Walking— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be clear and directly answer the question first (e.g., “Yes, I walk a lot” or “No, I don’t walk much”). Avoid repetition and filler words. Keep it within 3–4 concise sentences: state frequency/duration, give a reason, and one specific example. Use correct verbs and simple sentence structures (e.g., “walk” not “work”).

예시: Yes, I walk a lot. When I have free time I usually go to the park and walk for about two hours. I enjoy these walks because they help me relax and stay fit. For example, last Sunday I walked around the lake near my home for two hours.

제안: Good structure: direct answer plus supporting details. Improve grammar (past tense consistency), and add linking words for coherence. Be slightly more specific about frequency or memorable example. Keep to 2–4 sentences.

예시: Yes, I often went outside as a child. My brother and I spent most afternoons at the playground or park, playing on the swings and kicking a ball around. I remember one summer when we played there every day after school.

제안: Start with a clear topic sentence (e.g., “People walk in parks mainly to relax and exercise”). Avoid incorrect phrases and unclear words (e.g., “working at the park,” “fit the sword”). Use linking words to list reasons and give one specific example or result. Keep sentences grammatically correct and concise.

예시: People walk in parks mainly to relax and stay healthy. For example, many people walk to reduce stress and clear their minds, while others walk regularly to lose weight and improve fitness. As a result, parks are popular places for both mental and physical wellbeing.

제안: Answer directly and use correct conditional tense (If I had the chance…). Be specific about the place and reason. Avoid vague statements and incorrect grammar; explain why it appeals to you and mention one detail about the experience. Limit to 2–3 clear sentences.

예시: If I had the chance, I would like to walk the Camino de Santiago in Spain. I am interested because it is a historic pilgrimage route with beautiful scenery, and many people say the long walks are both physically and spiritually rewarding.

제안: Give a concise past-tense response: state where and when, then briefly explain why and one specific detail about the visit. Correct word choice (e.g., “Bundall Beach” or “the beach”) and grammar (past tense, remove redundancy). Use linking words for coherence.

예시: Two weeks ago I went to Bundall Beach for a walk. I had been stressed after a health test that day, so I wanted a quiet place with beautiful scenery to relax. The peaceful beach and sea breeze helped me calm down.

× I think I love work a lot umm if I compare with the other people because usually when I have the free time I go to park and I walk around 2 hours so I think I woke her up and then I like working at the.

✓ I think I love work a lot, umm. If I compare myself with other people, usually when I have free time I go to the park and walk for around two hours, so I think I wake up earlier and then I like working out.

Errors: missing and incorrect articles ('the park' vs 'go to park'), incorrect pronoun/comparison ('compare with the other people' -> 'compare myself with other people'), awkward phrase 'walk around 2 hours' -> 'walk for around two hours', 'woke her up' is incorrect context -> 'wake up earlier', 'working at the.' unclear -> 'working out'. Suggestion: Use correct articles before singular countable nouns ('the park'), use 'compare myself with' for personal comparison, use 'walk for' + duration, use present simple for habitual actions ('wake up earlier'), and use the correct verb phrase ('working out').

× If I remember my childhood, I often went out with my brother and we hung out at the playground or the park.

✓ If I remember my childhood, I often went out with my brother and we hung out at the playground or the park.

No correction needed for tense here; sentence is acceptable. The past tense 'went' and 'hung out' correctly describe habitual past actions. Suggestion: Keep past simple for repeated actions in childhood.

× We like to play on the swings and kick or ball around, so we spend most afternoon outside.

✓ We liked to play on the swings and kick the ball around, so we spent most afternoons outside.

Errors: tense consistency (student was talking about childhood, so past simple 'liked' and 'spent' is appropriate), incorrect phrase 'kick or ball around' should be 'kick the ball around', article and plural: 'most afternoon' -> 'most afternoons'. Suggestion: Use past tense for past habits and correct collocations: 'kick the ball around' and pluralize 'afternoons' when speaking generally about multiple days.

× Umm I think because when they working at the park they can release the stress and they can become calm and also they can lose the weight as well so they can be fit the sword.

✓ Umm I think because when they are working in the park they can relieve stress and become calm, and they can also lose weight so they can become fit.

Errors: missing auxiliary 'are' for present continuous ('they working' -> 'they are working'), incorrect preposition 'at the park' -> 'in the park' (either 'in' or 'at' but 'in the park' is natural), wrong verb 'release the stress' -> 'relieve stress', unnecessary article 'the' before 'weight', awkward ending 'fit the sword' -> 'fit'. Suggestion: Use 'are working' for continuous actions, 'relieve stress' is the correct collocation, omit unnecessary articles before uncountable nouns like 'weight', and keep the final adjective 'fit' without extra words.

× If I have chance I would like to go to the Santiago we where is in Spain and like especially for the Christian they go to the path in the Santiago and they like train their.

✓ If I had the chance, I would like to go to Santiago, which is in Spain. Especially Christians go on the Camino de Santiago, and they like to walk there.

Errors: conditional form needs past tense 'If I had the chance' for hypothetical present, article errors ('the Santiago' -> 'Santiago'), awkward clause 'we where is in Spain' -> 'which is in Spain', incorrect phrase 'for the Christian' -> 'Christians', wrong noun 'path in the Santiago' -> 'Camino de Santiago' (common name) and 'train their' unclear -> 'walk there' or 'undertake the pilgrimage'. Suggestion: Use second conditional 'If I had..., I would...' for hypothetical situations, use correct place names without unnecessary articles, and use proper nouns and verbs ('walk' or 'undertake the pilgrimage').

× I went to the bundle beach 2 weeks ago to work because the day I took heart test and I got too much stress and I need that's why I needed the beautiful scenery and the quiet place without any peoples so.

✓ I went to Bundal Beach two weeks ago to relax because on that day I had a heart test and I felt very stressed, so I needed a beautiful, quiet place without any people.

Errors: place name capitalization and possible misspelling ('bundle beach' -> 'Bundal Beach' as a placeholder), preposition and article errors ('the day I took heart test' -> 'on that day I had a heart test'), past tense consistency ('I got too much stress' -> 'I felt very stressed'), unnecessary 'I need that's why I needed' redundancy -> 'so I needed', 'peoples' incorrect plural -> 'people'. Suggestion: Use past simple for completed events, correct collocations ('had a heart test' or 'had a cardiac test'), avoid redundant phrasing, and use 'people' as uncountable plural.