Building— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Make your response more natural and concise. Start with a clear topic sentence, avoid unnecessary words like 'Sir' and contractions like ''cause', and correct grammar (e.g. 'is seen very fascinating' → 'is very impressive' or 'looks fascinating'). Add one brief supporting detail using a linking word to make it coherent.

예시: Yes. I live in Dubai, and the Burj Khalifa is close to my home. Because it is the tallest building in the world, it always looks impressive and attracts many tourists.

제안: Use correct verb forms and clearer linking phrases. Begin with a direct topic sentence, then give a specific reason and an example. Replace incorrect phrases ('like collect', 'have been interesting on', 'lookout of') with natural alternatives.

예시: Yes, I often photograph buildings. I have been interested in architecture since childhood, so I enjoy capturing interesting façades and details, for example the intricate patterns on old mosques.

제안: Avoid hesitations and choose accurate vocabulary. Start with a clear statement, then add a specific reason using a linking word. Replace 'grateful' with 'impressive' or 'spectacular' and remove filler words like 'uh'.

예시: Yes, I would like to visit the Burj Khalifa. Because it offers incredible views from the observation deck and is an impressive feat of engineering, I think it would be an unforgettable experience.

× Yes Sir, 'cause I live in Dubai city, the Burj Khalifa is near my home and it is seen very fascinating.

✓ Yes Sir, because I live in Dubai city, the Burj Khalifa is near my home and it looks very fascinating.

The original uses informal ''cause' and an incorrect passive construction 'is seen very fascinating'. Replace ''cause' with 'because' for formal speech. 'Is seen very fascinating' is ungrammatical; use active linking verb 'looks' to describe appearance. Also 'Dubai city' is redundant but acceptable; consider 'Dubai' instead.

× Yes, I like collect photos of buildings because since my childhood I have been interesting on buildings and architecture.

✓ Yes, I like collecting photos of buildings because since my childhood I have been interested in buildings and architecture.

'Like' should be followed by the gerund 'collecting' not the base verb 'collect'. 'Have been interesting on' is incorrect: 'interesting' is an adjective that describes something, not the subject's state; the correct passive/state construction is 'have been interested in'. Replace preposition 'on' with 'in'.

× I always lookout of their design.

✓ I always look out for their design.

The phrase 'lookout of' is incorrect. Use the phrasal verb 'look out for' meaning to pay attention to, or better 'pay attention to their design' or 'I always admire their design'. Ensure correct spacing: 'look out' as two words.

× Yes, I would like to visit Burj Khalifa because it's, uh, very grateful and very attractive.

✓ Yes, I would like to visit the Burj Khalifa because it's very impressive and very attractive.

'Grateful' describes feelings of a person who feels gratitude, not a building. Use 'impressive' or 'grand' to describe a building. Also include the definite article 'the' before 'Burj Khalifa' in English. Remove filler 'uh' for clarity.