Keys— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be concise and correct vocabulary, start with a clear topic sentence and then add one brief supporting detail. Avoid mistakes (kids/keys) and unnecessary words. Use linking words if you add a reason.

예시: No, I don't carry many keys. I only have one house key, and I prefer to travel light because carrying extra items makes me feel weighed down.

제안: Answer directly then give a specific brief example. Use correct words (keys, not kids) and connect ideas with a linking phrase like “however” or “but.” Avoid vague phrases.

예시: No, I haven't lost my keys. However, my boyfriend once lost his keys, but because we share a spare key, it didn't cause a major problem.

제안: Provide a clear topic sentence, then one concise past example with specific details (when, what happened, result). Remove unclear fragments and unnecessary numbers unless explained.

예시: No, I don't often forget my keys. Once I accidentally locked myself out of the house and had to call a locksmith, who charged about 200 currency units to open the door.

제안: Start with a clear opinion, then give one specific reason and a brief personal example. Avoid grammatical errors and clarify where the spare key is kept without unnecessary wording.

예시: No, I don't think it's a good idea because it could be unsafe. Instead, I keep a spare key hidden under a plant near the house, and only my boyfriend and I know about it.

× No, I don't bring a number of kids with me because I only have one key to open the door of my house and also I didn't want to bring a lot of things heavy which make me happy feel heavy.

✓ No, I don't bring a number of keys with me because I only have one key to open the door of my house and also I didn't want to bring a lot of heavy things that make me feel weighed down.

The original uses 'kids' instead of 'keys' (wrong word) and mixes singular/plural and word order. 'A number of' is incorrect here; say 'many' or simply 'a lot of' if needed, but context means 'keys'. 'Things heavy' should be 'heavy things', and 'make me happy feel heavy' is incorrect word order and meaning; correct is 'make me feel weighed down' or 'feel heavy'. Use past tense consistently for 'didn't want'.

× No I haven't, my boyfriend has lost his kids before but because I had the same key so it didn't happen, a huge problem.

✓ No, I haven't. My boyfriend has lost his keys before, but because I had a spare key, it didn't become a huge problem.

'Kids' is the wrong word; should be 'keys'. Run-on sentence fixed by splitting into two. 'Because I had the same key so it didn't happen' is ungrammatical; use 'because' or 'so' not both. 'Become a huge problem' clarifies meaning.

× I don't often forget the key, but once I had locked myself out when I was a house so I asked a repairman to come to fix and opened our door. With 200.

✓ I don't often forget my key, but once I locked myself out when I was at home, so I asked a repairman to come and open our door. It cost 200.

Use 'my key' (possessive). 'Had locked myself out' can be simplified to 'locked myself out' in past simple. 'When I was a house' is wrong; use 'at home'. 'Come to fix and opened' is wordy and ungrammatical; use 'come and open'. 'With 200' is unclear—clarified to 'It cost 200'. Maintain past tense consistently.

× I don't think it's a good idea because of the safety reasons.

✓ I don't think it's a good idea because of safety reasons.

Use 'because of safety reasons' without the definite article 'the'. Alternatively say 'for safety reasons'. 'Because of the safety reasons' is unnatural.

× So in my case I kept my spare key under the plant so nobody knows except me and my boyfriend which we have the spare key out of the house.

✓ So in my case I keep my spare key under a plant, so nobody knows except me and my boyfriend; we keep the spare key outside the house.

Tense and pronoun errors: use present 'keep' for habitual action. 'Under the plant' -> 'under a plant' unless a specific plant was mentioned. 'Which we have the spare key out of the house' is ungrammatical; clarify as 'we keep the spare key outside the house'. Use semicolon or separate clauses for clarity.