Hobby— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more concise and natural: start with a clear topic sentence, then give one or two specific supporting details. Avoid repetition (e.g., "planting more trees" and "greeneries"). Use linking words if you add details.

예시: Yes. I enjoy reading and gardening. For example, I often read novels and non-fiction in the evenings, and on weekends I plant and care for leafy trees on my rooftop, which helps me relax and improve my neighbourhood’s greenery.

제안: Correct small grammar errors and remove hesitations. Use past simple consistently and combine sentences with linking words (e.g., "so", "and"). Be specific about activities and frequency.

예시: Yes. As a child I used to plant trees on our rooftop and water them every day. I also added fertilizer when needed, so the trees grew quickly and stayed healthy.

제안: Clarify tense and reduce redundancy. Start with a clear present perfect sentence to show continuity (e.g., "I have enjoyed... since childhood"). Give one or two precise reasons or examples and use correct phrasing for "people from different countries."

예시: Yes, I have enjoyed reading and writing since childhood. Because of these hobbies, I can express my ideas more clearly and connect with people from different countries, and I also continue to enjoy planting trees in my spare time.

제안: Be more fluent and structured: give a direct answer, then briefly compare your hobbies with your family’s. Avoid excessive filler words and repetition.

예시: Not really. I enjoy reading, writing and gardening, while my family members prefer other activities such as watching sports or cooking. However, we sometimes share interests like gardening on special occasions.

× Yes, I have a hobby of reading books and gardening and planting more trees like greeneries and leafy trees.

✓ Yes, I have hobbies: reading, gardening, and planting trees such as evergreen and leafy species.

The original mixes singular 'a hobby' with multiple activities and uses 'greeneries' incorrectly. Use plural 'hobbies' when referring to multiple activities and correct noun 'greenery' or use 'evergreen' as adjective. Also streamline list with commas for clarity.

× It's my habit from my childhood.

✓ It has been my habit since childhood.

'It's my habit from my childhood' is awkward and tense-inconsistent. Use present perfect 'has been' and preposition 'since' to indicate an action continuing from the past to the present.

× In my childhood, I used to plan more trees on my rooftop and uh, water them and take care of them, and sometimes I used some uh, fertilizer on them to grow properly.

✓ In my childhood, I used to plant many trees on my rooftop, water and take care of them, and sometimes I used fertilizer to help them grow properly.

'Plan' is incorrect; the correct verb is 'plant' (same pronunciation but different meaning). 'More trees' is unclear — use 'many trees'. 'Used some fertilizer on them' is wordy; 'used fertilizer to help them grow' is clearer. Maintain past habitual 'used to' which is correct.

× I used to plant more trees as my hobby.

✓ I used to plant many trees as a hobby.

'More trees' is comparative without reference; 'many trees' is appropriate. Also 'as my hobby' is better as 'as a hobby' when describing a general pastime.

× I had a hobby of reading books and writing.

✓ I have had a hobby of reading and writing since childhood.

The question asks about a hobby you've had since childhood; use present perfect 'have had' to show continuity to the present and 'since childhood' for the time reference. 'Reading books and writing' can be simplified to 'reading and writing'.

× It helps me a lot from my childhood and speaking to different countries people and also planting trees as well.

✓ It has helped me a lot since childhood: it improves my communication with people from different countries and I also plant trees.

Original mixes tenses and has awkward phrasing. Use present perfect 'has helped' with 'since childhood'. 'Speaking to different countries people' is incorrect — use 'people from different countries' or 'communicating with people from different countries'. Avoid redundant phrases like 'also... as well'.

× Unfortunately, uh, there are different hobbies in my family members especially I am uh, I have the hobby of reading books and writing and also planting trees and my family members have different hobbies as well.

✓ Unfortunately, my family members have different hobbies. I enjoy reading, writing, and planting trees, while they prefer other activities.

The original sentence is repetitive, ungrammatical and poorly structured. 'There are different hobbies in my family members' is incorrect; use 'my family members have different hobbies'. Remove fillers like 'uh' and split into two clear sentences to improve coherence and fluency.