Hobby— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Correct grammar (verb forms and subject-verb agreement), remove redundancy, and make the answer more concise and natural. Start with a clear topic sentence, then add one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Watch for unnecessary repetition (e.g., "outside outdoors").

예시: I have several hobbies. I usually work out at the gym and go jogging to stay fit, and when I have time I enjoy mountain climbing to relax and enjoy nature.

제안: Use correct tense (simple past) and avoid repetition. Provide a clear topic sentence, then specific details (years, reasons) connected with linking words. Remove fragmented clauses and extra statements unrelated to the question.

예시: Yes, I played soccer for five years during elementary and junior high school. Later, in senior high school I joined the basketball team because I wanted to learn a new sport and stay active.

제안: Answer directly and use correct grammar (articles, verb forms, and sentence structure). Use linking words to show contrast and be specific about how priorities changed. Keep it concise and avoid filler words or repeated phrases.

예시: Not really. I enjoyed many activities like soccer and basketball as a child, but my interests changed as I grew up because my priorities shifted toward studying and outdoor fitness.

제안: Use clearer sentence structure and correct verb forms. Start with a direct response, then give two contrasting specific examples and use linking words (for example, however, whereas). Avoid awkward phrasing like "share send hobbies" and "is more enjoying."

예시: No, we don't share the same hobbies. For example, my sister is interested in dancing, whereas my brother prefers video games; I, on the other hand, enjoy outdoor sports like jogging and climbing.

× I usually works out at the gym and I jogs outside outdoors to stay fit and also if I have time I'll go mountain climbing to feel more relaxed.

✓ I usually work out at the gym and I jog outside to stay fit, and if I have time I'll go mountain climbing to feel more relaxed.

The subject 'I' requires the base form of the verb in the present simple (no -s). 'Works' and 'jogs' are incorrect for 'I'. Also 'outside outdoors' is redundant; use one adverb. Suggestion: use 'I work' and 'I jog' and remove redundant adverbs.

× Yes, I had played soccer for five years in elementary school and junior high school, and also I joined, but I joined a basketball team in my Senior High School.

✓ Yes, I played soccer for five years in elementary school and junior high school, and I joined a basketball team in my senior high school.

The past simple 'played' is appropriate to describe a past habit; 'had played' (past perfect) is unnecessary without a later past reference. Remove the repeated 'but I joined' and correct capitalization of 'senior high school'. Suggestion: use simple past for completed past activities and avoid repetition.

× I I love to learn things.

✓ I love to learn new things.

There is a duplicated pronoun 'I I' and the sentence is incomplete stylistically. Adding 'new' clarifies what is being learned. Suggestion: remove duplication and make the object clearer.

× Not really, I have lot of hobbies in my childhood and like playing soccer and basketball but my interest change as I grow up.

✓ Not really. I had a lot of hobbies in my childhood, like playing soccer and basketball, but my interests changed as I grew up.

'Have lot of' requires the article 'a' and past context needs past tense: 'had'. 'Interest' should be plural 'interests' and 'change' should be past 'changed' to match 'grew up'. Also sentence fragments and punctuation need fixing. Suggestion: use 'a lot of', pluralize when appropriate, and keep consistent past tense for childhood descriptions.

× I as I grew up and and also my goal, my priority shift.

✓ As I grew up, my goals and priorities shifted.

Tense inconsistency: 'grew' is past, so 'shift' must be past 'shifted'. 'Goal, my priority' is awkward singular; use plural 'goals and priorities'. Remove duplicate 'and'. Suggestion: maintain consistent tense and use parallel plural nouns when referring to multiple aspects.

× No we don't share send hobbies like for example my sister interest in dancing.

✓ No, we don't share the same hobbies. For example, my sister is interested in dancing.

Several issues: missing commas, 'send' is a typo for 'same', and 'my sister interest' needs the copula 'is' and the participial adjective 'interested in'. Also 'share the same hobbies' requires 'the'. Suggestion: fix typos, include necessary articles and linking verbs, and use 'interested in' to describe preferences.

× However my brother is more enjoying video games.

✓ However, my brother enjoys video games more.

'More enjoying' is incorrect; 'enjoy' is a stative verb that typically uses simple present 'enjoys'. Place 'more' after the verb or use 'enjoys more' to indicate preference. Add comma after 'However'. Suggestion: use 'enjoys video games more' or 'prefers video games'.

× As for me I enjoying outdoor sports.

✓ As for me, I enjoy outdoor sports.

After subject 'I', use base verb 'enjoy' in present simple; 'enjoying' would need a supporting verb (e.g., 'I am enjoying'). Here the simple present expresses a general habit. Add comma after introductory phrase. Suggestion: use 'I enjoy' for regular preferences.