

✓ Yes, there are a lot of rules at school. First, students cannot use smartphones, they must not be late for class, and they are not allowed to talk with their peers during the lecture.

Original sentence mixes singular 'student' with plural contexts and uses incorrect noun forms ('smartphone' instead of 'use smartphones') and awkward phrases. Use plural 'students' to match 'there are a lot of rules' and list parallel rules with consistent verbs: 'cannot use', 'must not be late', 'are not allowed to talk'. Suggestions: ensure subject number matches verbs and keep parallel structure.

× Definitely student are more benefited if there are too much rules, uh, especially they learn about the discipline and time management.

✓ Definitely students benefit more if there are many rules; especially they learn discipline and time management.

'Student' should be plural 'students' to agree with general statement. 'Are more benefited' is unnatural—use active 'benefit'. 'Too much rules' is incorrect quantifier and agreement; use 'many rules'. Suggest using simple present for general truths: 'students benefit'.

× Uh, also they are able to be punctual, uh, that help a student to be energetic and take a risk and uh, scared if they do.

✓ They also become more punctual, which helps students to be more energetic and willing to take risks instead of being scared.

Original uses awkward forms 'able to be punctual' and mixes singular/plural. 'Take a risk and scared' is ungrammatical. Use comparative/adverb forms: 'more punctual', 'more energetic', 'willing to take risks', and a clear contrast 'instead of being scared'. Keep subject number consistent.

× Yes, I had a couple of, uh, dedicated T-shirt who, uh, had a great approach in my life and they taught me a lot of things, how to be an, uh, get, uh, sense of stability and how I, uh, how I need to gain my knowledge.

✓ Yes, I had a couple of dedicated teachers who had a great influence on my life and taught me many things, such as how to develop a sense of stability and how I should gain knowledge.

'T-shirt' is incorrect vocabulary; should be 'teachers'. 'Who' correctly introduces clause, but 'approach in my life' is awkward; use 'influence on my life'. 'How to be an, uh, get, uh, sense' is ungrammatical—use 'how to develop a sense'. Use modal 'should' for advice. Ensure pronouns and noun choices are accurate.

× I personally pepper more roles at a school because that, uh, is earliest, uh, if we had, uh, morals there, then uh, student, uh, maintain all sort of things discipline.

✓ I personally prefer more rules at school because if we have morals and clear rules, then students will maintain all kinds of discipline.

'Pepper' is wrong word; should be 'prefer'. 'Roles' should be 'rules'. Use present tense 'have' for general condition and plural 'students' to match. 'All sort of things discipline' is ungrammatical—use 'all kinds of discipline' or 'maintain discipline in various areas'.

× Yes, I had. When I was at university this time my university department head was really strict and he was really functional.

✓ Yes, I did. When I was at university, my department head was very strict and very professional.

Answering 'Have you ever...' requires 'Yes, I have' or in past narrative 'Yes, I did'. 'I had' is ambiguous. 'This time' is confusing; remove. 'Functional' is incorrect word choice for a person; use 'professional' or 'effective'. Use past tense consistently for past experience.

× Although he's state, but although his estate, he's good person and good human.

✓ Although he seemed strict, he was a good person and a kind human being.

Original has confused phrases 'he's state' and 'his estate' which are incorrect. Replace with intended meaning 'seemed strict'. Use consistent past tense 'was'. Include articles 'a good person' and 'a kind human being'. Avoid redundant conjunctions: use 'although' once.

× Definitely, uh, can't I live in Canada, uh, when I back my country, if I had a chance, I definitely go for teasing, uh, and a country set that help, uh, will help me to, uh, engage with society and help to, for people and for community, especially for it would be great for, for.

✓ Definitely. If I can't live in Canada and when I return to my country, if I have the chance I would definitely go into teaching in a setting that will help me engage with society and help people and the community.

Original is fragmented, has wrong word order and incorrect words ('teasing' instead of 'teaching'), incorrect tense sequences. Clarify conditional structure: 'If I can't live in Canada and when I return... if I have the chance, I would go into teaching'. Use 'teaching' and 'setting' and concise purpose clauses 'to help me engage with society and help people'. Ensure modal verbs and conditionals are correct.