Hobby— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more concise and fluent: start with a clear topic sentence, avoid fillers (umm, uh), and use precise vocabulary. Add one specific detail about what you enjoy in horror or mystery films. Use one linking phrase to connect reason.

예시: I enjoy watching movies in my free time, especially horror and mystery films. For example, I like psychological thrillers that build tension slowly because they create an adrenaline rush and keep me guessing until the end.

제안: Answer directly with a topic sentence, avoid repetition and fillers, and provide one specific reason or memory. Mention a brief example of a favorite episode or character to be more concrete.

예시: As a child, I loved watching cartoons on TV, especially SpongeBob SquarePants. I remember laughing at SpongeBob’s silly adventures, especially the episode where he tries to cook a Krabby Patty, because his clumsy behavior always made me laugh.

제안: Give a clear, concise comparison between past and present. Use a linking word (however/now) to show change, and include a specific example of how you enjoy it now with family.

예시: Yes, I’ve enjoyed watching TV since childhood, but my hobby has changed: back then I watched cartoons, whereas now I prefer watching films with my family. For instance, we often watch family dramas together on weekends.

제안: Use a clear topic sentence and remove hesitations. Explain briefly what 'coffee hunting' involves and give a specific detail (where you go or what you try) to make the answer more vivid.

예시: Yes, my family and I enjoy "coffee hunting," which means we try different cafés around the city on weekends. For example, last weekend we visited a small roastery to sample their single-origin espresso and compare flavors.

× Yes, I have umm, during my leisure time, my hobbies, uh, normally watching movies, especially uh, horror movies.

✓ Yes, during my leisure time my hobby is normally watching movies, especially horror films.

The original sentence misuses verb + -ing structure as a noun phrase and has awkward noun agreement. 'Watching' as a gerund can be a noun, but the sentence needs a singular subject 'my hobby is' rather than 'my hobbies, normally watching'. Also 'horror movies' is better expressed as 'horror films' for register. Suggestion: use 'my hobby is watching...' or 'I normally watch...'.

× I love it because it makes umm adrenaline rush and I really love umm movies that kind of mystery movies.

✓ I love them because they give me an adrenaline rush, and I really like mystery movies.

Subject-pronoun agreement and present tense verbs were inconsistent. 'It makes adrenaline rush' is incorrect: 'they give me an adrenaline rush' matches plural 'movies'. Also avoid repetition ('I love... I really love...') and use 'like' for preference. Use 'mystery movies' rather than 'that kind of mystery movies'.

× Yeah, I have uh, hobbies during my childhood, which is watching TV.

✓ Yeah, I had hobbies during my childhood, which was watching TV.

The time reference 'during my childhood' requires past tense. 'Have' and 'is' should be changed to 'had' and 'was' to match past time frame.

× I love watching cartoon during, during my childhood.

✓ I loved watching cartoons during my childhood.

Tense should be past ('loved'). 'Cartoon' should be plural 'cartoons' when referring to the genre generally. Also remove repeated filler words.

× And yeah, the cartoon that I really love is SpongeBob, which is, I really enjoy it because, you know, it is umm, really funny movie and.

✓ And yeah, the cartoon I really loved was SpongeBob because I enjoyed it; it was a really funny show.

Pronoun and tense consistency: when speaking of childhood, use past tense ('loved', 'enjoyed', 'was'). 'Which is, I really enjoy it' is redundant and ungrammatical. Also 'funny movie' is wrong for a TV cartoon; 'show' is appropriate.

× I think hobby that I had since childhood is just like I said just now, which is watching TV.

✓ I think the hobby I have had since childhood is, as I said, watching TV.

When indicating a hobby continuing from childhood to present, the present perfect 'have had' is appropriate. Also add 'the' before 'hobby' and improve word order for clarity.

× The same with watching movies.

✓ It's the same with watching movies.

Sentence lacked a verb. Adding 'It's' provides the necessary verb and subject and keeps the gerund phrase 'watching movies' correct.

× So during my childhood maybe I have maybe I have a lot watching cartoon, but now I'm just watching movies and with my family.

✓ So during my childhood I watched a lot of cartoons, but now I just watch movies with my family.

Tense should be past for childhood ('watched'). The phrase 'have a lot watching cartoon' is ungrammatical—use 'watched a lot of cartoons'. In the present clause, use simple present 'watch' for habitual action. Remove redundant 'maybe'.

× Yeah, we, we have a, we have the same hobbies, which is, umm, coffee hunting.

✓ Yeah, we have the same hobby, which is coffee hunting.

'Hobbies' vs 'hobby' mismatch with singular description 'which is'. If it's one shared activity, use singular 'hobby'. Subject-verb agreement: 'we have the same hobby'.

× We really love coffee and, uh, we usually, umm, do it, uh, during weekends.

✓ We really love coffee and we usually do it during the weekends.

'Do it' is vague but acceptable; more natural is 'go coffee hunting' or 'do this'. Also 'during weekends' should be 'on weekends' or 'during the weekends'. Use consistent pronoun reference and preposition.

× And I think it's a best way to spend my time with my family.

✓ And I think it's the best way to spend time with my family.

Use definite article 'the best' for superlative. Also omit 'my' before 'time' or keep 'my time' — both possible; 'spend time with my family' is more natural. Superlatives require 'the'.