Rules— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more concise and organized: give a clear topic sentence, then one or two specific details. Avoid repetition and filler words (uh, umm). Use correct article use (the my university → my university) and clearer phrasing (access control at the gates).

예시: Yes. My university has many rules, especially strict access control at the main gates. For example, every time I enter the campus I must show my ID at security, which makes the campus very secure and regulated.

제안: Answer directly and give a clear reason with one supporting example. Avoid grammatical errors (students will benefit → students would benefit) and unnecessary repetition. Use linking words like however or because to show contrast or reason.

예시: No, I don't think more rules would benefit students because strict rules mainly help the school administration. For example, adding more regulations might make it easier for staff to monitor behaviour, but it could also limit students' independence.

제안: Start with a clear topic sentence and correct names/phrasing (I had a dedicated teacher named Brian? or My teacher Brian?). Be specific about what she did and use one linking word to add detail. Reduce repetition (works very hard / works overtime every almost every day).

예시: Yes. I had a very dedicated teacher in high school named Ms. Brian. She regularly held extra classes and stayed after school to help students prepare for public exams, and her commitment inspired many of us to work harder.

제안: Give a concise opinion plus one clear reason and a specific example. Avoid fillers and tighten sentences. Use linking words (because, therefore) to connect opinion and reason.

예시: I prefer fewer rules because most students at my school behave responsibly. For example, when teachers trust students to attend classes and follow deadlines, students feel more motivated and have greater flexibility to learn independently.

제안: Provide a clear topic sentence then one specific example of strictness and its effect. Fix grammar (she was my English teacher; she expected high standards). Avoid trailing off and use a linking word to show contrast (however, consequently).

예시: Yes, I had a very strict English teacher in high school who expected high standards. For instance, she required daily homework and weekly tests, which many students complained about, but her approach improved our exam results.

제안: Answer directly and give one clear reason with a specific example. Avoid fillers and improve grammar (a school that has no rules; students' behaviour). Use linking words like because and for example to make the response coherent.

예시: No, I would not. A rule-free school would be hard to manage because students might behave inappropriately. For example, without rules it would be difficult to prevent serious issues such as stealing or bullying.

× There there are lots of rules for students as my school in my university and their access control in the gates of the door.

✓ There are lots of rules for students at my university, including access control at the gates.

Redundant words ('There there'), awkward preposition use ('as my school in my university'), and unnecessary phrase ('gates of the door') make the sentence ungrammatical and unclear. Use a single subject 'There are' and correct preposition 'at my university'; simplify noun phrase to 'access control at the gates'.

× So every time I enter the my university, I have to get access to get inside of the uh, campus.

✓ So every time I enter my university, I have to show my access pass to get inside the campus.

Incorrect article usage ('the my university') and awkward verb phrases ('get access to get inside of'). Use correct article 'my university' and a clearer verb phrase 'show my access pass' or 'show my ID' and remove unnecessary preposition 'of'.

× And umm, it's very uh tight and it's very strict.

✓ And the security is very tight and the rules are very strict.

Vague pronoun 'it's' used twice makes meaning unclear. Specify nouns matching adjectives: 'security' is 'tight' and 'rules' are 'strict'. Maintain present tense but provide clearer subjects.

× I don't think the student will be benefits from the rules.

✓ I don't think the students will benefit from the rules.

Singular/plural mismatch ('the student' vs general meaning 'students') and incorrect verb form 'be benefits'. Use plural 'students' and base verb 'benefit' after 'will'.

× Instead, I think it's a managed, uh, the management of the school will be benefit because, uh, for more rules they impose on the university will be easier for the, uh, management of the, of the school to manage this student.

✓ Instead, I think the school's management will benefit because imposing more rules on the university will make it easier for them to manage students.

Awkward structure, misplaced phrase 'it's a managed', article and noun phrase errors, and singular/plural inconsistencies ('this student'). Recast the sentence with clear subject 'school's management', correct verb 'will benefit', and plural 'students'.

× Brian had a dedicated teacher during my high school and she is very keen on helping everyone to get high scores during the public examination.

✓ I had a dedicated teacher during high school; she was very keen on helping everyone get high scores in the public examinations.

Inconsistent tense and odd subject 'Brian had'; the speaker should use first person 'I had'. Maintain past tense ('was') for past situation and use 'helping everyone get' (omit 'to') and correct preposition 'in the public examinations'.

× She works very hard and works overtime every almost every day and as a student I can see her dedication and her passion to her.

✓ She worked very hard and worked overtime almost every day, and as a student I could see her dedication and passion for teaching.

Tense should be past to match 'had a dedicated teacher'. Remove duplicate 'every', use 'almost every day', and use correct preposition 'passion for teaching' rather than 'passion to her'.

× I actually prefer to have fewer rules in school because, uh, at the school that I study, I believe most of the people will behave very, umm, appropriately and they will not, uh, abuse the, uh, rules of the school.

✓ I actually prefer fewer rules at school because, at the school I attend, I believe most people behave appropriately and will not abuse the rules.

Use present simple for general truth: 'I attend' not 'that I study'. Remove unnecessary articles ('the school that I study'), streamline 'most people behave' and remove repeated 'the'.

× And This is why I think mutual trust is important for the students and the teachers and the schools.

✓ This is why I think mutual trust is important between students, teachers, and schools.

Capitalization error and awkward article use 'the students and the teachers and the schools'. Use 'between' for relationships and list nouns without repeated 'the'.

× So. A few rules would be beneficial to students to have more flexibility.

✓ So, a few rules would be beneficial because they give students more flexibility.

Fragmented sentence 'So.' and awkward phrasing 'beneficial to students to have'. Combine into one sentence and clarify cause-effect: rules give students flexibility.

× I had a very strict teacher in high school. She is my English teacher at the time and because she expect she has very high expectations for everyone and This is why she had a very strict UH study plan for all of our student and some of the student complained about her UH strict study plan.

✓ I had a very strict teacher in high school. She was my English teacher at the time and she had very high expectations for everyone, which is why she had a very strict study plan for all of us, and some students complained about it.

Inconsistent tense (mixing present 'is' and past 'had'), subject-verb agreement ('student' vs 'students'), and repetition. Use past tense throughout for past events, correct plural nouns, and simplify 'study plan'.

× I don't think I would like to work in a school that have no rules at all, umm, because it will be very hard to control, uh, the student, uh, about their behavior, especially when they intentionally, uh, do uh, bad behaviors like, uh, stealing from uh.

✓ I don't think I would like to work in a school that has no rules at all because it would be very hard to control students' behaviour, especially when they intentionally do bad things like stealing.

Subject-verb agreement error 'that have' should be 'that has'. Use conditional modal 'would' consistently ('would be') and correct possessive 'students' behaviour' (or 'students' behavior'). Remove filler words and incomplete phrase 'stealing from uh' by finishing with 'stealing'.